Liver Failure and cirrhosis death, anyone go through this? - Grief & Loss

mojoworknn

Sep 02, 2012

To: all

EVERYONE ON THIS PLANET SHOULD HAVE A LIVING WILL, MEDICAL DIRECTIVE, HEALTH CARE PROXY, DNR--- WHATEVER! IT IS SO EASY, AND WILL PREVENT RESPIRATORS AND STOMACH FEEDING TUBES ETC., WHEN AND IF OUR QUALITY OF LIFE DROPS TO ZERO!!

PLEASE DO THIS, ALL OF YOU! HUGS---

brimbo

Sep 03, 2012

To: soccerbudd

Thanks for that....my Mum is a wine drinker who eats little to nothing. She has had a trip to hospital this April after collapsing at 2am. She is yellow in appearance with a swollen tummy and has severe noise bleeds often. I know that she has liver disease but she is a retired nurse who is refusing to go to the doctor. As soon as any thing happens, like we find an empty bottle in the garage or she falls over drunk and blacks her eye, she refuses to talk to us and acts extremely defensive and aggressive. I have resigned myself to the fact that I will probably end up watching her die. To read a sad tale like yours helps me glimpse what might happen and prepare me in some way as I am doubting that she will stop drinking any time soon.

sadinreno

Sep 04, 2012

To: meg8397

My motheer just turned 60 in April and has full blown cirrhosis, she to as a result has developed renal failure but she is receiving dyalisis for 3x per week. I think the most painful part is her suffering and her confusion, it's like watching her die slowly everyday and being helpless in the sideliness. She has slept from 11:00 pm last night and as of 12:33 i can not fully wake her she wakes for 5minutes and falls back asleep. any info you can share

carl386

Sep 04, 2012

To: All

My Dad is dying of primary liver cancer - Just Thank you all for you open heartfelt thoughtful posts.

Dr.carl

Kay0787

Sep 07, 2012

To: Everyone

UPDATE:
My dad died on Sept 3, 2012. Doctor said that they could no longer do any procedure (except blood transfusion and iv medication) since my dad was bleeding severely inside and the last option was liver transplant but my dad was not a candidate either. My mom signed a DNR and watched our father died. No medication, no feeding tubes for 3 days (just pain reliever and morphine on the last day) Seen all the blood came out through his ngt and intubator everytime he coughed. This was very painful. :(

dawnie124

Sep 10, 2012

To: Kay0787

My cousin died on Saturday 1st September 2012. She was in hospital over the Summer and was diagnosed with Jaundice and Hep C which she has had over the years. We were told it was either a tattoo when she was young, from a blood transfusion after her first child, sleeping around or alcohol. Which she and a witness said she had not drank for 6 yrs but the hospital say otherwise. Also been told that on one side of the family there could have been a black person yrs ago and this is why she had too many white blood cells. Her daughter has a bit of it too. In hospital she was waiting a livertransplant then got sceptaceamia then the kidneys failed. I went to see her today with my mum and aunt. Am glad I didnt as my aunt (her mother) said she had gone a black colour and probably best not to see her. I would rather give her the respect and remember how she was. She was ony 51 and left behind 3 daughters and 10 grandchildren with one on the way in the coming weeks.

DanaMae49

Sep 15, 2012

To: Kay0787

I am so sorry for your loss and pain. My brother is dying of cirrhosis as I type this. I wanted to say that you and your mom will not be responsible for the hospital costs, I believe. If your dad had property in his name they will attempt to take it for his bill. But your mom will have to fight it. I know you adn your mom experienced unbelievable pain watching him die. Please know he is at peace now and no longer suffers. May God bless you.

jimbo130

Sep 16, 2012

To: DanaMae49

My brother just died a couple of weeks ago. He started bleeding profusly and went in the hospital to find he had hepatitus (hepatitis) and cirrosis (cirrhosis) of the Liver.
They tried to save him but his kidey's started to fail and his blood pressure dropped. He ended up on life support. His wish was not to be on life support so they took him off and he died shortly later. I know we are all mortal but I never lost I would loose him. He was only 55 and I think of all that he will not be able to do. I can only hope that he is in a better place.
Jim L

jimbo130

Sep 16, 2012

To: DanaMae49

My brother just died a couple of weeks ago. He started bleeding profusly and went in the hospital to find he had hepatitus (hepatitis) and cirrosis (cirrhosis) of the Liver.
They tried to save him but his kidney's started to fail and his blood pressure dropped. He ended up on life support. His wish was not to be on life support so they took him off and he died shortly later. I know we are all mortal but I never thought I would loose him. He was only 55 and I think of all that he will not be able to do. I can only hope that he is in a better place.
Jim L

sara123966

Sep 24, 2012

To: tracy_beach

hi tracy my dad died of the same thing in june,i stayed with him for two weeks in hospital and watched him deteriate slowly its the worst thing ive ever seen in my life and has ripped me apart as a person . my dad drank on and off for twenty yrs but was the nicest friendliest person you could ever meet, but im so glad i held his hand till the end.

km2012

Sep 30, 2012

My dad passed away 2 years ago from cirrhosis of the liver. He was a heavy drinker for 20+ years. The last 5 years of his life he was in and out of the hospital. He says he quit drinking but we know now he hadn't. The first signs were vomiting blood around 8 years ago. He progressively got worse. He would blood infections in his blood, dropped down to 100lbs, could not eat, he had so many stomach pains...he was in the hospital this last time for about 6 months..he was just not getting better..I got a call at work he was dying. I came in and they had a CPAP on him to help him breathe. He was delusional and completely out of it. They kept giving him morphine to keep him comfortable. We decided against life support- the dr. said we made a good decision. I don't think my dad would have ever stopped drinking. My grandma stayed overnight in the chair next to his bed and I slept on the cold hospital floor. He was turning yellow and his kidneys started to shut down..his oxygen levels were dropping..his heart stayed strong though..it makes me so sad because if he would have stopped drinking a long time ago he could be here today. He finally passed away the next day at 8am with me and my grandparents there. His eyes never closed and his mouth looked so funny. He looked so sick and terrible I can never get that picture out of my head. I wish he never drank that much. After he passed we cleaned out his apartment and I found receipts from the grocery store. When he was living at home he was drinking two bottles of wine a day...after numerous of doctors telling him to quit.

