sphincterotomy help, please

Hi every,
I am new to this board. So this is my story... I had developed an anal fissure back in 2008 and Ive used ointments which worked and relieved all pain, however, the fissure would come back now and then, and when it does come back the pain last for at least 4 weeks. Then I developed an abscess and so i went to the ER and they drained it. However, the abscess would form at least 2-3 times per month but pops on its own. I went to see the CRS and he said that i because of my anal fissure it formed a fistula which caused the abscess to keep forming. He said its either living with this or to perform a sphincterotomy. I chose to get the surgery, but I am so afraid right now. I fear of the pain afterwards, pain with the BM afterward, and incontinence. For those who had the same experience as I am having, can you please tell me your experience? Should I take this surgery or just live with the on and off pain of the fissure and abscess? Please, any help or suggestions are greatly and sincerely appreciate it.
ryan