BFN this morning

I really wasn't expecting much. I mean, it's 10 dpo, and I'm 41 and have diminished ovarian reserve. I know it's not over till the witch shows her ugly self, but I'm not counting on anything. We will continue to try! I will do another round of Clomid and keep going to acupuncture. We have a telephone consultation on Monday with an adoption agency. It's good to get that process started. :0)

[stillwaiting52]

Yes, it is early Sue. I hope you get your BFP soon! I am 1 DPO now and am only doing 1 more round of Femara if this month doesn't work out. Are you also taking a trigger shot? Adoption is a great option though! Best wishes in however you get your child!!

[SueGre]

I'm pretty sure AF is coming in a day or two. My forehead always gets oily before she comes. Pg symptoms do mock AF symptoms, though...

I didn't do a trigger shot, as I O on my own and we didn't do IUI or anything. My RE said there's only a 3% difference between doing IUI and trying on our own.

It's funny, but before Rob and I even met, when I was much younger, I always thought I would adopt. I am adopted and one of my brothers is adopted and we have wonderful loving, supportive parents.I always thought it would be the route I would take.

I wish you a BFP very very soon!

[babyprayers]

why not try IVF with donor, I cannot imagine it would cost any more then adoption, I mean if you want the whole pregnancy thing, I used donor and got twins

[SueGre]

We would, but IVF is not guaranteed. With adoption, of course, you only pay if you get a baby. I would love to be pregnant again but it doesn't matter to me. Your twins, by the way, are gorgeous :0)

[rdh1981]

Oh man, this bites! But like you said it is still early!!! Hopefully you will get that BFP!! Congrats with going through with adopting!! Any child would be so lucky to have you and Rob as parents!!!

Cruz and I still have everything crossed!

[Helen72]

I wish we all had resources to cover all of our infertility treatments.
So sorry about bfn  :(

[SueGre]

Rachel - I'm just picturing Cruz crossing his tiny little fingers. So cute!

Helen - You and me both. It's okay about the BFN. It really is.

[anxious71]

I am so happy, after all that cramping, back aches, leg pain, and watery discharge continually, my day 14 has arrived and I just got my BETA results, positive.....I wish all you luck, and hope you can all feel what I am feeling today.....

[usuk]

I am excited to hear about Monday. I'm adopted too. Hope it's just you and Robert on the call. Tell Aunt Flo to go play cards at the senior center. Hang in there Sue.

[SueGre]

Hahaha! You totally crack me up! Thanks for that :0)

[SueGre]

I'm feeling pukey and my gums on the left side of my mouth is sore. I just bit down and it really hurt. I floss religiously every day. Also, I have a funky taste in my mouth.

[usuk]

That taste could be hormones. Especially if you took meds.

[SueGre]

I didn't know that. Interesting...

[babyprayers]

ahhh right you are sue... I pray often for you, someday it will come your way, you will see,

[SueGre]

Thank you so much. It will happen. I'm sure of it. One way or another, it will happen.

[SueGre]

Usually I get chilly before AF comes, but I am SO warm today. What's up with that? I just feel like total poo today. Blech.

[ita17]

Sue, I've only been around here for a few months now, so I may have missed this but, have you tried injectable's?  Even though for my 2 rounds I did not get  pg, I think your chances of conceiving at "OUR" age is a bit higher, because you will produce between 2-6 follies.  I was just wondering;)
I think it's great to adopt, & I TOALLY understand the whole IVF $$$$ thing.  There is NO guarantee;(  That would be really hard to spend a lot of $$$ & no baby.
But if you haven't already done so & if your not pg right now, try going a bit more aggressive.  It COULD make a difference;)

[mlb1234]

Sorry about the bfn but it's not over yet..my sister had a metallic taste in her mouth with all her pregnancies.  
Adoption is a wonderful thing too.  As a matter of fact my mom is meeting the son she gave up for adoption 47 years ago today for the first time!!!!!  Best of luck whatever you decide.