shasha72117

Oct 02, 2012

To: rohit8126

Aww hun you were there with her when she needed you the most and trust me she was blessed to have you. I am a mother whith hep c and i worry constantly about the pain i am causing my young children my son is only 15 1/2 and he is my rock. I know you were your moms as well.

kristy_lee

Oct 02, 2012

To: everyone

hello everyone.. Im back...

been a while, but for anyone interested here is where Im at with my dad.
he was refused at the hospital for the drains of the fluid.. they told him he needed to come in only when he reached a weight of 76kg... but the fluid was preventing him from keeping food down so he was losing weight and wasnt reaching this weight... he got so full that he started to not even be able to drink anything, so he went to emergency and they kept him in for three days to drain and monitor him, he came home feeling much better.
yesterday I went up to see him and he was laying in bed groaning in pain and had been vomiting all morning. the pallative care nurse wanted him to go to the hospital but he refused. he said it felt like his stomach was going to burst (he has a hernia) and he said the muscles felt like they were tearing apart... he isnt on any pain killers his mouth was so dry he struggled to talk to me. there was blood on his toung too. not sure why... he did manage to get up tho and sat in the loung chair for a chat. he is due to have a drain in hosp tomorrow. hopefully he isnt too uncomfortable while he waits for that.
anyway.. I keep reading these stories and Im so greatful you have all posted.. I guess you have given me the courage to post my story and maybe it mighthelp someone.. Even tho I need answers myself.

Martyjc1

Oct 04, 2012

I was just told my wife has a week to a month to live. She will go into a coma soon. I tried to get her to quit drinking. I kept buying the booze. It is as if I killed her. I should have done more. She doesn't know yet but she feels it. We see the doctor tomorrow. Then she will know. I'm scared, it's been a long battle. It's like I want to go to sleep and not wake up. I don't know I just wanted to vent. Thanks

stevensauntkathy197

Oct 06, 2012

I lost my 23 nephew a month ago to alcoholic liver failure. I had never heard of someone that young losing their life to this disease. I came here for some answers, hopefully I will find them through other peoples experiences with this disease.

stevensauntkathy197

Oct 10, 2012

I guess my nephews passing was alot easier than some I have read here about. We didnt have the years of drinking and being sick before he passed away. It was relatively short. He was sick last August with what the doctor said was pancreatitis. He was told not to drink anymore. But he was 22 and thought he knew everything. Than a few months later he has seizures due to NOT drinking, so he figured if this is what happens when I dont drink, than a drink will help. He lost his appetite, lost weight than took on a yellow appearance. He was taken to the emergency room on a Friday night, where he was sent to another hospital that preformed liver transplants. By Monday he was being kept comfortable. We lost him on Tuesday morning. I guess we should feel lucky to have been spared the years of this disease. I miss him terribly

AdpVil

Nov 01, 2012

To: Kay0787

My husband passed away on the 22nd of September under the same circumstances. He was only 53. I stayed with him until the end. I prayed for him, sang for him, told him his grandson (who was born on the 25th of September) will be named after him and held his hand until he stopped breathing. I miss him terribly. Only he knew why he could not stop drinking. No matter how much we tried we just never could get him to accept that he had a problem and that he needs treatment. He was in hospital for almost two months and suffered terribly. I hope one day I will be able to accept what happened and accept that I could not do more than what I have already done.

kane3

Nov 02, 2012

I lost my dad yesterday, ...on my birthday...to liver failure...kidney failure...because of alcohol.
I watched him suffer for 6 months in the hospital...He had alot of ups and downs, smiles and frowns...
I never knew this could be so painful, so sad.
I feel really lost, really hurt...I feel bad that I couldn't help him...

gwennie10

Nov 06, 2012

I lost my mother due hep c liver failure August 30th of this year. About 3 weeks after I got married. We never could figure out how she got this ugly disease but she did work in the medical field for years. It has been so rough and the road was rough and some things I have read here remind me of things we went through with her. In the end it was the simple negligence of the Dr's and their thinking about people with Hep C that did her in. She was a fighter and the best person I knew. She would do anything for anyone. She was always there to help. She was a great Mamaw to my 2 year old daughter and my neice and nephew. She was doing so good for so long and certain things had become routine for us. My daughter was used to seeing her in the hospital when she would have to go in for IV Lasix. My daughter actually thinks the Dr's are still making my mom better (how do you explain to a 2 year old????). Anyway she passed of Spontaneous Bacterial Perotonitis (hope I spelled that correctly). She was in and out of the hospital where we live before and after my wedding. They kept telling her it was nothing (although when I saw her lab work and blood pressures I knew something was not right but noone would help her) so we went on our yearly family vacay to FL (and partially my honeymoon). And me and my husband had to come home after a week but everyone else stayed home and one day after being home I got the call mom was in the hospital and admitted to ICU. The Dr's down there cared and knew something was wrong. They did all they could but she was too sick. It's been really rough because we were so close (we worked together before went back to school together saw and talked multiple times a day). She was my everything and now I don't have her. Liver failure is nothing to mess with and I wish Dr's cared more for their patients. They make them feel humilated about things and talk down to them. I just keep wondering if I had known everything when she was in the hospital the first time could I have made the Dr's test for what she passed of (every Dr asked her if she ever had it and since she didn't they didn't even look). Everyone says it will get easier but for me each day seems to get harder.

drmom911

Nov 06, 2012

I lost a grandfather to cihrossis as well. It's hard to watch them die and I don't think you ever get over that. I found in my own life it has had a tendency to make me over aware, overly sensitive to those in my life that drink heavily. I'm so sorry for your loss.

kristy_lee

Nov 07, 2012

To: the group

Hi Everyone

took my dad to a magic show last night, he really enjoyed it. he told me before we left to go to it that he really didnt think he was going to actually be here to go to it. was sad to see the tears in his eyes as he told me.
life is very precious - im holding onto every moment I have with him, I know it can be gone when you least expect it.

he also asked me if he could die at home. im scared that I will not be able to deal with taking care of him... I told him I would do my best tho and if it got to hard the palletive care nurses would help.
we talk seriously about it - but make jokes along the way (this helps him to keep from crying) feels like its not real sometimes.

hoping for a miricle for him, and for all of you.

