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Help What can I expect?

Hello I am a 40 year old wife of an alcoholic that was dignosed a year ago with cirrhosis of the liver. Since then He countinued to drink heavy and not eat a year later I started noticing blood on the pillow cases and on his dirty boxers. He lost tons of weight and had no musle tone. He looked yellow and his stomach and legs looked swollen. He went to emergency FINALLY and they had to give him 6 pints of blood they told me that his liver had funtioning liver the size of an aprocot the rest was all scare tissue. They said if he didn't STOP drinking COMPLETELY he would die in a year or 2. He went to rehab for 90 days But as soon as he got out started drinking again. PLUS he vroke his Thumb and for about 2 weeks was poping ibruprofin and Vicodine and drinking. HE LIES the other night he said he didn't feel good He went to bed and I heard a crash I found him shaking All over and he was bleeding from his rectum and mouth ( ALOT of BLOOD) I called 911 and they took him to the hospital They said he was bleeding internally. They gave him an MRI and Blood transfustion. They found 4 ulcers 1 BAD purferated. They did surgery the next day. He is home now, All he does is sleep walk around slowly and eat He seem ok except His skin looks discolored yellow and ashy He is Skinny with bloated stomach and legs also WHite with red blochtes he has red like Blood blisters all over his cheast and sholders too... I am SO SO CONFUSED some people tell me he will live 2-5 years if not longer like this others tell me he has 3-6 months mabe a year to get my affairs in order??? I am SO SCARED!!!!!!!! I have little ones a mortgage I have no idea what to expect. THE damm doctors say its BAD and the liver has hardly nothing left. BUT they say they don't know how long he has and can't speculate.. I don't know if he is drinking he says no and I try to watch him as much as I can but I work. plus he smokes.. ANYONE have any INFO for me??? THANKS!!
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1305762_tn?1311552599
Wow. This is an impossible situation for you. cirrhosis is a big deal. The fact that he kept drinking and abusing pills didn't help matters.

The doctors can't give you a definite answer on how much time he has left because they honestly don't know. The fact is that if he stops drinking and abusing pain medication he might be able to buy some more time but if his health, particularly his liver is as bad as it sounds then it might not be that much.

The hospital should be able to refer you to grief counseling and end-of-life planning services. I would check with them.

I'm sorry this is happening to you. Do you have any friends or family in the area that you can lean on?
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Avatar_f_tn
Thank you for your reply.. YES I have family and friends Praise god plus faith and prayer getting me through each day. Hard part is his family is in complete denial of how sick he is and they say I make more out of it then it is and He can just get a liver transplant. I know that it is NOT that simple. I lost my dad to bone marrow cancer at the age of 60 and I remember the look he had "WEAK CONFUSED DISCOLORED THIN FATIGUE" My husband looks the same way. We go to the doctor tomorrow I am pretty close to our family doctor I am hoping he will give me some insight. Thanks again for your support and kind words. Lillie
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1305762_tn?1311552599
It's unlikely he'd even be put on the list for a liver transplant given his alcoholism.

You can't worry about his family's denial. That's for them to deal with right now. You need to worry about you and your children and taking care of your family. But you know that.

Thoughts are with you. Good luck. Please keep us updated on here. We are here for you.
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Avatar_f_tn
Wow - you have so much on your plate and there are not pat answers.  I would suggest that you get in touch with Alanon for support and as suggested the hospital or your family doc for support for the diagnosis and what to do.  Alcoholism is a tough disease on all.  You need to take care of you and then you will be able to deal with your husband and kids. Find support and lean on your family, friends and your faith.  