[LadyCB]

Awesome.  It's celebration time.  Congrats to you on a BFP.  I too hope for one soon.  My bloodwork takes place next Friday, October 30, 2009.

[prevatt77]

I had a metallic taste in my mouth also with all my pregnancies.  It's not over yet and being warm could be a good sign too.  Take your temp first thing tomorrow morning before you do anything (talk, get out of bed..etc) and see what it is, if it's higher it's a good sign.  Don't give up, I was 41 went I delivered my son and I had 5 miscarriages prior to him.  Follow your dream....

Debbie

[SueGre]

My insurance won't cover anything fertility-related since my E2 was too high a year ago. I found this out on my 41st birthday. My RE won't prescribe injectibles without being monitored and we would have to pay for everything out of pocket. We can't take the risk of just throwing all that money away. I'm not being negative, just realistic.

[kikicoates78]

Oh I totally had a metalic taste with Addy, I was eating steak with my girlfiend and thought it was bad, after she tasted it she Dx me with me being PG. LOL BUT it was 17dpo and I was very negative and well you know the ending!!!! I'm still totally syched for you! :)

[SueGre]

I totally think I'm imagining the taste. I don't have any sensitivity to smells or anything. I am having wicked reflux, but being overweight causes that, too. The only thing is, I'm SO WARM. I literally cannot cool off! I'm so physically uncomfortable today.

[mlb1234]

Many reproductive clinics have an option that if you do not get prego with so many IVFs you will get a portion of your money back for adoption.   Something you could think about.

[mommyin10]

Sorry about the bfn ;( but you're right! It ain't over til she shows her ugly face! I noticed mlb1234's comment & we did IVF through the Attain program, where you pay so much & they guarantee you 6 attempts. If you don't bring a baby home after all attempts, they give you 70% of your money back. Sounds like a win/win situation :) We did that & low & behold it worked the first time! Good luck w/ your consult! That is exciting :)

[SueGre]

I've seen the name Attain here before but don't know anything about it. Do they have a web site?

[SueGre]

What's with this dizziness I'm having? I do have a stuffed up nose from being sick last week, but I don't think my sinuses would make me dizzy like this, would they?

When I went to the bathroom a few minutes ago, I notice my wee-wee is very dry. It's usually that way when witchie-poo is on her way.

How annoying to have such conflicting symptoms!

[mommyin10]

Yes. The website is attainivf.com. Let me know if you have any questions :)

[A_Muse4u]

That does sound veRy encouraging.  I will check out that site too.  Is there an age limit?  Thanks.  

[SueGre]

Thank you!

[SueGre]

Thought I was dry, but now I feel wettish. And I'm super dizzy. I got up from my desk, turned to the right and actually lost my balance. Weird, huh?

mommyin10 - I just did the application on the attain site. I'm looking at the link they sent me. Thanks again.

[kerriebo]

Good luck with the adoption.  We just started the process too!  Just waiting to get our initial appointment scheduled with our case manager.  Are you going through a public or private agency?

[SueGre]

We're just in the very beginning stages of all this. We want to check out several agencies before we decide on one. Are you familiar with Adoption Network? We have a phone consultation with them on Monday. They claim to place babies in just a couple of months because of the extensive marketing they do. Have you chosen an agency yet?

Best of Luck!

[kerriebo]

I have heard of the Adpotion Network....  That is awesome if the turn around is only a few months.  We are going to LDS Family Services.  The average wait time for an infant is a year.  But, the adoption fees are based on your household income (10%, with a 4,000 minimum and 10,000 max).  We have been told really good things about the agency too...  We have only filled out paperwork.  We have to meet with our assigned case manager to move on in the process.  I am not sure how long the process takes, but they do some kind of investigation to make sure we have a good home and are good people, then we can get on the adoption list... from there it is a waiting game. :)

[SueGre]

I just checked their website. As you probably already know, they only adopt to those who are within their religious beliefs. I guess a Jewish woman and a Catholic man who have all the love in the world to give to a child are not good enough for them.

