I am a mother of one from a previous relationship. me and my fiance want to have a baby of our own. we are getting married in October and would like to conceive shortly after that. Lillian is 2 and we don't want her to be too much older than her younger sibling. the problem is my fiance had complications at birth where one of his"boys" didn't drop and had to be surgically reattached. How do i know if he is fertile or not? do we need to see a doctor? please help we really want a family of our own
hey there! my dh had the same problem, except both of his "boys" didn't drop & he didn't end up having surgery until he was about 6. the same thing happened to his younger brother, but his brother's situation was the same as your dh's...1 of his "boys" didn't drop. anyways, the 1st thing he has to do is have a semen analysis to check for sperm count, morphology, & motility. based on that it can be decided whether or not your dh has any issues. chances are he does b/c testicles not dropping when they are supposed to cause fertility issues. we have to do ivf w/ icsi. we've had 2 cycles...1st was a bfp but ended in a m/c & the 2nd was a bfn. we'll be starting our 3rd cycle in august. for the 2nd cycle, dh actually had to have a procedure called tesa (surgically remove sperm from testicle) & will be having the same thing in august..poor thing. i feel really bad b/c dh feels like it's his fault that we can't have a baby the easy way...but the way i look at it is that i married him for him & not his sperm, lol! you & dh need to sit down & have a serious conversation & you need to be very sensitive about his feelings. he is probably nervous & scared...men tend to bottle up & ignore things, hoping they'll get better.
Although children are a blessing, I believe that waiting is a more prudent decission. I have 3 children from my previous marriage and I've been married to my current husband for 8 years now. And although we do want children, I've felt that my relationship with him is stronger. I know that he and I are together, not for the sake of the children, but because we love each other. My children are older now and living with their father. My husband and I travel all over the world and I'm so happy that God gave us that time to really test our relationship together. You know children grow up and leave you, and all you'll have is your husband. What will your relationship without the children be like? No one really knows, but give yourselves some time for fun, and if you see that you are both a compatible couple then try.. As for how to know if he's sterile or not. An IVF doctor can test the sperm count and motility.. :o) Wish you the best of luck always..
thank you ya i kinda want to wait but at the same time i am also ready for more he is defiantly ready b/c he wants some before he is 30.. he wants to enjoy them and watch them grow he lost his dad at 13 and he was a late in life child so he does not want that for them. so we have had to compromise on some of these issues we were talking about just letting things happen but we also want to know if we need help when we really start to try and we want to be prepared for anything.... i would marry him no matter what if we have to adopt we will my mother was adopted and i am pro adoption.. he was also adopted but his bio history is unknown and we worry there are things similar to his adopted fams history due to his own med history so far
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