Erectile Dysfunction Community
Cant stay hard
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Cant stay hard

Hello, I am a 18 year old guy, my size is small (12 cm) and I can not keep an erection, especially when I am with my girlfriend. During foreplay I am hard but when it comes to do the deed it starts getting limp.
I lost my virginity this year with her (It was like two minutes sex with a condom). I have been with her for three months now, and we actually had "sex" only that time, because of my erection problem.
Please can you give me some advice on what should I do. How can I solve this problem, Please help me.

Did anyone have the same problem and solved it? If yes, please can you give me some advice? I'm desperate..
You may be describing a type of Performance Anxiety Erectile Dysfunction. This can develop overnight. It is very easily fixed. This can be done usually, though not always, without medication. The commonest cause of erectile dysfunction in young men is performance anxiety and the commonest cause of this is watching yourself trying to get or maintain an erection. Once a man is up in the audience looking at himself he is doomed to failure.  

Here is what is happening: Your subconscious brain is trying to get a message through to your penis to get ready for action and get erect or to stay erect. Fleeting and sometimes subliminal negative thoughts or worries are blocking those messages from getting through. Your brain is trying to call up your penis but it keeps getting an “engaged tone” and cannot get through. Because of passed ‘failures’ your brain has now gone into negative overdrive.

There is now a tried and trusted set of behavioral techniques that can overcome this in a matter of a week or so. These are so easy to apply. Discuss this with your girlfriend/partner; you need her understanding and cooperation.  

Here is how you can overcome performance anxiety:

• Agree with your sex partner to take intercourse off the menu altogether for several weeks.
• If you are not expected to “perform” then you can’t be anxious.
• Fondle and pleasure each other in any way you like but no intercourse. See to it that her needs are being met.
• Then sometime, when you have a good erection, she squats over you and places your penis into her vagina. She does all the grunting moving and shaking while you just lie there and do nothing. You are not “on duty”. You are “off call”. You are on holidays and have withdrawn all services. You need to be able to laugh at this as well. A good sense of humor is essential. This is only sex after all. Its not a life or death issue.
• Please show this to your sex partner so as she is in the picture. If you can’t share this with your partner then it’s not going to work.
• I know that this may not be easy for you and that you would love to find a “better” diagnosis and a “better” solution. I have known so many men get themselves into terrible knots trying to avoid what is after all eloquently simple. Take this quantum leap now and you will not regret it.

Once you get your confidence back your ED will go away. If you wish, or if the above does not seem to be working you can take some Cialis 20mg but it is better if you do not do this.

Here are some common myths about performance anxiety erectile dysfunction:

• It’s your own fault. It absolutely is not your fault. It might be someone else’s fault if someone said something nasty to you and striped you of your confidence. In the main however, it is usually nobody’s fault. It just happens. It only needs happen once to establish a cycle of negativity.
• It’s a sign of weakness. It is no such thing.
• It’s difficult to fix. Not so. It is easy to fix if you have a sense of humour and can share it with your partner.
• It does not spill over into masturbation. It does.

Dr Andrew Rynne.

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way off the beaten track!, BC