Nothing personal against you whatsoever. I wish you all the best :0)

[mommyin10]

A_Muse4u:  I don't know if there's an age limit. It is more expensive for those of us over 35, though. I found the reps to be very friendly & helpful! Good luck :)

Sue: You're welcome! Let me know how it goes :)

[SueGre]

Only one thing is giving me any hope for this month: my gums are sore. AF is due on Sunday.

[ita17]

I had to pay out of pocket too, my insurance does cover I have to be referred.  Anyway, I did 2 months, full monitoring, b/w & w/all my meds itcost about $2,200.00  one month we did IUI 2x's & that cost $250.00 each time....that was not worth it IMO, my hubbys count is great, so we could have saved $$$...but oh well...
I really think if your NOT pg this month, to at least do ONE cycle w/injectables, the cost is nowhere near IVF, & you never know;)

[SueGre]

Temp was 98.6 this morning. I don't really temp, but I thought that was good and high.
Another BFN this morning at 11 dpo. Seriously doubt I'm pregnant. We won't give up. I'll keep taking Clomid, go to acupuncture, and use OPKs. In the meantime, we're researching adoption and possibly attain ivf.

[Quinns momma]

Oh I am sorry... But that is a great temp. Heck, mine do not go that high even when pregnant so that is awesome.,  :)  Keeping my fingers crossed for you as always. :)
I really think you would benefit from IVF esp with your E2 levels.   Best of luck in whatever road you take. I know you will be a Mommy.

[SueGre]

I am so WARM! What is up with that?? I'm sitting here sweating and I live in Boston! It's not exactly warm or even mild here and yet I'm so hot. My temp was 98.6 this morning, but my test was a BFN. Maybe tomorrow I'll get my wish? Not counting on it :0(

[rdh1981]

Cruzy is still all crossed up for his Auntie Sue!!!! Don't give up yet!!!!!!

[SueGre]

Thanks, Cruzy-Wuzy! I love you!

[pertykitty]

i didnt get a bfp till i was 15 dpo so dont count it out just yet!

[SueGre]

Okay, I won't! ;0)

[A_Muse4u]

Thx.  I too filled out an ap.  O:-)

[SueGre]

GROSSSSSSS! I had a chicken salad wrap for lunch today. I'm burping it up and it smells like old salami! DH is grossed out!!! Ewwwwww!! Hee Hee Hee

[kikicoates78]

Dag nap it! I was SO wanting to see BFP, no worries, still early. :)

[scienceteacher79]

Still early Sue. Praying everyday days - multiple times a day (and in my sleep too, Dh says I keep talking :) Love you - hang in there!

[SueGre]

You and me both, sister. I'll test again tomorrow. 12 dpo is my do-or-die-day and that's tomorrow.

[SueGre]

As long as your Rob isn't saying my name in his sleep I think we're good. Thanks for all the prayers, sweet girl! I'm hangin' in!

[scienceteacher79]

HAHA! No, I don't think my rob is saying your name... that would be creepy! :)

[SueGre]

Jeez, maybe I am pregnant?? I have been so sleepy the last 3 evenings at like 7:00. It's a little after 7:00 and I swear I could go to bed for the night. And, my bbs are pretty sore. Usually my "symptoms" go away a couple of days before AF and she's due tomorrow. I don't frickin' know!!

[amy0013]

Sounds promising Sue!!  Eeeeeek!  Can't wait to read your update this morning!  :)

[SueGre]

Big Fat Effin' Negative this morning. I'm not surprised. It's just more of the same. AF is due today. My temp this morning was 98.5. I thought that was high for the day of AF. I don't feel her coming at all. I usually dry up before she arrives, but I'm wet. I usually have some sort of cramps, but I don't. I dreamed that I was PG AND had my period. So weird.

[amy0013]

Dang it...I know you place all your hopes on 12dpo...but it's REALLY not over yet!  You still have some different symptoms for your body.  Don't give up yet!