Kris
x

drmom911

Nov 12, 2012

Oh Kris. That's so hard. I have been there with my grandmother as she wanted both my brother and my mom there with her when she died. They were there till the end, the two that took care of her the most and I know now, five years later, they wouldn't have it any other way. You will find your strength.

kristy_lee

Nov 15, 2012

To: drmon911

thank you. I have tried to do everytihng I can now - I do not want to hold any regrets afterwards, when there is nothing I can do about it.

chin up and onwards we move..I hope I find stength when the time is upon me.

thank you again

drmom911

Nov 20, 2012

Hi Kristy. Wising you some peace this Thanksgiving. Keeping you in my thoughts and prayers!

hangingontolife

Nov 20, 2012

To: Martyjc1

Martyjc1,
my prayers to you. My husband is suffering from cirrohsis and is fighting to get on the transplant list. I hope that you find the peace you so need it is such a hard experience.

kristy_lee

Nov 22, 2012

To: dr Mom

thank you, this group has given me so many things that I know Ill need downt the track. you all help so much just by posting your own stories. I used to feel alone in this. but i feel i now have a place to go.

so thank you all again.

kristy_lee

Dec 02, 2012

To: everyone

Hi all.

Dads going into hospital tomorrwo to have an acsitic tap. his legs are so swollen he cant walk more than 20 meters. I massage his legs to help move the fluid - it only helps momentarily as the fluid doesnt go anywhere... its like memory foam... can press fingers into it and the it forms the shape of my finger. skin is so tight it shines. his skin is reddish on his calves but his feet are quite yellow. massaging it is the only relief he can get, untill tomorrow hopefully. apart from the swelling and the jaundice he seems to be doing ok I guess... has been a bit forgetful eg - thought it was friday when it was wednesday. couldnt remember things we had spoken about only the week before... but generally he has been ok. eating small but frequently...cant keep it down otherwise.
is taking his fluid tablets... but the swelling still severe.

its hard to see him struggling with this.

its hard to imagine it will get worse, I know it will.

today we will set up our christmas tree - I hope to get my 10 yr old son to lay beneth the tree with my dad and I, with just the christmas lights on, listening to John Lennon - So this is Christmas. (small tradition in my family) Dad loves that song and I think it will make his Christmas very special if we get to do that :)

so still making memories as I know they will be what gets me through when times get tougher.

I hope you all make memories to treasure this christmas.. and for those who have lost, my heart goes out to you.

mscam

Dec 13, 2012

To: km2012

My sister called me last night and told me that my beautiful 45 year old nephew was admitted to the hospital after his daughter called 911 because he also was vomiting blood. He has been diagnosed with cirrhosis and we have been told that he needs a liver transplant. The scary thing is that no one suspected that he had a problem; he has been a "functioning alcoholic". There were some red flags but I guess no one suspected that there was a serious problem. I, for one, ignored what should have been a sign that there was a serious problem. Almost four years ago my other son who is now 43, told me that he had picked up a water bottle, thinking it was his, and when he took a drink, discovered that the bottle did not contain water but vodka. My nephew then told my son the bottle belonged to him. Since this just happened yesterday, we don't know yet what his prognosis is, or what stage the cirrhosis is but we are hoping that it is not too late for him. Our whole family is in shock and we are all very scared.

nana2two

Dec 17, 2012

To: mscam

I just lost my 65 year old husband to alcoholic cirrsis on October 31st. For years I begged him to get help but would'nt even see a doctor. He lost so much weight that he was skin & bones. His abdomen was big & hard. He just lost his appetite & desire to eat. He was losing control of everything. His memory was so bad. He was so weak he could'nt even walk to the bathroom. Its a horrible disease to watch. Finally I got a private ambulance to take him to the hospital. They took 14 liters of fluid out of his abdomen. He was in ICU but the doctor put him into a regular room. He had an IV for fluids, & a feeding tube in his nose down to his stomach. They were treating him with Lactulose to get rid of the amonia (ammonia) building up to his brain. As soon as they took fluid out it would keep coming back. He was pretty much out of it by then. The doctor advised me to put him in hospice. I agreed after a few days. Basically what the do is take him off everything & give morphine & pain medication when needed. They said they were just keeping him comfortable. All they did was checkhis vitals. All his other organs were in great shape. Just the liver was gone completely. After 3 weeks in the hospital he passed away while I was there staying in the hospice room with him. Its a horrible death. He could'nt even speak at all. Just stare. I don't even know if he knew who I was. All I could do was rub his head & hand & tell him I loved him. I never wanted to suffer so much. Cirrosis (cirrhosis) has to be one of the most difficult ways to watch a person die before your eyes. I understand each of your concerns & problems. May God Bless each & every one. Love & Prayers being sent your way.

Alley808

Dec 19, 2012

To: Anyone who wants to read it

I lost my mother in July this year. She was just 55. She had been an alcoholic and tried to dry out many times over the last decade or so. Her liver had 95% failed just over a year before she died. She had already stopped drinking. She had chronic asthma. She was also slightly brain damaged , not so much as you'd notice but close family would. She had hepatitis in her younger years. After her liver failed she spent the majority of the year in and out of hospital . She was so weak she couldnt feed or wash or dress herself and was in a wheelchair, then she would have days where she was fine out gardening. She was jaundiced almost all the time for the last year and the whites of her eyes took on a greenish hue. She was exhausted, had no balance. She would bruise very easily as her blood would not clot. Anyone with a someone going through this knows what a viscious circle it is. She was in the process of being sent to the liver hospital in Dublin for tests for a liver transpant as she had been sober for more than a year, when she ended up in hospital again, she was severely struggling to breath and had a temperature, plus the usual constipation, swollen stomach pain etc. She was basically left there until Monday when she begged to be allowed to Dublin for her liver transplant elegibility tests. When she arrived we were told she had pneumonia and was in a fairly bad way but we had no idea how bad. she was extremely agitated over not being able to breath and had to have a mask strapped to her head. We found out she had e coli in her lungs and blood clots aswell - god only knows how they missed this in the other hospital. After about a week she was moved into the ICU where she deteriorated, we still did not know she was dying her kidneys failed, she couldn't breath she was in pain, her liver had totally shut down. Over the next few days it somehow got worse she bled out, fitted, vomited, you name it she went through it. I remember when she first got sick and i was looking on sites to try and prepare myself and i couldn't find anything like what actually happened. The eventually intubated her on the saturday even though we had asked for days because she was begging for us to kill her because she could not breathe. The next day the machines were turned off , she ony lived for a few minutes she just breathed out and died.

