Miss my Mom and Dad

[heartbroken2]

How do you  deal when you loose both of your  parents ?  They were my rock . So  many emotions  to deal with .

[zuka6]

I lost my mum last year, 13th may.It was unexpected and sudden. I have a dad but he's like a strager in my life. I'm about to meet that strager and maybe let him be my family. I'm not sure is that normal, but since I lost the most important being in my life, it's like i'm dreaming a nightmare. I don't feel this reality. I'm only 18 but I made my life feel good as far as possible. It's okey, but it feels empty. I feel so lonley always
When I'm listening my friends about their fights with their parents, all I want to do is punch them in their selfish face. That fight's are normal but knowing that  I don't have parent hurts me a lot and stories about fighting with those whom i lost hurts me even more.

I'm from Bosnia, so forgive me if my english is not good.

[drmom911]

Oh Carl12356, have you thought at all about grief counseling or support groups?  There is so much life to be lived and I would bet that your parents would want you making the most out of every day.

[carl12356]

I have found that everything is far less  colorful since my parents died in 2012. Food taste bland, and the days are gray in color. I.miss them from the moment I wake up till the second before I close my eyes, and my pain is as great today as it was the moment they passed.
Yet, through all that I'm deeply grateful I had them in my life for 48 years and thank God daily for allowing me the honor of having them as my parents.

[untitledforher]

Even though both my parents are still alive on the face of this earth, I don't get to spend much time with them, which will be a great regret later. I can feel sorrow of an eternal parting, although what you feel may be different from what everyone else feels. What you experienced with just them together is now a secret that only you have in your memory and no one else will have, ever. Thus, no one can really feel the exact same emotions because everyone's experience with their dearest people are different. it's something cold that doesn't have to be accepted; you could always believe that the spirit does have a place to go, and there you will meet again. As for my situation, I don't believe in a heaven or hell or god;I'm atheist. Even if hell existed and if that were the only place I could see a dead person I missed again, I would go there.

[PromisedLand]

My Dad died 26 years ago and not a day goes by I don't think of him and miss him...he was such a wonderful gentle man, and thankfully I've picked up those traits..my mother died when I was 8....50 years ago...I don't recall a great deal about her other than her being ill for a long time (breast cancer) and her being involved in school and church activities...just recently I've wondered what life would have been like had she lived.  My Dad remarried 2 years later...too early, I think, as they had a rocky relationship though she had her hands full with 3 young boys.   She died this past March and I still want to pick up the phone and call her, particularly these days as I deal with the loss of my son.


Jim

[suzi-q]

Bee,

I left a post above many months ago, and I agree whole-heartedly with you....My parents are gone 8 years also...I was 33 when dad passed and 4 months later (I was now 34) my mom passed.  It is the hardest thing I ever dealt with, but you do make it through...we are both living proof of that.....

[Bee1955]

My parents died 8 years ago when I was forty five.  They died 4 days apart from each other of unrelated illnesses.  I felt like an orphan, a child who could not believe that Mama and Daddy where not going to be there anymore to take care of me.  My father was my idol and my mom was my security blanket.  It does not matter your age, your parents are your parents and you will always be their child..  I miss them every day, I dream about them and I wish so much I just had one more day.  How I took them for granted, even resented them at times, if I knew then what I know now.  It does get better with time but even though we know our parents will get old and die, we are never prepared.  I love you mom and dad and I am greatfull for every minute I had with you, bad or good.  I carry you with me, pass on your advice and recipies and will forever be your child.

[sissy480]

I lost my moma on june1 2006 I lost dad march 21 2008 it was good friday my life will never be the same I miss them so much i still call out to them in my sleep some days I do not get out of bed my famly are mad at me all the time it is hard  for me to go on. i cry a lot nothing is helping me ..    

