jerky dr told me there was no point bothering doing fertility treatments when it was clear they weren't going to work because my body is "so messed up"

yes, those were his words.  It wasn't my doctor, because he's on vacation this week, but the other very old doctor in his practice (who clearly lacks any bedside manner) and is retiring in two months.  I just broke down crying when he said it, and all he did was give me a tissue, wrap up the conversation and left.  

There was so much other bad $hit that went on in that appt I can't even bring myself to write about it all in my usual explicit, overly detailed manner :o) but I'm just devastated.  They think my constant urgency to pee is due to endometriosis growing on my bladder, which means it won't go away until I have surgery.  I just got an AMAZING job offer yesterday - and I need to be normal again.  I'm going off the stupid FEMCON bcp they put me on after only a week, because it's giving me awful headaches.  He's trying to tell me my only other option is a stronger pill that will probably affect me worse, or depoprovera, where I'd have to wait a year and a half AFTER stopping taking it to TTC again!  That year and a half sort of defeats the purpose of taking the pill to regulate my PCOS and endometriosis to make it better conditions for me to TTC, when I know A LOT can happen in a year and half!  That's when he said "well there's really no point in you doing these fertility treatments when they are clearly not going to work because you are so messed up inside"  HOW DO I FIX THAT!!!!   ISN'T THAT YOUR JOB!!!   There's 50 million types of bcp's out there - you're telling me depo is my ONLY other option??!!!  WTF!!  He says because I need a strong, monophasil type to prevent cyst formation, and what I was taking was pretty much the lowest dose for that purpose - anything else would have to be stronger.

And now I just have to HOPE that this constant urgency to pee was just some random, unheard of side effect of the Femcon that will disappear when I stop taking it.  Otherwise, it don't look good.

Not happy...

I knew when I got this amazing job offer yesterday, which I accepted based on the thought that I was going on the pill to hopefully regulate myself for a while and just be NORMAL for TWO FRICKEN SECONDS!!!  - I knew it would be too much to ask for everything to go OK at the dr today and for me to hear what I was hoping/expecting to hear.

[40smama]

I'm so sorry that the doctor whom you had to see had a bedside manner straight from heck!  Is he a reproductive endocrinologist?  I'm guessing from your post that he is - what a jerk!

That being said, I'd wait to see what your regular dr says about the Femcon.  I had a slight case of endometriosis that went unchecked so I never went through any treatment for it so don't know much about that part.

I just know that no doctor should say that kind of cr@p to a patient - this makes me so angry!  I hope you can see your regular dr soon & get this sorted out if at all possible and congrats on your job - I hope things go better for you quickly!

[Arlotheslug]

That Dr is just wrong!  I think you need a new Dr!  That is just aweful.  I am sorry.

[leighanne143]

wait til your doctor gets back and talk to him.  there are so many other strong monophasial types of BCP's that you could take.  that man was an old quack eho had his head up his you know what.

hang in there and shcedule an appointment with your doctor asap.

[scienceteacher79]

Someone apparently peed in that old guy's Cherrios! UGH! What a freakin jerk! Tattle on him to your original doc when he gets back. There are always other options - don't fret. He is a jerk and he will get what is coming to him. Karma is a wonderful thing... Good luck sweetie!

[kele1129]

I think I would hav gotten up and walked out, paper robe be dammned! There was no excuse for him to speak to you like that.  I am sorry you had to go through that.

[MamaTina89]

OK, hold on!!! That sounds like the 1st RE we saw!!!! LOL LOL   Yeah, he told me to look at egg donation and NEVER bothered to try any meds and told me and I quote...."When you eggs are done, they are done! SO deal with it!"  I was like WTF are you kidding me?!?!??!?  So, the point of my story is GET ANOTHER DOCTOR ASAP!!!!!
We did and my eggs/ovaries are just fine ,just my eggs need a kick to pop out BUT THEY ARE THERE!!! :) I would have went off on him!! How F'ing rude!! Chin up sweetie!!!

[ALT76]

Thanks for the comments ladies!  Scienceteacher - you are hilarious!