Tinker35

Dec 30, 2012

My ex-husband is dying. He has been an alcoholic for 20 years. Now he has end-stage liver disease. We have 2 young adult kids who are trying to deal with watching him get worse every day. His belly was swollen and full of fluid. He had 12 pounds (5.7 liters) removed on Wednesday. He is already full of fluid again, and isn't sure if he wants to go through that painful procedure again. He sleeps 15+ hours a day and can barely walk to the bathroom with help. I hope it isn't a long, painful slow death. He is alert and clear-headed, and he knows he is dying. He is scared and cries a lot. He has bands in his esophogus to keep them from bleeding again. The doctors won't give him a time frame. We don't know if he has days, weeks or months left. The pain is terrible. He will be signing up for Hospice as soon as his doctor signs the paper. Hopefully Hospice can manage his pain.

mammo

Jan 04, 2013

To: Tinker35

Hi...I am so sorry for all your family is enduring, it's so sad. Watching a loved one suffer and knowing they don't have much time is so very difficult. You and your children must understand that the alcohol had him and it's a very difficult to stop. People become alcoholics as a way of coping with things in their lives. It starts out with a few drinks and before they even know it, they're addicted. Try to impress upon your children that their dad has been suffering for 20 years, inside....but still suffering. Tell them to appreciate this time to let their dad know how much they love him and to say all they've ever wanted to...some of us don't get this opportunity. All of you will feel better if you let him know you understand why he drank, and that you still have fond memories and still love him just as much. Take this opportunity to make peace with everything in your hearts. Their dad will live on in his children and they need to know this. They will carry him with them for the rest of their lives as he smiles down on what wonderful children he has. Tell them to live a happy and honorable life as this is what their dad wants more than anything. Hospice will not allow him to suffer, they will keep him pain free. But often this means he will sleep even more, so it's imperative that all of you spend this time with him and say everything that is important to all of you. You want him to leave this world knowing he was loved. My heart goes out to all of you, and I hope this helps is some way. Hugs to all of you....

kristy_lee

Jan 08, 2013

To: everyone

Hi All

Dads been in hospital over christmas - had a drain and they discovered a massive clot in his leg.. I now have to give him a daily injection of blood thinner to help it desolve and to prevent more happening... his leg was so swollen and horrible... it was starting to blister and leak :( poor bugger.
its so hard... so so hard... the drs came into see him and there were 6 drs...all looking very grave... they told him that this was a clear sign things had progressed and that once id been educated on how to give the injections he would be going home and that if anything happens from here on in im to call pallitive care.... I guess that really hit me pretty hard.
when i first walked into that room - before the drs came in to see us... my dad was sitting at a small desk, back to the door, thinking and writing down questions on a piece of paper... i wanted to cry, this man, my dad, is clutching at straws and obviously feels scared and frightened about whats coming. and there is nothing I can do. he is more yellow than before... sleeps majority of the day... has what seems like a million pills to take... apart from some conversations that seem od or a bit off track he is still mentally ok.
giving him the injections is terrifying... but I have to do it... he said he would prefer me to do them. but then he instructs me and starts to get mad or cranky cause he thinks im taking too long to do it.. the last one we both yelled at each other and then burst into tears hugging each other,... it was just aweful. a daughter trying to help and a father sick of the pain and needles yet still trying to be strong for me... I cant imagine from his side of things.

so. I guess we are coming into the home stretch... but i pray that we have another corner to turn.. and more time. except I feel guilty because I know if he had the choice he would want it to all be over.

:(
amongst all of this Tasmania has been gripped by raging bush fires and my home was very close to being lost... my front fence was burned down and the fire came within meters of my house...we were homeless for three nights as the fire burned many houses and towns in our community.. thankfully my dad was up at the hospital and safe at the time.
many decisions I made in the last few days meant my family were able to move and act fast enough...

I was praying for a better 2013... unfortunatly it appears im out of luck :(

staystrongstav

Jan 16, 2013

To: km2012

My dad just passed on Jan. 12th 2013.
Feels strange to even say that.
He had end stage cirrhosis and ascites for roughly 3 years. I took him regularly for "taps". In November in had got a infection in his ascite fluid. Took him to ER for iv antibiotics. Then got transferred to long term care for iv antibiotics. Then developed kidney failure, pneumonia, blood infection. He had not eaten in 5 weeks do to "illeus" partial stomach obstruction. Then he was incubated. I made the decision to "pull the plug". He is now existing in heaven. And I will be with him soon. CANT WAIT!

angelntn1

Jan 22, 2013

To: All above

I am sorry for your lost. My prayers are for your family. My brother has end stage liver from alcoholic liver disease. It not easy watching him each day waste away. Hes only 53. I have read how so many others are feeling like I do. Sad and wish I could do more. I lost my husband Feb. 23.2000 and in Feb 18, 2007 l lost my grandson Peyton 4yrs old and his dad in a house fire. We bury them on the 23 of Feb. last week the doctor told me they are just keeping him in comfort.. And with Feb. coming I just..feel like is that when we lose him. He been caregiver for my mom for many years and we are worry about mom too. My prayers go out to all that feel like you cannot make the love one stop drinking. But maybe sharing our pain someone may see and read this and stop drinking before someone may be adding them too. I love my brother I just wish he would of stop his alcohol use. Now he suffer so much. I pray heavenly father you give us all strength Amen . Nancy

kristy_lee

Jan 23, 2013

To: everyone

so - dad is going through a really tuff time. he is getting confused ect.. very yellow eyes, not toileting and hardly able to eat.
everything ive read so far has said that this is pretty serious.. I have had some great support on the site from others who are going throught the same things...
things went down hill fast... i plan to take time from work to be with him. he needs help to dress and shower and eat.. well what he can eat that is. and that is very little. ive made him a milkshake type of food/drink and this is about all he can keep down.. very small amounts and not very often.
i htink he has started to give up. he is utterly exhausted. seems an effort to breath.

i hope he gets through this one. but he told my partner he is near to the end... i guess he has given up. had enough of the needles, the visits to the hospital, the waiting.

