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My dad
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My dad

We lost my dad on October 8th,  he was a sick man and he needed to go, I know this,
I still havent cried, i still cant grieve,  
Tonite i made Turkey pot pie for dinner from scratch,  took me two days to make the stock and get it right.
After dinner,  I took out a tupperware container,  started filling it,  My husband asked me who it was for because most of the family was there,   I looked at him and said,   I'm going to bring some up to dad.
My husband just took the bowl from my hand and held me,   But i still cant cry,   What is wrong with me?
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6 Comments Post a Comment
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I am so sorry for your loss, and what a wonderful husband you have.  You may be in denial, just not able to accept what has happened. Maybe it's time to seek professional help this, because it will catch up with you eventually.  When we don't deal with traumatic events like this, eventually it comes back in the form of anxiety and/or depression. I want to say that maybe you know he's better off and no longer suffering, but I went thru this with a son and the pain was over-whelming. There is comfort in this, but it still hurts us immensely. See a psychiatrist and get referred to the proper therapist. The pain may just be more than you can accept and with losing a parent, it's understandable. I do wish you all the best, and take care or yourself, things will get better.
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Avatar_f_tn
There came a time though when I just sat and cried and cried until I could not cry anymore after my mom died, however, this was not right away. It took some time. Keep in mind not everyone cries during traumatic times such as a death. I do not think that crying means you are not grieving any less than those who are crying. It means you are grieving in your way which everyone needs to do. If the time comes for you to cry then you will and if not, then remember everyone grieves differently...some cry, some do not.

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Thank you both for your responses,  I think it may be time to look into professional help.  Unfortuatly, i am not a stranger to greif,  We have lost so many in my family in the last 5 years,  Losing my Dad is just like the icing on the cake for me i quess.
Thank you both for your support
Karen
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Grief wen someone close to you dies is normal and very personal. And it is grief that helps you recover. Can a therapist erase the grief? Would you want him to? Grief is love.
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Avatar_f_tn
I'm going through the same thing. I lost my mom suddenly on October 23rd. I can't cry. I just don't know how. I go through the motions of everyday life ... just exist. I haven't grieved yet. Your husband sounds very supportive.
I've been told I may still be in shock and to start writing. Unfortunately, I cannot seem to do that. However, it may work for you. Try it. It may help start the grieving process for you.
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I'm dealing with exactly what you're dealing with.  I just lost my dad on Dec. 10th.  We were just starting to get close and he passed.  He had prostate cancer that spread throughout his body.  The cancer was to far advanced for the docs to remove his prostate. Chemo wasn't working.   I haven't even made it past the shock and numb phase yet.
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