[SueGre]

I will not give up yet but I doubt I'm pregnant :0(

[usuk]

Hang in there Sue. Tomorrow is a big day :)

[SueGre]

I hope you're right!

[scienceteacher79]

Hang in there girly! It ain't over til its over!!! :) Love you!!

[Helen72]

Sigh.....  Hate bfn's!!!!!!!

[rdh1981]

Ugh!!! But not giving up yet!!!

[SueGre]

So excited. Rob and I are going on a "date" tonight! We're going to a yummy Mexican restaurant that we haven't been to in a while. Should be fun.

Still no sign of AF, but I'm sure she'll be here in a day or two.

Back to the drawing board :0)

[amy0013]

What a wonderful distraction.  :)  Enjoy yourself!

[SueGre]

It was really nice. The Mexican place was closed for the night so we went to an Irish pub. Rob taught me a bunch of stuff about the history of Ireland and we just had a really good time.

I anticipate getting Miss Flo soon because I've developed a whole bunch of zits. Gross! I don't have any more tests in the house so I'm just going to wait for her to show.

[SueGre]

I didn't have an HPTs in the house this morning so I used an OPK. There wasn't even a hint of a 2nd line. Oh, well. Temp was 98.6 again. I guess AF is just taking her ole time. Witch.

Have a great day!!!

[rdh1981]

I really hate the waiting game!!!!!!!

I am glad you and Rob had a great date!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[amy0013]

OPKs take longer to detect pregnancy than an HPT.  It doesn't mean anything that it was negative.  :)  Still excited for you...especially since AF didn't come yesterday when she was due!

[SueGre]

Oh! I didn't know that. I'll test again with a FRER tomorrow. I've got sharp cramps this morning, so I have a feeling she's around the bend. It's okay. It'll happen for us one way or another!

[Quinns momma]

I never get a positive OPK even when preggers. It is promising that your early morning temps are still so high.  ;)

[SueGre]

I really really really hope you're right, but I'm not terribly confident.

[pertykitty]

sue i was talking to a friend of mine last night.  one of her friends just adopted a baby boy.  she tried to get pg for many many years and was told it would never happen.  well that baby boy she adopted is now maybe  5 months and guess what?  she is pg!!  i have another friend that had one child early, like at 17.  she went 20 yrs without using b.c because her and her dh were told kids wouldnt happen (her dd was from another man).  she now has 2 more!! there are so many promising stories out there.  

i just wanted to share some hope ;)

[SueGre]

I just did a FRER. It was negative. It wasn't with FMU, but since my period is officially a day late, I would think it would show with any urine, right?

pertykitty: Thanks for sharing that. I love those stories.

[SueGre]

I just took our the test and looked at it under my desk. I work with all men in a tiny one-room office. It's past the time you should check it but I might might might see a very faint line. I'm not sure because the light under my desk *****. I think my eyes are just playing tricks on me. I'll go to the bathroom and look again.

This suucks.

[amy0013]

OMG REALLY?!?!  A FAINT LINE?!?!  SERIOUSLY!??!?!  Go check and post back!!!!!  HOLY POOOO!!!!!

[SueGre]

Nope. No line. The "line" kept moving so my eyes were definitely playing tricks on me. I'll try again tomorrow...

[usuk]

FRER is better than the others without FMU but you never know. I know this waiting is crazy. But if you do get AF, just know your mind is not playing tricks on you. Clomid changed me completely. Since I've taken meds, now my periods are a day shorter. I used to not get cramps until after my bleeding started now I get backaches, cramps, headaches, etc days before AF. It also gave me that metallic taste, it made me warm, carsick, lightheaded, etc. I'm going to start calling Clomid "Uncle Chuck" because he and Aunt Flo are my least favorite relatives.

[SueGre]

Uncle Chuck is awesome! I'm totally going to call Clomid that from now on!! I'll test again tomorrow, but I just don't have any hope for this cycle. Clomid has clearly delayed AF.