i wonder how long my dad has to suffer this horrible thing...
I wish things were different.. they are not. i hope he doesnt suffer too much more. its agonising seeing him wasting away and losing hope.
and i keep wondering.. no matter how much reasearch i do.. how many questions i ask, how many stories i read, WHAT WILL HAPPEN? what way will this thing take him? how much can he take?
this site is great but i have found there is no getting past the fact that NO ONE can tell you or prepare you for what will come.

silkthesully

Jan 24, 2013

To: mesastopholies

so very touched by what you said. Impressed you exude no anger... just love for your mother. How awesome you cared for her as you did.

silkthesully

Jan 24, 2013

To: mojoworknn

so very touched by what you said. Impressed you exude no anger... just love for your mother. How awesome you cared for her as you did.

silkthesully

Jan 24, 2013

To: mojoworknn

Yes, all that legal ease is important. However, I was in a coma for three months. I was ventilated, then trached. The dr.s wanted to take me off life support. My 85 year old father would not let them. The dr.s said we will not to CPR on her, my dad said you will do everything you can. I woke up. No, I am not the same... but my children and family have had almost 4 more years with me. I have also had stage III advanced breast cancer. Only given a 25 % chance to live 5 years... that was in 06. Honestly, I think due to the cost... our mindset to just let people go has been pushed on us through media to save the insurance companies and government money. Give someone at least 6 months... maybe even a year. We grow in our mothers womb for 9 months .... but I think we give up to fast . Sorry , but I am a living example.

kristy_lee

Feb 03, 2013

To: everyone

well, the morning after my last post, My Dad passed away.
I just cannot beleive it to be honest.

it was such a shock - even though Ive had the past 12 months caring for him and knowing this would happen... it hit me like a brick.

we were with him on wednesday night, talking and I knew he was pretty worried. he held my hand and thanked me for looking after him. He asked me to shave him, so I did.. he felt better after that..tho I could still see he was truely exhausted. my partner was the last to speak to my dad.
I found him, the next morning, at about 7am. he had gotten up, maybe through the night and had put on his christmas lights and let his love bird out of his cage as he normally would... he was until the day before, still mobile and able to do everthing for himself. it was only when he tried to put up a curtain and he fell three times... then he was really worried and spoke to my partner and I able having to help him shower ect... he did not want me bearing the brunt of this so he made sure my partner was able and willing to do these things instead of me... turns out we would never have to help him in this way. so while sitting in his recliner watching tv, was when I guess his liver totally failed. he hadnt struggled.... had simply turned his head to the side. where he seems to have vomited blood on his shoulder and thats where he stayed. I would think from this that it was rather fast... he didnt try to get up, to reach for a towel, to move at all. I went up to see him, worried he might be a bit concerned that i was taking yet another day off work... but i found him, just as I discribed.. head slumped to the side, those beautiful blue eyes open, just staring. I toughed his shoulder, he was still warm and called his name three times before i seen on his right side the blood.. well its not like blood... its a horrible black dark dark red stuff like ground coffee i guess.. I turned and ran so fast to get my partner.. not crying yet as I was not 100% sure I was even awake... seemed to unreal.

then when my partner came up and he followed me into see him and i heard his shock then I knew.. I knew it was real. my dad had really gone.
I broke down then.

I guess I knew... when the afternoon before id gone up to see him and he was so confused and his eyes were so yellow they scared me...
I guess I was scared then because before they were only ever yellow in the corners of his eyes... this time the whites of his eyes were completly yellow.

he passed away on 24/1/13.
and we said our goodbys only two days later 26/1/13 - Australia day.

I know now he is not hurting and he loved me and was greatful for me taking care of him.. he got to tell me so.

I will continue to follow this tread... if it doesnt hurt too much.

thanks for listening

Kris

rest eternally in peace Dad - I love you so much.

kristy_lee

Feb 03, 2013

To: everyone

well, the morning after my last post, My Dad passed away.
I just cannot beleive it to be honest.

it was such a shock - even though Ive had the past 12 months caring for him and knowing this would happen... it hit me like a brick.

we were with him on wednesday night, talking and I knew he was pretty worried. he held my hand and thanked me for looking after him. He asked me to shave him, so I did.. he felt better after that..tho I could still see he was truely exhausted. my partner was the last to speak to my dad.
I found him, the next morning, at about 7am. he had gotten up, maybe through the night and had put on his christmas lights and let his love bird out of his cage as he normally would... he was until the day before, still mobile and able to do everthing for himself. it was only when he tried to put up a curtain and he fell three times... then he was really worried and spoke to my partner and I able having to help him shower ect... he did not want me bearing the brunt of this so he made sure my partner was able and willing to do these things instead of me... turns out we would never have to help him in this way. so while sitting in his recliner watching tv, was when I guess his liver totally failed. he hadnt struggled.... had simply turned his head to the side. where he seems to have vomited blood on his shoulder and thats where he stayed. I would think from this that it was rather fast... he didnt try to get up, to reach for a towel, to move at all. I went up to see him, worried he might be a bit concerned that i was taking yet another day off work... but i found him, just as I discribed.. head slumped to the side, those beautiful blue eyes open, just staring. I toughed his shoulder, he was still warm and called his name three times before i seen on his right side the blood.. well its not like blood... its a horrible black dark dark red stuff like ground coffee i guess.. I turned and ran so fast to get my partner.. not crying yet as I was not 100% sure I was even awake... seemed to unreal.

then when my partner came up and he followed me into see him and i heard his shock then I knew.. I knew it was real. my dad had really gone.
I broke down then.

I guess I knew... when the afternoon before id gone up to see him and he was so confused and his eyes were so yellow they scared me...
I guess I was scared then because before they were only ever yellow in the corners of his eyes... this time the whites of his eyes were completly yellow.

he passed away on 24/1/13.
and we said our goodbys only two days later 26/1/13 - Australia day.

I know now he is not hurting and he loved me and was greatful for me taking care of him.. he got to tell me so.

