Anal leakage and pain after perianal abcess(abscess)

I'm new here, so hi! I'm so glad I found this website, so maybe you guys can help me. I'm young, and never really had any health problems at all, till last year, right before christmas time, I went to a clinic cause I was crying in pain, from what I thought was a hemmoroid. The lady demanded I go to a general surgeon, and already scheduled me appt. across town that day. He said I had a perianal abcess (abscess), and lanced it, and seriously, i almost fainted I was in so much pain. The local shot was half the pain and it was supposed to help! I was screaming and crying and after it was done, I didn't feel much of a difference, I was taped up with bandages down there and just in shock. I went home relaxed a week came back and he said it was healing how it should. Weeks later, I was still bleeding, and still in a little pain. I thought it was cause everytime I poop, maybe it stretched out and can't heal properly? He made me go to his office right away and said he needed to lance it again, I had to go under because I told him I couldn't take the pain. I figured maybe he can get a better look at it if i was under too, so I woke up, for a week he had me pack my wond at home, now I don't know how someone that wasnt a nurse could do that, cause at first I tried to get my boyfriend to do it, and I just couldnt stop moving i was in pain and scared he was going to hurt me, he's never packed a wond before, so luckly my aunt (who is a nurse) did it. Mind you, it wasnt big AT ALL! TINY! like a tiny pimple kinda, so i went back and i was still in pain and he said give it some time to heal.... I'm still not healed, and when I had surgery it was in like march. He told me to call him if I was still bleeding in a month, but I think I should get a different opinion. I think there is something seriously wrong with me, cause when I poop, like harder poops, after wards I feel like someone was ramming something in my butt that was huge, like its SOREEE! I know that sounds sick, and I'm not trying to be perverted, but I dont know any other way to explain it. Does he even know what he is doing since he is a general surgeon? Should I go to a different doctor? What kind of doctor? Have any of you been through this? Like right now, I can barely sit cause I'm in so much pain... I just want to feel normal again =( ALSO its the same place both times I have had surgery, so I'm not getting mulitple abcesses, so I'm pretty sure I dont have chrons. =( I dont know my family history either.

[Weffette]

Hello,  I'm sorry to hear of the tremendous discomfort you are having. I am not a med pro but have had fissures and hemorrhoids in the past and can relate, to a certain extent.
A couple of questions for you...Did this surgeon put you on any antibiotics? Did he prescribe any type of suppository to help with pain? Are you taking any kind of stool softener? Who referred you to this surgeon? Have you had a colonoscopy or endoscopy of the rectum?
The ONLY thing I can suggest is for you to see a Gastroenterologist. They specialize in the digestive system, including the colon and rectal area.
My daughter once had  a couple of deep cysts (not in her rectum) and once lanced and packed...she had to return 3 times a day for a week for intravenous antibiotics. I would think that because of the location of your wound and the recurrance of it becoming swollen and infected, you should be closely watched and put on a high dose of antibiotics at frequent intervals. Please contact your primary care doctor and let them know whats going on. Request an appointment with a gastroenterologist and a possible colonscopy or endocsopy.
Also...FIBER FIBER FIBER!!!  NO nuts of any kind and eat alot of veggies and fruit.  If that doesn't help or you need to get quicker results, get a good stool softener!    NOT LAXATIVES.  I use MiraLax..its a 7 day regiment...or use as needed, tasteless powder...clear once disolved that can be put in water or juice. Take it at night and by morning you should have a soft BM. Keep your perianal area clean, maybe wear a pad, changing it often. If possible...wear very loose clothing and let the area "breath".  
Getting a kids little swimming tube could help while sitting too, cheaper than buying the "ring" at a health care store.
I wish you the best in your healing...but you need to seek a different opinion if you keep getting infections and needing this thing lanced again and again.
Good Luck and get better!!
Weffette