[SueGre]

I'm having pretty sharp cramps by my left ovary. I've had that around O time but not before AF. Weird. If she's going to show, then show already and don't make me wait!

[amy0013]

I'm not trying to give you false hope, just stating a fact...but Clomid USUALLY makes your af come wayyyy early...NOT LATE!!!  Am I right?  I am remembering some crazy early cycles for you last time you tried clomid...the late thing is different!!!  

[Mariana101]

Sue;
Im 41, from Cambridge MA.  We go though a lot with this fertility stuff. Im about to start my third IVF but don't have much hope to tell you the truth. They want to do four eggs. Crazy.  the thing is: my eggs are old, as simple as that.

Are you going to adopt? If you find a nice place let me know,,,, please..... Im clueless of how to go about this if we decide to adopt.

Thanks so much

Mariana

[naturschld]

Wishing you the best.  Hope AF stays away and you get a BFP!  Good luck.

[SueGre]

You are the BEST cheerleader, Amy! I know Clomid made my AF come early a couple of times, but doesn't it make most women's cycles longer? Also, I realize from hearIng a lot of stories here, that I could still get a BFP well after 13 dpo. I just don't feel that different. And I know that's silly because I didn't feel anything with Aidan until much later. Believe me, I want this more than ANYTHING, but I just don't think this is my month. I love you for being so enthusiastic for me! You're such a good friend. Still can't wait to see that girl of yours! How are you feeling these last couple of weeks?

[SueGre]

Thanks!!!

[SueGre]

Hi Mariana, I live in Brookline near Coolidge Corner.

This is a tough road we're traveling, isn't it? We are checking out some adoption places. I will gladly let you know what we find out, who we liked and who we want to steer clear of. Next Monday we have a phone consultation with Adoption Network. They claim to place babies in just a couple of months. I'll let you know how it goes.

Sue

[alikat1205]

I am always late with Clomid

[AmyG89]

I just wanted to wish you luck. I live on the South Shore in Holbrook.

[SueGre]

Dammit. I thought I saw a faint line tonight but Rob said he couldn't see anything. I really thought I saw one developing and then it just went away. I cracked open the test and looked and looked and thought there was a pink line, but there wasn't. There just wasn't. I'll test again tomorrow morning and then I'm done testing and will just wait for AF.

[Mariana101]

OMG!!!!! SUE!!!! Stop testing my friend... I remember seeing faint lines one day and nothing the other.. and kept asking myself: What the heck did I do to mess this up? Did I just became "unpregnant" all of the sudden? All the hormones we take affect our bodies so the results are not clear until MUCH latter!!!! But I totally understand what you are doing and I will probably do it at the end of November when I should be waiting for the results of my IVF!!!!  My husband was so sad last time and kept asking me not to do hpt but I couldn't help it!!! I would try to keep it quiet but my face was pretty obvious :( .
You know something, the sad part about this is that I am a very upbeat enthusiastic person, work with kids and families as a social worker/therapist and play all day..... this fertility thing afects me more than I give it credit for. Now, Im like: "Ok God.... Im trying to trust you.... don't make it so hard. i'm loosing my patience".

BTW, I have a 15 year old daughter and she is away in boarding school, loving it but I feel that I have an "empty nest" way too early.  She will be a great babysitter though... She is telling me to adopt, and help other children like I do every day:).

Try "La Casa de Pedro" is a Venezuelan restaurant in Arsenal Street, Watertown.... or Orinoco in Brookline Village I think..... they have another one in the South End... Im only saying this because I am from Venezuela and you wanted to go to a Mexican place the other night and ended up in an Irish Pub (Which I love btw,,, nothing like a good Guinness!!!! hahahhaah:)  so I though you can try my kind of food, not spicy like mexican but with tons of flavor!!!!!

Im talking way too much. Im going to go to bed now. Long day tomorrow.

Huggs to ya!