I will continue to follow this tread... if it doesnt hurt too much.

thanks for listening

Kris

rest eternally in peace Dad - I love you so much.

kane3

Feb 18, 2013

To: nana2two

I know the feeling, I went through the exact same thing watching my Dad ...he passed on the 31st of Oct as well...seen all the same things, it was so sad...keep strong

softie2013

Feb 22, 2013

To: fred4me

I just lost my 40 year old fiance a month ago (Jan. 21, 2013) due to liver failure. He had been Gin a constant basis for about 2 years and it seemed like over night he became jaundiced. He was almost orange and even the whites of his eyes were yellow. Finally, I convinced him to go to the local hospital and he got three different unrealiable diagnosis so it was 2 to 3 weeks before I could influence (beg) him to go to one of the best hospitals in the state. Well, Saturday morning at 1:00 am in the morning, I convinced him to let me take him to that one in the top 10 best hospitals in the nation but it was too late. They were doing all that they could possibly do but his liver was so far gone that he died the following Monday. Unfortunately, I didn't get closure because once he was admitted, they immediately began to work on his failing body and he was unconscious. I didn't get to say goodbye, I love you or anything and this just breaks my heart even more. I dated him about a year and a half and begged him when I first met him to not only stop drinking or at least cut back and also, go get a checkup because he told me he hadn't had a checkup in years. Had he gone a year and a half ago, he could have gotten a new liver however, since he didn't he paid the sad price. He had so much potential. He had an IQ of 150, a Doctorate of chiropractic, and over 200 credit hours of college. Such a waste of a great mind but he just couldn't kick the addiction. I miss him beyond belief and can hardly function somedays from the horrible grief in my heart.

davidwithliverproblems531

Feb 28, 2013

To: kristy_lee

i also have liver problems cirrhosis. some days i feel ok and other days i feel relay bad. my doctor says this is because of the blood flow through the liver he may appear fine and his eyes may look ok however the em zines may be better then they were before. have his em zines checked monthly. only prevention can prolong his and my life. transplants are very hard to get unless you or your family member wants to take the risk of the surgery. my brother wants to donate half of his liver to me my answer to that was NO. he can have a vain from his leg put in his liver so the blood doesent go through the liver. but the surgery is about 200,000 thousand dollars.

steph1107

Mar 03, 2013

My mom has cirrhosis and hep c due to heavy drinking . She has had it for as long as i can remember. I am 25. She was told over 15 years ago she would not live past 5 years. Although the past few years her health has declined, she continues to drink heavily. She has been in and out of the hospital due to this diseases. She has gotten extremely thin except in her belly where she looks 9 months pregnant. Last week she lost control of her bowls. She has been using the bathroom on herself at night due to it. Does anyone know if this is a sign of her liver shutting down? I've been trying to research it but haven't been able to find anything. She refuses to go to the hospital because she cannot drink beer there. Can someone tell me if your loved ones have experienced this please? Thanks

steph1107

Mar 03, 2013

My mom has cirrhosis and hep c due to heavy drinking . She has had it for as long as i can remember. I am 25. She was told over 15 years ago she would not live past 5 years. Although the past few years her health has declined, she continues to drink heavily. She has been in and out of the hospital due to this diseases. She has gotten extremely thin except in her belly where she looks 9 months pregnant. Last week she lost control of her bowls. She has been using the bathroom on herself at night due to it. Does anyone know if this is a sign of her liver shutting down? I've been trying to research it but haven't been able to find anything. She refuses to go to the hospital because she cannot drink beer there. Can someone tell me if your loved ones have experienced this please? Thanks

bukie300

Mar 06, 2013

To: steph1107

Hi Steph

I lost my husband of liver and kidney failure early last month, it's like a nightmare. He had also been drinking alot & didn't want to go to the hospital. The reason why her stomach looks as if she's pregnant could be because there's fluid build up in her stomach (ascites).

Pray for your mother. Both you and your mother will need the love and support of family and friends. It's not easy to look after a loved one in that state.

cambtone

Mar 08, 2013

To: everyone

Hi,
I'm a medical doctor and scientist and an alcoholic. I have cirrhosis and esophageal varices. I know I can't reverse this, and I know I will die soon. I am screened regularly for hepatic cancer, but I would rather die from a drunk overdoes than having to suffer a futile cancer treatment. Am I wrong?

kellers01

Mar 09, 2013

I came here after googling signs of death cirrhosis.  What an amazing amount of information everybody has provided.  I guess I just don't know what to expect and was looking for some answers.

I took my mom (55) to the hospital mid January because of her belly swelling and she was jaundice.  She's been a heavy drinker for decades. They kept her for a week and did every test possible.  They knew it was cirrhosis but thought it might be more I guess.  They did a tap (1.5L) and she went home.

A couple of weeks later, I took her to a different hospital.  She was there a week or so and did two taps (2.5 and 4L) and we got her set up with hospice.  During most of her stay she'd gotten really confused and didn't call me by the correct name (I'm her only daughter, 1 of 2 children).  It was just bizzare.

She was released and came to my home.  Her confusion went away. She seemed better and kept saying she was going to be fine, etc.  She's sleeping most of the day, eating very little, and extremely weak.  They came to do another tap but her blood pressure was too low (90/60) so they didn't.  They came a few days later after taking her off some of the water pills and it was 82/60.  Put her back on pills.  Came yesterday and it's 82/50 heart rate 110.  Her tummy is the most swollen it's been at this point.

I have no idea how long her suffering will be or what to expect I guess.

rpooo

Mar 10, 2013

To: All

Anyone with any questions regarding cirrhosis please feel welcome to visit our Cirrhosis of the Liver Community.

http://www.medhelp.org/forums/Cirrhosis-of-the-Liver/show/1390

mony4182

Mar 10, 2013

To: kellers01

I just admitted my fiance this morning after him taking his final fall onto the bathroom floor. According to GI specialist he drinking was going on for far longer than any of us knew. They are waiting for his blood to cloth so that they take the fluid out of his abdomen. He has been jaundice for sometime and I saw the signs of this coming for some time now. He liver is almost nothing, so if he does make it he wil be in and out of the hospital constantly until he can complete an AA program of some sort in order to even qualify him for a new liver. I am 31, and he is 41, I never thought at this point in my life I would be going through this, I'm not sure how to continue my life without him(although I know I will somehow) I am completely numb from the thought of the man I know who so is beautiful, but yet haunted for so long with so many demons about to die. We had so many plans in life, our future children named and it's all about to be taken away from us and he is about to be taken from this world. It's his fault he drank, but he actually quit not that long ago, but it was to late for his body. I stopped home to walk the dog and try and breathe, but so far only the dog has been walked. I just want to scream at the world as loud as I can and hold onto him so he knows how much he is loved. I know that pain will subside, but it just keeps getting worse. Those of you that pray, I ask for prayers for his peace and comfort and to know love

