Hi F, One word, masturbating, but with you its 12 years of over masturbating< but you cant see it and yousay you cant sleep without it, there are no drugs that will help you, you are the only drug that can help you, start with a 8 week break from masturbating and any sexual contact, this is a way to beboot your body, so no porn, masturbating, no sex, and no foreplay, with the future wife.
Its either do this or you wont have much of a sex life with your wife in the future.
Come back to me in 8 weeks and let me no how things are going.
Good Luck