Just remember - you are a strong person who can and will handle things as they come.  You and your family will be in  my thoughts and prayer.
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Avatar_f_tn
I just read your post and I feel like you could be me. My husband is 44 and I am 45 and he is an alcoholic with liver disease and just won't stop drinking.  I have gone through the emergency room visits, blood transfusions, bleeding and banding of the blood vessels in his throat.  Nothing will stop the drinking.  I feel as helpless as you describe and I don't know where to turn or who to talk to.  Our daughter is 11 years old and has witnessed the madness.  He has a 21 year old son in California and he knows about the disease but thinks his dad quit drinking.  I don't have the heart to tell him the truth but I can't stand the thought of telling him his dad is dead.  I would love anyone's input/advice.  I will pray for you and your family.
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Avatar_m_tn
I know exactly how you feel.  I am an RN and I have been taking care of my husband.  He also has Hep C and Cirrosis (cirrhosis)...on top of that he is a parapalgic.  He cont. to drink....says he is going to die anyway so why stop.  Last year we were life watched three times before they found the bleeding vein..and put a coil in it.  They also did a TIPS procedure then.  He is jaundice a lot of the time and the swelling is awful..can't get him off the salt no matter how hard I try..in fact I have quit trying..couldn't make him quit drinking so why would I think that I could get him to stop eating salt.  The confusion has started...I often wonder if I am getting ready to enter the end stage, but then he will have a good day and be totaly lucid.  I hate that I have to leave him home alone at night while I work because I never know what I am going to find.  I also feel bad that its nice to work on the other hand, because then I am dealing with other peoples problems..not my own.
Sometimes I don't think its fair that I have to go through all of this and I know that makes me sound selfish, but for our whole relationship I have always put him first and now that he won't even try to make things better it makes it hard.  When he is confused he says the meanest things and that also makes it really hard.
Kim
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Avatar_n_tn
I know where you are coming from. Sometimes I feel like I am the one going crazy! My husband forgets alot now and he continues to drink, the mood swings are rough and change so quick.. He hasn't went back to the dr in 3yrs and says he's not going back for them to tell him what he already knows. He doesn't want them to help him because he won't quit drinking. Most of the time his skin tone is yellowish and sometimes it's greenish-gray.. 3yrs ago his was at stage B, I am not sure what stage he's at he doesn't tell me anything about how he feels I just see the color changes. It's alot for one person to deal with along with trying to keep up with everything. It upsets me that I have always put him first as well and its like he doesn't care what I am gonna have to go through or do. It's hard and God Bless anyone that has to go thru this with someone.
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Avatar_m_tn
I can relate,  2 1/2 years ago my wife was told she had liver failure.  She acted the same way kept drinking in total denial.  She did not want to deal with it.  Then after the 3rd trip to the emergency room she said to me she wants to live.  We sat down and put a plan together.  Every day I remind her of the plan and how we are on track.  She is now in end stage but she stopped drinking and is following everything the doctor wants her to do.  She goes to AA 3 times a week and focuses her time on fund raising to help pay her current and future medical bills.

Last week she had a major bout of hepatic encephalopathy, extreme confusion.  She was admitted to the hospital's ccu.  Because she is doing everything the doctor wants her to do, she was referred to a transplant hospital and has completed all the testing to get on a transplant list.  I keep telling her she will get her transplant and get a life reset button.  In the coming weeks the transplant Bord will vote on her to get on the list.  If they vote no we will go to other transplant hospitals.  

She wants to live and we will not roil over and play dead.

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Avatar_f_tn
Hi everyone, I feel so sad with what everyone has gone through and been going through. I myself am going through the same thing. My cousin is currently admitted and was diagnosed as having Cirrhosis of the liver. The sad thing is,he is only 25 years old. He exhibits the same symptoms, his skin is yellowish,his sclera also yellow. He has edematous feet and his abdomen is enlarged,although it did not harden yet. He is also experiencing hallucinations at night and he finds it difficult to sleep at times. Currently, he is on oxygen therapy because he has difficulty in breathing. My aunt is really worried and everybody in our family as well. I feel really sad and well,  regret is always in the end.he has been drinking since he was 15, and smoking too. I guess he is reaping the consequences of his bad habits. But right now, all we can do is just support him,give him due care and pray for him.
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Avatar_f_tn
My God
I am going through the same thing.  My husband is 41 and he has cirrhosis, high blood pressure and other liver related things.  He continues to drink and is drunk by 0800 am most days.  His sister is a dr and she and other drs have told his to stop but he will not.  He blames me and is a very verbally abusive drunk.  He was told that if he does not stop drinking he will not see 2013.  He drinks 1/2 gallon of gin and 12 or more beers per day.  Please give me any advice you have.
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Avatar_f_tn
The most horrible part is.... Though our lives are "our own" to live how we please, our choices have significant impact on our loved ones... Family, friends..... So while we are free to make the choices we do, perhaps if we stop to think how many OTHER lives our choices will impact, our choices may be different.
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