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How can I survive My Mom's sudden death?
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How can I survive My Mom's sudden death?

My Mom died suddenbly this week. I came home from work to find her on the floor and unresponsive. She was still warm, but not breathing. I performed CPR and the rescue squad worked on her for 25 minutes, but could never get a hearbeat.

My Mom and I have lived together for my entire life. My Dad died when I was in my early 20s and my mom was in her early fifties. First I lived with her, and then I bought a house, and she lived with me. I'm in my fities now and Mom was in her 80s, but had no known major health problems. I loved her with all my heart, and still do. She was my best friend, my buddy, my focus. We did everyhting together, and just seein her things or driving alone in the car without her are stabs in the heart. How can I do this, I feel my purpose for living is gone, I can't imagine ever feeiling joy again. I can't sleep. I can barely eat. And nothing seems to matter. What can I do?

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1419937_tn?1302561449
I feel a part of your pain i lost my dad when i was 7 an im just staring to realise that i need to have feeling in my heart ive done grife counseling an i can tell the ruslut is ASMAZING!!! to be with peapol that know your pain helps in the all parts of your life!!! good luck! :-)
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Avatar_f_tn
I am so sorry for your loss, I know how much it hurts.  Try to concentrate on the good life the two of you shared, the fun times, the times you made each other smile.  Your mother had a long life, and you made sure it was a good one. She would want you to keep going and be happy.  Take the time needed to mourn her loss, cry, laugh, smile, get angry, whatever it takes.  This is a big loss, I lost my mom when I was 25.  I think you need to see a specialist to help you thru this period, it is a life changing event and sometimes things can be too much for us to handle on our own.  When able, do things you are passionate about, get out and enjoy your life, so that your mother can rest in peace in knowing you are again, happy.  Treasure the time you had, it was special and long.  Journal your thoughts, the times you shared, your feelings, putting this in writing is very therapeutic.  I know right now you can't imagine life without her, and that's okay.  The day will come when it will hurt less, I don't know how or why, it just does.  I'm always here if you just want to vent.  My heart goes out to you, and I wish you all the best.  Take care.
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Avatar_f_tn
Thank you both for your kind words. My company has an employee assistance program that includes a provision for counseling. I will call today to arrange an appointment, I can't do this alone. Each morning, I despise waking up. Every day is a roller coaster of pain.

Again, thank you both so much for your encouragement.
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Avatar_f_tn
I think the counseling is a great ideal. I lost my mother 4 years ago, we also were so very close so I understand what you are going through.Its very difficult..... I know I wouldnt be here without my faith in God I just couldnt of endured.Life is forever changed.Just take it one day at a time.In time you will learn how to accept it better although the hurt never ends.I will be praying for you.

God Bless You,
Lisa
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Avatar_f_tn
Thank you so much for your prayers and encouragement. I pray to God every day to help me through this. I find joy in nothing, I'm anxious and heartsick and all kinds of negative emotions rolled into one. I can't sleep and I have to force myself to eat. I know my Mother would not want me to live like this. As a tribute to her, I need to find my way back to life--but I still don't know how.
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Avatar_f_tn
I too understand exactly how you feel after losing my Mother this year.  I find great solace in fellowship with my church members and prayer.  I also have continued to enjoy my work and marriage.  I do feel however, that I am in some sort of fog and not as responsible as I use to be in all aspects of my life.  I have not "broken down" yet to cry my heart out...I feel like something is wrong with me for not having done that.  I do have small episodes whereby I tear up.  There are a few regrets too.  You should have none since you were so loving to your Mother.  We are supposed to honor our parents.  I will say a prayer for you that you may heal quickly and smile upon your wonderful memories from now on until you see your Mother again in Heaven.  

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