NCass

Mar 12, 2013

To: gwennie10

I went through a very similar thing with my Mum last May.The Dr's kept sending her home with no diagnosis.I knew that she was dying and when she was eventually admitted with acute liver failure due to auto immune disease she died a slow death 2 weeks later.I am now starting to remember her as she was before her illness but we are all still haunted as a family about it all.I find it hard to work,be a good Mum and wife and to talk about it.Most of the time i wish I could just sleep my time away.I have so much anger towards the hospital and although i know that the outcome would probably have been the same,the journey was very difficult due to poor communication and a lack of empathy from nursing staff.Sorry to be so negative but it needs to comeout sometimes ...

kellers01

Mar 13, 2013

To: mony4182

I'm 29, so I can relate, age wise. This is a terrible thing to watch, isn't it? Do the doctors think he might pull through or is it too late?

mony4182

Mar 14, 2013

To: kellers01

His kidney's are holding and he was responding well to things and was going to start physical therapy, but this morning he had pain in his belly and it turns out he has a hernia and an obstucted bowel. They wont do surgery for obvious reasons that he would probably die on the table, so now its wait and see what happens. They gave him pain meds earlier and due to the liver not processing that drug it has made him very loopy today. I brought my lap top and am sitting in the hospital as I write this. Whenever he wakes I I try and just get him talking about things we used to do and show him slideshows of pictures on here and he seems to focus for a bit and his mind comes back to him for a short while. I just hope he knows how much he is loved and that I'm here with him. Day by day we take it, but somehow somewhere I am somewhat at peace today a bit.

LivingForABetterTomorrow

Mar 21, 2013

My aunt died of cirrohis in July of 2012. She is the best aunt I every had. She was like a sister and best friend and like a second mom. I miss her so much and always wonder to myself why would she do that when she has 12 kids? I still have a hard time coping with her death. I miss her so much. I just remember one day when her boyfriend called and told us something is wrong with her, he said she was standing in the corner and very confused. And he said he was frighten off of it. We told him get help! He was afraid and we found out why, it was because he was drunk to. She started drinking heavily when she met him. I wish sometimes she never met him. But I look at my little cousins and am blessed for what she left behind. So after I tried to do what I can to get help for her, he finally got help. I called him to make sure and in the background I could hear her talking but very confused. She didn't know her own name. She didn't know where she was and what she was doing. My parents flew out to Salt Lake City where she was admitted to the hospital and went into coma. It was like a roller coaster cause one minute they say she'll be okay, she'll make it threw until we got the call that her internal organs all shutdown and she won't be albe to make it. After her funeral we found out that she was waiting for liver transplant and never told no one about it, not even her kids or boyfriend. Only she knew. I always wondered why she hid it, until I read most of these stories that my guess was she didn't want us to know why she needed them. Now I understand. It's very heartbreaking and I wish everyday that she was still here with us and that she never drank. Now that thought came to me, myself and I think about my kids. I don't want my kids to be left with unanswered thoughts like I'm wondering about her. She was very young, she was 32. I made a promise to her that I won't drink no more so I'm stopping. Thank you very much for everyone stories. RIP auntie Stephanie, I really miss you so much.

mony4182

Mar 22, 2013

To: LivingForABetterTomorrow

My fiance passed away in my arms on Monday morning. I don't know how I feel. Part of me is relieved that he is no longer in pain mentally or physically and that this nightmare of being in denial over the fact that he was an alcoholic is over and then the other part is not sure how to go on with my life without the man I was suppose to spend the rest of my life with. I fell in love with this man in three days, moved in together within 3 months and have been inseperable ever since. I truely believe he was my soul mate. Even our dog has been laying around since this has happened....it's as if she knows, which I am sure she does. I am looking into support groups to attend soon because I know that I can not do this on my own. Its funny even in his death I am still hiding how much he drank because I don't want others to judge the man he was based on what killed him. Make the time you have with them count, I did and do not have any unfinished business or words that were not shared.

Kprime

Mar 26, 2013

To: sadinreno

In these cases, where they are sleeping and won't wake up, they need immediate medical help. Call 911, or get them to the ER, immediately.

When the liver fails the electrolytes get out of wack. A build up of ammonia will cause brain dysfunction leading to comma, which usually results in death. Potassium may become very low and cause heart failure.

whistlergirl

Mar 29, 2013

To: stevensauntkathy197

Hi, I am a survivor of alcoholic liver failure...I am 32. I had 14 doctors in the hospital, and they discharged me to die...they gave me 7 days and said they did all they could do. That was a year ago. I don't understand why I was spared and so many other young people did not make it. There are more cases of young people passing from this illness than ever. i am sorry for your loss.

Tracklad

Mar 29, 2013

To: Tracklad

Alcoholism is a terrible thing. And VERY VERY difficult to coach a person against. I lost one sister 8 years ago, she just would not stop despite a couple of trips to hospital, despite warnngs.

Eventually her body just had enough. Se passed away quietly in hospital one morning. Told the nurse to call her mother, she was 'going now'.

Now, another sister, seems to have liver disease with affected liver function. Despite being warned by me and others to NOT drink, that eight years ago, at the time of my other sister's passing.

Not helped by a boyfriend who does nothing to stop her, if anything seems to encourage, by going out wth her and bieing there while they drink.

She has effects now, vomiting, abnormal function tests. A little while ago, another sister told her, that she could smell the alcohol on her breath, she claimed that her mouthwash needs changing, it is too strong.

Some thinks its denial, but they cannot fool themselves, they are under some illusion that they are able to fool others.

The hardest thing is trying to get an alcoholic to listen. Do not blame yourself, many try and cannot. A friend of mine used to work with alcoholics, he said he has seen so many things they do to avoid being 'caught'. One person even put the alcohol in a firehose in the garage, so the spouse would not find it.

I have come to the conclusion that it is almost impossible to stop.
'
Best wishes all.