[Abbey40]

Hello,  I wish I could tell you something to make you feel better. Both of my parents are gone also. You are right your world is never the same. My father died 7 months ago, in some ways it seems like yesterday, other days it seems like he has been gone alot longer. I would not be truthful if I told you I don't think of him every day. But he suffered so much, (he had Parkinsons Disease). The way I try to get thru it, is by believeing he is at rest now. He also told me before he died that he didn't want me to be sad. He wanted me to live life to the fullest. I do try but there is a void that just can't be filled. I think it is o.k. to cry, it is a part of the healing process. It is good that we have a forum like this where we can help one another, even if we just talk about our lost family members it will help us heal. So I guess that is what we should do is talk to each other. I pray each and everyone of us will be touched by God and he will give us the strenght tocarry on. Bless all.

[Kierra_S]

Today is Januray 20th, 2007. My father passed away prematurely on August 1st, 1981 leaving behind four of us and our mother. Mother passed away in her sleep after fighting her last battle with cancer this last February 24th, 2007. It has opened old wounds because I now feel like father and mother died together. If you feel like me, someday, you'll think of your parents as one entity and greive for them together. My advice: Talk to your parent as mush as you can; talk about when they were a child and how they grew up; talk about how they felt about their parents and talk about their relation with their grandparents. Learn as much as you can about your ancestors; how they lived and how they died. Learn what their favorite foods were; any sayings they used, things they did that they kept secret from their parents. What I am saying is to learn all you can from your parent becauase some day they will no longer be around to tell you any more. And when their time nears, tell them how much you appreciate all they have done for you and how you'll remember all the good times as well as the bad times. And lastly remember to say to them: You are still my parents.. you will always be my parents.  Kierra

[ShirleyAnne]

I lost my father over a year ago. It was unexpected and sudden.

I felt so lonely and cried for days and months.

But what keeps me going is that he doesnt have the burden of social ills and worrisomes of today's lifestyles. Not that i am saying it is best to be dead than alive in this world, but that he has no more worries, pains, sadness, that we all suffer from time to time. And that is some comfort for me. I believe he is resting in peace and that he is a happy person wherever he is.

[jml1986]

I hope things are getting a little better for you. Just know I am here if you need to talk.

[heartbroken2]

Hi thank you for thoughts  .Sorry I haven't post in awhile been  really busy. Just trying to take it one at a time . I really miss them alot . It wouldn't be too bad if i didn't loose them so close together. the death of my mom I will never have the closure I need .The guy who took her away is geeting away with murder. But I'm trying .Thank you again

[jml1986]

I have wondered that myself. I lost my dad 8 years ago but I still have my mom. It crosses my mind often that I don't know how I will cope when they are both gone. I would assume you deal with it as you would with any death of a loved one, one second at a time. I am sure that when you lost the first one, you never thought you would survive the pain you felt, and yet you did. The one thing you have going for you is that you did get through the first loss and you will again get through this one. We are just programmed to do what we need to do, but I for one think the that losing loved one is the one thing in life that totally sucks.

[suzi-q]

I lost both my parents 4 months apart about 8 years ago.  As caregiver said, not a day goes by that you don't think of them..You never get "Over it" you just learn to accept it.  It is a long hard road but you just take baby steps...don't think of the future...it is too difficult when the pain is still so raw.  Just stay in the here and now.  Also, I am sure so much of your parents are still inside and with you.  Whenever you have a question, just ask your heart, what would mom or dad say.....Believe me, even though they are not here, you know exactly what they would say and take if from there.  One day at a time...and baby steps....don't forget that.

[heartbroken2]

I lost my Dad  about year  ago my mom about 7 months ago  my Dad  from cancer Mom murder its hard as hell but I'm trying to take it one step at a time.So many feelings  trying to deal with it all somedays ok somedays too hard . thank you for the advice  

[caregiver222]

My mom and dad have been gone for a long time and a day never passes that I wouldn't cut both arms off to be back with either of them for a few minutes. Times helps, but the pain and hurting never really goes away. I have no answers to mortality. You have my sympathies.