I'm brazilian and I'm 27 y/o.
My life is ruined.
I always had a great stomach, I don't throw up since I was like 4 years old I think, and since I can remember I have always been afraid of vomiting too.
I started to feel sick 2 years ago, december 2007 while I was living in the States, I started to feel dizzy and then nauseous.
At first, it was not something that avoided me to do things, like keep doing the regular things in my life, but once I got back to Brazil in february of 2008, I started to feel really nauseous everyday, then really dizzy, sometimes I didn't feel nauseous for like 1, 2 or even 3 weeks, but then, it all came back.
I went to several doctors (went to a hospital in the US and lots of doctors here in Brazil).
I went to a gastroenterologist, did a endoscopy, and the doctor said that it was
an infection somewhere on the way out of the stomach, prescribed me some medicine, I took it for some months but it didn't help at all.
I even went to an eye doctor thinking that it could be something wrong with my eyes, but it was all normal, actually I went to two eye doctors.
I went to a neurologist and he told me that I had General Anxiety disorder and asked me to look up online for some stuff and see if I wanted to take meds for it, but after a long research, I decided not to because of all the side effects and just because I really don't like to intoxicate my body with medicine.
I started to have panic attacks everytime I leave home, even going to have a haircut, anywhere, anytime, it's terrible.
My life has been ruined because of all this.
I don't even go out anymore, unless it's necessary.
Even just by seeing people, talking to people makes me dizzy and nauseous.
Most of my friends knows about this so they don't even come to visit me anymore because I feel sick.
And of course, my family is deeply concerned about my situation but they have no idea on how to help me anymore.
Some people tell me that it's all emotional, which I also strongly believe too, I think that most of our illness are caused by unbalanced thoughts and emotions.
Each doctor says something different, I went to a ear/nose/throat doctor and she said that I might have vertigo or even labyrinthitis, prescribed me a medication for it and I'm taking it for more than a month already but it's not helping.
I've lost 22 pounds the past 2 years, most of the time I don't even feel worth living anymore, I constantly think about dying because living like this is like being dead, this is not a life.
I know that this is highly linked with anxiety but I definitely do not want to take strong medication for it.
So I feel like my life is in this terrible cycle that I just don't seem possible to get out of.
The thing is, I can't even go out anymore even for a doctor's appointment (one more out of lots) because even going to a clinic or something makes me very nervous and the panic attacks starts happening, it's terrible.
I don't even feel like eating anymore because everything I eat makes me very nauseous and I hate the feeling of being sick.
I also always had a lot of gas (flatulence) all of my life and I never burped. I don''t know if this could be related.
I just want to have a normal life again, actually I want a my life back.
I'm 5'10" and I''m weighting miserable 103 pounds.
During all of this 2 years, I've been doing lots of researches online to find any help, any light, but nothing really concrete to this very moment.
I just want to find a "cure" for this so I can completely heal myself
If anyone can help me in any way I would highly appreciate!
Anything that shows me a light in the end of this infinite tunnel will be good!
Sorry for my english btw.
Thanks for taking your time to read this!
I forgot to mention that I'm also a smoker and with all this stress I've been smoking much more, I know it's not good, but sometimes it helps with the anxiety.
And that I also do not drink alcohol, just used to drink a little before, but never had anymore because of all this stuff and fearing that I could throw up.
My diet has been very restrict because once again, everything I eat makes me nauseous. Especially during the night. (I spend all nights awake, doing research and trying to occupy my mind with something).
I used to take some "recreational drugs" in the past, like ecstasy and marijuana, I don't know if that could be part of the problem, probably related with anxiety.
Thanks once again.
The first thing to do which will help is to stop the research! If one person out of a million experiences a side effect from medication the drug companies have to list it, but this doesn't mean you will experience that side effect. The other medications you've taken have side effects but you didn't think twice about taking them, and this is no different. ANXIETY IS A REAL condition, not something you can handle alone. I've been on these types of medications for many years and they gave me back my life. You are talking about not wanting to live any longer, yet you won't even give the medications a chance? You put ecstasy in your body but won't take something that is legal and under the care of a physician? Please visit the Anxiety Forum and see how so many others are dealing with this. Sometimes therapy will help, and you may be able to ease a lot of your anxiety with that. You're obcessed with something being wrong with you while refusing to do what is needed to help what really is the problem. This thinking is feeding your anxiety. Anxiety causes many physical symptoms in varying degrees, it is a real condition and you need to concentrate on getting better. You have a clean bill of health, your ONLY problem is anxiety. You are wasting away, while refusing help, I'm sure you can see this. There are so many people on medication for anxiety all around you, you'd be surprised to know how many. Don't allow this fear of medication stop you from taking it. It is your only answer and it WILL help you. You have a choice here, you can choose to fight back by taking the needed medication or you can spend your life in fear, nausea, and being miserable. You sound very bright, do what you need to do and take back your life. I speak from many years of experience, so I do understand. Stop looking for things that aren't there and fix what is wrong. You can and must do this. There are so many of us that have been where you are, and the few people that may experience some side effects of these medications are few compared to the thousands who are able to live a happy, productive life as a result of them. Visit the anxiety forum and read some stories so you can see for yourself. Don't allow this fear and obcession paralyze you from having a life. Take care...
This is EXACTLY what i experience EVERY...SINGLE...DAY. Have been through EVERYTHING you have said, it was like reading my own thoughts. Im really struggling too. Nausea every day. Vertigo/dizziness/lightheadedness all worsening...and YES going anywhere outside of the house makes me panicky. But it is BECAUSE i feel so physically off-balance and unwell. I am scared to be somewhere i cant lie down if i need to, and to have everybody see. It is hugely embarassing. I look pretty normal for a 27yr old girl because i still exercise to try and maintain some sense of normailty, dignity and pride. So people assume i am ok. Im not. Im dying inside but there's only so many demeaning doctors appointments you can attend, with no answers, before you just give up. And resign to living a life confined to the walls of your home. NOONE would choose to live this way. NOT even someone with anxiety/depression (which, yes...that has been the diagnosis time and time again for me too)... No. I am depressed and anxious BECAUSE i feel this way ALL the time. NOT the reverse. Im sure you can relate to this and feeling judged by pretty much everyone. "lazy" "depressed" "doesnt want to work" "all in her head". All such harsh judgements for someone already suffering so much. But I no longer have the strength to try and convince people otherwise. It gets beaten out of u after a while. Dont give up. Im not. Hell, i want to...so badly...but im not. Im determined to figure this out...not to accept the label of Chronic Fatigue Syndrome. Im determined to show people that i never wanted this life, never asked for it or deserved it. I wasnt just looking for attention. That is the last thing ive ever wanted. I just want answers and to be physically able to lead a normal life again. I know you do too. I know this post was a long time ago now but if you're still able to read this response, please know im here if u need to chat online. Ive experienced everything uve said, first-hand. And i know the pain all too well
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