It's actually my OBGYN's office.  Like I said, this guy isn't my doctor and I don't think my doctor would EVER say anything like that to me.  My insurance only paid for 5 referrals to my RE, so I haven't been there since I stopped the treatments.  What I like about his office is that they will give me an u/s on the spot, done BY THE DR and tell me what they see IMMEDIATELY.  Since I've had 3 ovarian cysts in less than two months, that is HUGE for me!  

I know they said that a triphasil pill isn't strong enough in the beginning to prevent cyst formation, but I was on Ortho Tri-Cyclen for many years with no problem.  It was when I stopped taking it 7 years ago that I started packing on the weight and everything hit the fan and started going downhill.  It seemed to work just fine for me then, and I wasn't even taking Metformin then.  I don't understand why I can't at least TRY it again.  I think if I can get anything into my system that it will be enough to help my hormones straighten out and help the cysts.  I also think that we just moved, I was job hunting, and we've been spending weekends fixing up our house, in a mad rush to get it on the market.  All sources of tremendous stress, because now we are paying a mortgage AND rent, plus electric and gas on both places!  I think the stress was what activated my PCOS and all these cysts, and I just found a job and we are just about done working on the house and ready to get it on the market after about 2 more weekends of work, so that will be done soon too!  I think that by November (which is about when I'd be starting a new pill), everything should be much more stress free and that should help too, so maybe I can get away with the ortho-tricyclen.  

I'm gonna talk to MY doctor and I'm sure he will have no problem trying anything I want to do.

[ALT76]

I can't believe your RE said that!  what is wrong with these doctors!!  what an A-hole!

[Maria2707]

I am sorry to hear what you are going through. You have PCOS and they didn't put you on Metformin?? I have PCOS too and I am on 1500mg per day metformin . This has helped me to get rid of my cysts. I was on BCP and metformin. Now I am on IVF cycle and I just take metformin.

Let me tell you this. I was at the doctors place for u/s sometime back . It was different doctor and not my RE doing the scanning. She looks at me and looks at my file in her hand  and says.."Your file is becoming thicker and thicker that's not good..you should have been out of here by now" I was so upset. Is it my fault?? I didn't know what to say. When I met my RE I told her what happened. She asked me not to worry.

So dear, there may doctors like that ..you just have to let it filter and try to be happy and positive. Talk to your doctor about Metformin if you are not taking now. Good luck.

[ALT76]

thanks - I have been on  metformin for over two years now, I just wasn't on it back in my early 20's when I was previously taking the pill, because I wasn't even diagnosed then.  Back then, even without knowing about PCOS or taking metformin, I was fine.  I take the extended release form called Glumetza - 2000mg/day

thanks though

[Helen72]

This old fart obviously did not read your history!  YOu went through ivf, you responded REALLy well to stims and you produced very high quality embryos.  There is nothing wrong with you!!!!  You just need a bit of luck with implantation.  

Sorry about possible endo.  That's a nasty problem.

[ALT76]

helen -
thanks for the reminder!  You're right!  Dammit!  Uh, I also got pregnant after my VERY FIRST (and only) IUI after my lap - just didn't stick...  jerky!  Many women who don't even have fertility issues lose their first pregnancies that early.  And I think the only reason the IVF that I did next didn't work was because I got an infection with a fever and they had to switch my antibiotics, so I just don't think conditions were ideal inside for it to take.  And they DO always tell me that I respond VERY WELL to the meds... A-hole!  (not you, him!) :o)

How could I have gotten that close if there's no hope for me!?!

[Maria2707]

I was taking Glucophage XR and it would never stay in my stomach. I used to see all the tablets in the toilet next day. I called the doc and informed her about it. I did my own test. I put the tablet in the glass of water for four days and that did not dissolve at all... It was hard as stone. I dont know what to get out of that. Finally doctor put me on regular glucophage.. Its better now.

[miky72]

I cannot believe he had the  nerve to tell you this.What a JERK!
I agree with Helen there is nothing "messed up" with you that a good doctor cannot fix.
ARRRRGGGGGGGG (i'm so angry!!!!)