I just lost my father on March 18th 2012. This has been one of the hardest times of my life. I was his caregiver as well. I worked full time but took FMLA to take him to chemo etc. I was at the hospital everyday and in the long term care facility just as much. My kids and I were well known because we "lived" there with him. I am angry and so sad. My emotions go from one extreme to the other at times and I am in such a depression right now. One thing that has helped, is my kids. I always told Daddy that I didn't think I would be able to live on when he passed and he always told me that my children would get me through. He was right but it still hurts so damn bad. .
I am so glad you spent all that time time with him. I am sure that meant so much to him and to you and your family. Time is precious. I am so sorry for your loss. My best friend also lost her father (just 1 yr ago) and it has been so difficult for her. She spent so much time with him and was with him every step of the way. You are a wonderful daughter! It has been so recent for you. I am sure you are sad and depressed. But, your father would want you to enjoy life, your children and everything else in between. Take your time for the grieving process. Talk to a counselor if you need to. Many ((hugs)) your way.
You kids do help you get through, but so does allowing yourself to grieve. The kids need to know you are hurting but that you will get better. However I realized that the shower was my saving grace because I could go in there and bawl my eyes out and no one knew.
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