so much loss in my life

[lmld1986]

I'm not sure I can cope with it anymore, there's only so much one person can cope with. My

first loss was in the form of a miscarriage at 8 weeks, I thought that was hard enough but nothing compared to what's followed. My nana passed away on 30th april 06 I never really got chance to grieve cause the next day, 1st may 06 my daughter died too.

I then had another miscarriage at 6 weeks at the end of 06, had a few 'good' years but then I lost my mum aged just 52 in feb this year, followed by another miscarriage in may at 12 weeks.

My mums best friend who we spent a lot of our childhood with passed away in june, also young jist 53.

So much death and I feel like I'm falling apart

[TheLightSeeker]

Hi lmld1986.

I'm not going to tell you how sorry I am for your mother's passing, because she's in Heaven and pain -free now. No more pain and suffering for her.
But I do feel sorry for you, as I know how devastating it was and it is , but it does not have to be like this forever!
Please do not feel any guilt nor blame yourself for anything at all regarding your mom. She was OK with leaving this world, even at her young age of 52,  having chosen the peace and glory of eternal life, after all the horrific pain and suffering that she had endured all those years.

Your life does not have to be like the "Run-away Train" my dear.
Please take time to grief and also get in touch with a grief counselor
to help you deal with your grief more effectively.

One very important piece of information that I need to tell you
is that you will pick up from here and move on with your life, however,
there's one huge condition. I have no idea why I'm the messenger, but
anyway here it is: Do Not Try to Save The World, Save Yourself  in order to Save the World! Does this make any sense to you?

Having said this, I intuit that  this also relates to your miscarriages
Stress & Anxiety have a lot to do with miscarriages.
I read a study recently on this subject. Interesting point is that I read
it KNOWING that I would make reference to it in the near future.
It is a field of medicine that usually I don't research.
My daughter on the other hand is a Hypno-birthing Instructor, so SHE would have been more likely to research this.
The study, nonetheless, shows that in pregnancy during periods of  heightened stress there's a chain reaction of stress hormones and dangerous chemicals affecting negatively the uterus and  the fetus with potentially very damaging effects!
This would explain the fact that many women miscarry with NO medical reasons and others have REPEATED miscarriages!
If you want details of the study please let me know. I have them back home  in my office somewhere (I'm 500 miles away now) and I'll be back in a few more days.

I did not intend to hijack your post with this information, but your mom's spirit wants you to be OK with not only her passing, but also with your own life!
It is very important for you to understand that in this life she had so much love for all your family, but she was not physically able to participate
the way she wanted.
All  4 of your children  who passed on -even in the form of miscarriage are Angels- and your mom now is your Spirit Guide.
Once your devastation from this event subsides, you will be able to pick up some subtle signs from them, indicating they're around!

On another note:
There were  many tragic events in the past, long time ago, that took place somewhere close to your family home or where you live now.
Are you aware of any such events?The entire area needs "cleansing".
It's like a bad omen of sorts taking strength and energy from these  tragic events and re-inventing them for the present and the future.
Innocent people suffer, bad things happen and it needs to be stopped.
A godly figure, uncorrupt clergyman-a pure man of the cloth- an energy
healer would be able to clear this area from the influences of the "dark" energies, and let the Light come in!

My thoughts and prayers are with you, at this challenging time of your young life.  It might take you some time to heal, but you will be OK at the end.

God Bless You!
Niko

[iam1butterfly]

I'm really sorry for all that you've been going through.

With the recent death of my mother (she passed away 1 week ago, today). And, the passing of 3 friends within the past month and a half, I totally understand the "falling apart" feeling as I am currently going through a bit of an emotional meltdown myself.

Please feel free to message me if you want someone to talk to.

[MYoungAtHeart]

I can  really relate to your post.  I too have suffered many losses and was at the end of my rope when it came to all of the Death and Loss issues I was facing.

What is important to realize is that Death is a very natural part of life.  We  all have our sadness and misery when death is either inevitable or comes as a complete surprise.  Every day we read the newspaper and see lists of obituaries and stories of people dying and never relate it to ourselves and our own families or our own life.  Then when death does happen, either as a result of old age and a life well lived, or when we lose an unborn fetus, or hear of an accident that involves the end of life for a relative or loved one, we become depressed, scared, sad, anxious, and fearful.

I would love to hear that you have made an appointment with a therapist or faith based counselor or even your family doctor and tell them what you are feeling.  There are many many resources now about  Death and Dying
and perhaps your own library might have some books on the subject that could help you begin to come to grips with your pain.

Good Luck to you and I do wish you the very best.

I am neither a Medical Doctor or Licensed Therapist
Please see your Doctor or Therapist For Professional Advice

M