Religion and IVF????

[babygirl_garcia]

This is just a HUGE question that probably brings up controversy but I need to hear some opinions!

I have PCOS and have been ttc for 4 years now with no luck obviously.  I tried the hormone shots for two months but could not concieve or afford a third month.  The more months go by with no baby and my husband graduates from paramedic school in May 2008, we are wanting to REALLY start trying again with our RE in San Antonio, since we will be more financially stable.

So my problem is....I am a religious woman that, first of all, wants to know what I did wrong that God doesn't want me to have children at this time in my life (or possibly EVER)  I already felt weird about the 2 months of IUI with hormone injections, because me and my husband were not being able to make love and concieve in a normal way..you know what I mean???  With him having to feel uncomfortable about making a sperm deposit in the office because we lived 2 hours from the office.  Well, I just have to face the reality of it and many women get PG and have happy families using IVF, but I really don't understand IVF I suppose...because I thought they take a bunch of your eggs and fertilize them right away with your husband's sperm (or donor sperm) and THEN freeze the ones you don't use.  So is that right???  You have fertilized eggs in a freezer?  I am not critisizing, I am just trying to learn how it works, because I want to feel comfortable if I have to resort to IVF.  I have always felt that once the egg is fertilized it was a baby in the process of growing into a miracle ( I know many don't feel this way and that is fine...this is just my oppinion.) So my concearn is that I would be leaving all those little unborn babies a freezer if I never use them all...does this make sense. Like I said, I don't know how they do it...maybe they just take the eggs freeze them....that would make more sense...I just don't know and would like to hear from someone that KNOWS what they are talking about.  

Sorry for the long forum....but this is the one thing I've always needed to let off my chest and discuss with anyone. Thanks so much!  Merry Christmas and God Bless all of you ttc or anyone that is pg already!!!!!

[babygirl_garcia]

Thanks for all of your comments, I will take them all to heart!  To wishing4#2, I'll pray for the health and safety of you and your 4 babies!!!  Yeah, I hope it happens for you this time!!!

[wishing4#2]

I struggled with the decision to do IVF for the same reasons.  I didn't want all these frozen babies.  So I just asked my RE to try not to overstimulate me to produce too many eggs.  That way we would be able to use all our frozen ones.  I didn't want to have any left.  So i put 2 embryos in with the fresh IVF, and froze 4.  Unfortunately I m/c after IVF.  January I am doing FET and we are thawing all 4 embryos, hopefully 3 will make it for transfer.  So i feel completely at peace with God about my decision.  I don't think it was wrong.  If people are telling you that IVF is wrong or anything, it is their own battle with God, it shouldn't have to involve you.  God made man with minds to think and help themselves.  He wants us to have children. But also just because this was my decision doesn't mean it is right for everyone.  You have to feel at peace about your own decision.  
Good luck with your decision.  

[pcarsey]

I agree with Tina! Also- God would never ever judge you for giving life to a baby through whom ever is the lucky one, using your eggs or not.

[tina1111]

My philosophy is, and has always been, God helps those who help themselves. We were told to be fruitful and multiply. There wasn't an asterisk that excluded certain situations.

The frozen embryos that are not used should not be discarded like trash imo. They are actual real babies just waiting for a womb. This subject has come up a few times over the yrs on this forum. It seems the general consensus has been to donate them to another couple that cannot use their own. Kind of like putting them up for adoption. What greater gift is there than to give a childless couple a baby?