Luz928

Mar 30, 2013

To: All Caregivers and everyone

It's so hard to watch your love one disappear in front of you. I feel helpless and alone. The time is getting close. My husband is in pain and he feels sad all the time. He sleeps all the time and he's gets paracentesis twice a month. They wanted to do it more often, but he's so weak afterwards. We've been married 40 years and I miss so many things we use to do together. He's waiting to be put on a liver transplant . I feel people don't care because they way he got the disease. I think they would treat him much better or be more sympathetic if he had cancer. They are judgmental and have no compassion.
My prayers go out to everyone who's going through this difficult time. Thank you for listening.

namigemi

Apr 03, 2013

I'm new here but I have been following posts since my husband was diagnosed with NASH cirrhois 3 yrs ago and almost died . He has been denied a liver transplant because of also having diabetes and ecemich (spelled wrong ) heart disease and his age is now 3 months from 73. He is living still only because of lactulose but I see drastic changes in his memory and energy (he can not do anything really except sit in recliner and play on his laptop) . I thank God every day for one more day with him even though he has lost the quality of his life. My daughter, age 51, who is actually my husbands step-daughter was also diagnosed with this terrible disease in Feb 2012 but she was an alcoholic. Sadly we lost her Feb 16th of this year when she passed away in her sleep by hemmoraging . I never knew how much pain it would be to lose your child and the grief is truly unbearable at times. It is so important to quit drinking any alcohol if you are diagnosed with cirrhois . My husband drank socially but won't even take a sip anymore.

akhilbhasom

Apr 15, 2013

To: doctor

condition of my relative is very serious..the water inside the body is not going fully as urine..staying more amount of water inside.due to this the body getting bulge .it is because of liver cirrhosis..what i do?

Tinker35

Apr 23, 2013

Mark is still awake and alert, and he is a man on a mission. He asked his Mom to share his story with others, in hopes that it may change someone's life. I think it's a great mission, and I am going to do my part.
Mark and I were married many years ago and had 2 wonderful kids Misty and Nick. Mark was a fun-loving party-goer who loved his beer and marijuana. After a few years, it became a problem... and played a big part in our divorce. After the divorce, the drinking got worse. He and I both eventually remarried and moved on with our lives. The kids adjusted. Their Mom was the level-headed, boring parent and Dad was the fun, exciting, Harley-riding parent. Both kids loved both parents, and both parents loved both kids.
Then Mark got sick. His liver started showing signs of the abuse. Small signs at first...weight loss and fatigue, nausea and vomiting. Gradually the signs got worse. He spent some time in the hospital, and doctors told him to stop drinking or he would die. He tried. He quit for several months, but the temptation was too much. He continued to drink for another year. Last August, everything changed. He landed back in the hospital and nearly died. He had bands placed in his esophogus to stop the bleeding. He was scared, and he finally quit for good. Cold-turkey, with only his family to help him. The kids were (and still are) very proud of him. After his doctors realized he was sober and detemined to stay that way, they made a deal with him. He had to successfully complete outpatient alcohol rehab classes, and he would be placed on a liver transplant list. Everyone was excited. It was a great chance for a new life! Mark enrolled in the classes and actually enjoyed them. He spoke to his class about his liver disease, hoping to make a difference in someone's life. That was important to him.
He had less than 4 weeks of classes left when he was rushed to the ER last week. He was told Saturday that he won't be getting a new liver. He was sent home with Hospice, and has "a few days to a few weeks left". Now our kids are devastated and spending as much time with him as possible. He is 46 years old.
The liver has many jobs. It filters the toxins from your body, helps clot the blood, and plays an important part in digestion/nutrition. A person cannot live without it.
Many people (yes, even some on my "friends" list) enjoy drinking alcohol. I hope you all read this post and understand that alcohol slowly kills your liver. There is a point where the damage becomes severe and permanant. Once that point is reached, it's too late. I can't help Mark recover his life. I wish I could. But I can help him share his lesson.

georgina1003

Apr 24, 2013

I have just come home from visiting my ex-partner of 20 years. He is the father of my 2 boys aged 13 and 11. We split up 3 years ago because as the children were getting older, I couldn't live with his binge drinking and didn't want the children to live it either. He now lives with his mother, who is also an alcoholic. My heart breaks for the sorry state he is in; he is refusing to see a dr. He has obvious jaundice, including his eyes, muscle wasting, hugely distended abdomen, very swollen feet. He passes blood in his stools and has little appetite. He says he does not drink because of vomiting. I have loved him all my life, he is 45yrs old. I know he went down hill when he became registered blind 4 years ago, apparently due to smoking roll up cigarettes without filters for many years. He has battled alcoholism, but always gives in to the demon drink, and I don't know who to talk to. His mother is oblivious to his deterioration. Can I call his gp to visit? I know he would not want to go to hospital, and that he has given up really; I so wished he could have got the help he needed sooner; his boys really need him, and I ache thinking about how to help them cope with the inevitable outcome. I don't know how to find out how long he has left to live, but I have looked on various websites for information about final stage cirrhosis, and feel he is at this point.

Momlor

May 07, 2013

To: All

My husband just died of liver disease. I searched all the websites after he turned yellow and wondered what was going on. He was told 5 years ago that he had liver disease but he kept drinking. He turned yellow on or about March 11 and was dead by April 15. He was taking lactalose and various other medications to clean out his system. On April 14 he started throwing up blood. He just got worse from there and by the 15th he was gone. It was very hard. There were no other symptoms except his turning yellow and having stomach pain. On his death certificate it stated End Stage Liver disease, prognosis months. I am so sorry if you find yourself in this situation. Hold on strong and pray. I am happy that he passed so quickly. The final month was very painful but he wouldn't let on. He didn't want everyone being sad. I can't imagine how painful it would have been if he had to hold on for months. I think it would have been harder on our family. Just make sure to tell your loved one how much you love them as often as possible and how much they mean to you. My last words to my husband were how much I loved him and I would see him later. I did see him but he didn't see me. I was there holding his hand as they tried to revive him. I kept telling him it was OK to go and that I loved him very much. My heart goes out to you if you have to live through this. I am praying for you.

lizsnake27

May 11, 2013

To: all

My only sister died last april 23 2013 because her cancer spread to her liver. Everything happens so fast. she was fighting breast cancer since 2011. We found out that she has liver metastases april first and she dies april 23. It was really painful because we thought that we can still be with her at least until sept. she went to confusion and then coma.