Mariana

[SueGre]

I just saw Orinoco last night for the first time and wondered what type of restaurant it was. Thanks for telling me about those two. We are always looking for new places to try. The place that was closed the other day was Sol Azteca. Do you know it? We love it.

You're so right that I should stop testing. It just becomes an obsession. I know you understand  this. I'm running a test right now but I have no hope left for this cycle. I know I'm probably not getting pregnant for 2 reasons: I'm 41 and have diminished ovarian reserve and I obsess every cycle. The first strike is probably remedied by acupuncture, the latter I don't know how to deal with. I've got to reroute my thoughts. I'm not sure how to do this. I wish we could go on vacation for a whole week right when I O!

You just did IVF? Best of luck! I hope you and I are new mommies very very soon.

Sue

[SueGre]

C'mon AF! Let's go already! I hate this being in limbo. She's already 2 days late. I hope this isn't one of those cycles where she's like 2 weeks late. I have acupuncture tomorrow. I just *love* telling my acupuncturist every cycle that I'm NOT pregnant again. I'm sleepy, I have a headache even though I took Tylenol, my bbs hurts, my lower back hurts and I'm having cramps on my lower left side.

Can you tell I don't feel well today???

Blech.

[Mariana101]

Hi Sue,

Im starting the injections this Thursday, then my first eco is next Monday, the retrieval is Monday Nov 9 and transfer is Nov 12 if my dates are right. Im kind of an "expert" calculatig my dates unfortunatelly. So wish me luck.


Have you tried Yoga? .... I do power yoga at the Baptiste Studio in Cambridge, they have one close to you. I can only do that in between cycles, not when doing IVF because is a hot room, but I do some yoga at home. I did acupuncture last time and it did not work so I got disappointed. I know acupuncture is good but I had to pay a bit more than $50 a session so Yoga is MUCH cheaper. My hope this time is that bacause I'm not that hopefull maybe I won't be too stressed out and it will happen:) hhahahahhah.... Life is weird :)

BTW, I have random cramps as well...... I started noticing them more after my last invitro.... I think we get more sensitive to our body sensations but they probably were there all along, we just never notice them before.... but let me tell you I think I would have noticed them since they feel quite weird,,,, it's like the side of my tummy shakes like a little earthquake!!! hahhahaha!!!!.

I have never being at Sol Azteca. Is that the one on Washington square?. We love trying out new places as well.

I just got home to do some work in the computer and The Tyra Show is talking about fertility OOOMMMGGGG!!!!! It's EVERYWHERE..... and I see a million babies a day!!!!!! they are enerywhere as well..... hahhahaahaaha:) Talking about being a bit sensitive about all this, ah?!!!!

Im so glad we have this forum..... we understand eachother and it's ok to just write it all down..... :) sort of :)

Have a good rest of the day

Mariana

[SueGre]

Ugh. I have a feeling AF is going to come really late like it did once over the summer. I just don't feel like she's anywhere near. So annoying. If I'm not pg, then just come already. I want to start another round of Clomid and I just hate this in between nonsense.

[Mariana101]

I know you hate this nonsense!!!!! IT'S SOOOOO awfullllll :(  and today is such a windy cold day!!!! Oh boy!!!!

I just got candy for Holloween.  Crazy night with kids though. There will be plenty of hyperactive children around my neighborhood but guess what Sue? they will go back to their homes and we will be sleeping peacefully with our hubbies and our sweet dogs:) Thank God for DOGS!!!! BTW, Your is so cute. I have a very cute Maltese named Teddy!!!! He is the best.

I am sending you a "wireless" hot cocoa, so drink it, wear something warm and cozy and tomorrow is another day!!!, it's not that bad after all.

I never ask you.... have you ever done IVF? Clomid won't do much for you, at least it hasn't for me. We are a bit "older" so IVF is "better". This *****:(

Let me know when you try Orinoco:) You guys will love it!

[NO1critter]

Have you taken a pg test again over the last couple of days?