Not fair

[BellaMarie84]

I just wanted to talk about something I saw last night on a show called "I didn't know I was pregnant." On the show there was a lady taking birth control every day and at the same time. She and her husband were also older... she looked like she was in her 40's and he was in his 50's or 60's. They didn't even want a baby at all. Then she found out she was pregnant and about to deliver. The show was about the woman going through 39 weeks or pregnancy and not even knowing because she was a more heavyset woman and not showing many symptoms. Even her blood test was negative. I just wanted to vent because to me this is so unfair and made me cry. I am TTC and im not on birth control. Me and my fiance both want a baby very bad and im a healthy 25 year old. I don't smoke, i take prenatal vitamins and I have been TTC for 5 years.I have very irregular periods but I was pregnant when I was 19 but had an abortion. Am I just being punished for giving up my first pregnancy? It was the right thing to do at the time but now I don't know what else to think. Im glad I can talk to people on here, it helps.

[kristleclear]

i completely understand how you are feeling!  My husband and I have been ttc for 3 years now.  i have done 5 cycles of clomid, had a lap, and had my first iui on 7/8.  It seems everyone around me is getting preg!  when is it going to be my turn?  My brother and sister-in-law told me last week they were pregnant and for the life of me, i am not happy for them, i am sorry, but i am not!  they were only trying for one month!  its not fair!  i can't figure out why god would let people that are mean and hateful and who do horrible things to their children, let those people have children and not me?  what did i do to deserve this?  i am going to just give up and become the weird cat lady.

[kristleclear]

i completely understand how you are feeling!  My husband and I have been ttc for 3 years now.  i have done 5 cycles of clomid, had a lap, and had my first iui on 7/8.  It seems everyone around me is getting preg!  when is it going to be my turn?  My brother and sister-in-law told me last week they were pregnant and for the life of me, i am not happy for them, i am sorry, but i am not!  they were only trying for one month!  its not fair!  i can't figure out why god would let people that are mean and hateful and who do horrible things to their children, let those people have children and not me?  what did i do to deserve this?  i am going to just give up and become the weird cat lady.

[kristleclear]

i completely understand how you are feeling!  My husband and I have been ttc for 3 years now.  i have done 5 cycles of clomid, had a lap, and had my first iui on 7/8.  It seems everyone around me is getting preg!  when is it going to be my turn?  My brother and sister-in-law told me last week they were pregnant and for the life of me, i am not happy for them, i am sorry, but i am not!  they were only trying for one month!  its not fair!  i can't figure out why god would let people that are mean and hateful and who do horrible things to their children, let those people have children and not me?  what did i do to deserve this?  i am going to just give up and become the weird cat lady.

[kristleclear]

i completely understand how you are feeling!  My husband and I have been ttc for 3 years now.  i have done 5 cycles of clomid, had a lap, and had my first iui on 7/8.  It seems everyone around me is getting preg!  when is it going to be my turn?  My brother and sister-in-law told me last week they were pregnant and for the life of me, i am not happy for them, i am sorry, but i am not!  they were only trying for one month!  its not fair!  i can't figure out why god would let people that are mean and hateful and who do horrible things to their children, let those people have children and not me?  what did i do to deserve this?  i am going to just give up and become the weird cat lady.

[kristleclear]

i completely understand how you are feeling!  My husband and I have been ttc for 3 years now.  i have done 5 cycles of clomid, had a lap, and had my first iui on 7/8.  It seems everyone around me is getting preg!  when is it going to be my turn?  My brother and sister-in-law told me last week they were pregnant and for the life of me, i am not happy for them, i am sorry, but i am not!  they were only trying for one month!  its not fair!  i can't figure out why god would let people that are mean and hateful and who do horrible things to their children, let those people have children and not me?  what did i do to deserve this?  i am going to just give up and become the weird cat lady.

[BabyBlue07]

You are not alone.  each of us in this forum struggle to have a baby.  GOD does not
punish anyone at all.. Just it's not time yet...Everything happen for a reason..

Now we are talking about medical... Since you already have one abortion.. the scar will be in your uterus... Your case might be harder than any one who never has an abortion.  

If you have trouble to conceive.. talk to the specialist... they will have the way to help you get pregnant...maybe it's not you but might be your fiance. both of you need to have checkout to see both of you are fertility.  

Life isn't fair... Each day you can hear the news about new born dump in the trash... leave to death in the cold.. etc... all you can do is keep praying and one day God will grant you little one..

Don't give up hope... seek help from medical provider... they know what best for you..

Good luck to you.

[GiGiGiGi]

My husband wont let me watch that show anymore because it really ticks me off.  I find it really hard to believe that a woman can have a 7 lb baby inside of her and not know it.  Plus none of those people have pre-natal care and there is nothing wrong with their babies... go figure.  I guess seeing babies with disabilities is not good for ratings.  I think that show just might encourage irresponsibility - people watching will see all these healthy babies and think "well, she smoked and drank all through her pregancy and her baby is fine".

You are definitely NOT being punished for having a pregnancy terminated.  God does not work that way, my dear.  This is just a little speedbump in the grand scheme of things, and you will have your family - it just takes some of us a little longer than others.  

Can I ask if you have spoken to your doctor about this? Since you have been trying for 5a long time, why not make a doctor appointment to see what's going on?    Your doc can do some simple bloodwork to get a basic idea of what is going on with you.  Maybe a SA would be a good idea for your fiance?

I am sorry that you are having a rough time.  Just know that you are not alone, and stop watching that darn show!

Take care,

Gigi