I have a sex encounter with another man who is HIV+

I’m a 35yo male, 7 days ago I got naked with another man, we kissed for about 20 - 25 minutes (deep kissing with tongue) we fore played with our dicks, I got on top of him and I rubbed my dick on his stomach for about 10 minutes, my penis touched his several times I think, he came and I didn't it, I stayed on top of him for about 5 minutes, his belly had semen on; then I got off him. 2 days later he called me and said he is HIV positive and now I'm freaking out, I have like fever (very mild though) and my lymph’s seem to be swollen, I have no sore throat or anything else. I went to see the doctor 4 days ago and he said the risk was very little since there was no intercourse neither oral sex however I’m still freaking out since I have to wait 3 months from now to get tested and be sure. I've never been with someone who is positive at least that I've been aware of.

Help me out please; are the symptoms I’m feeling an early sign of HIV, or it's only in my mind? I don't know if that guy had any cuts in his mouth, I guess not but I did have a small irritationion in my upper left gum for brushing too hard at he time. Is it possible for me to get infected for what I did? What if some of his cum got into my urethra while I was on top of him?

[Dr Sean Cummings]

Hello,

I think you can relax.

By the sound of things you got semen on your skin. This is not a risk even if he was HIV positive.

As your very sensible doctor has said, the risk is inconsequential with no oral or penetrative sex having taken place.

The symptoms you describe are far too early to be due to HIV.

You can test using a PCR RNA test at 10 days. You can test at 28 days using an HIV DUO test or use an antibody third generation test at 6 weeks - these will all give you greater than 99% accuracy at the specified intervals.

I repeat though that I do not believe you have been put at risk.

best regards, sean

[bjlowe]

Im not expert but from all I know about HIV I would say its not possible to get HIV from the activity you did. Their needs to be sexual intercourse of some kind or contact with blood. You can not catch HIV from touching someone else. The kissing thing is alot nearly impossible I believe. Have you ever heard anyone catching HIV from kissing? No because it doesnt happen.

The mind is a powerful thing and the more you think about it and research it the more you will think you have the symptons. I went through the same thing and all clear.

Im sure a Dr will get on here to help you but I would say its impossible for you to get it from what you say happened.

Good luck!

[Xaviereav]

Thanks for your comment my friend, it made me feel better, you mentioned that you went through a similar siuation, would you mind sharing it with me? I'd appreciate it, thanks a lot

[Xaviereav]

Thank you dr. Cummings for your quick reply, I only have one more question though, I read online that some people do feel early symtoms (symptoms) after getting the virus but it seems that there is some missinformation about it since I read on some web sites that some people feel sore throat, lymphs, cough, etc after a few days and some other web sites say that the symptoms appear on some people after 4 weeks after getting the virus only.

Which one is it then? how long is it take to get symptoms if you get them? thanks again

[bjlowe]

Hi sure I dont mind sharing my experience. I had sex with a prostitute and used a condom and about three days afterwards got a cold. Then I looked up STDs on the net and read about genital herpes and that this was a symptom some people get after. Well then I got scared and kept thinking I felt tingling in my genitals and was constantly looking at it and finding redness and thinking that I must of had it. I convinced myself I had it and it killed me inside.

I went though a bad depression for a week and went to the Doctor and got a test and all clear. Then about three months later for some reason I got scared about it again and researched it on the net endlessly. Some websites made me feel better and others scared me with misinformation. I convinced myself I had it and the test had been wrong. I cried and even nearly told my parents about it as I was so sure I had caught the disease. Well I went for another test and was all clear.

I asked the Doctor a million questions and told her to double check the results and she told me not to worry I had no STDs at all. After this I felt fine and now dont believe I had it.

The bad thing was I consumed myself with reading everything on the net about it and my mind convinced me that I had it. I made myself believe I had symptoms when I really didnt.

As I said the mind plays tricks on you. I read the posts in this forum and see myself back then in all of these men worrying about having caught something. I can now look back on this with a clear head and feel empathetic as I know what they are feeling.

If you are really worried get a test and believe in the results. But as your Doctor said and the Dr Cummings on here there is no chance you caught HIV. It is good however to get one anyway to ease you mind.

Hope that helps...

[Xaviereav]

Hello everyone, this is a follow up.

It's been 23 days since I had that encounter with that guy who turned out to be HIV+ and who was also selfish enough not to letting me know before we kissed, fore played, and touched each other's penises.

I decided to do the PCR RNA test at 14 days as I was adviced by Dr. Cummings on this web site (although he said I should be fine) and so far so good, my results came back negative today. The results took over a week to be ready, so if somebody in my situation decides to do so expect to wait days to get it.

My doctor, the one who ordered the PCR RNA test for me at the lab, also ran an antibody HIV-1 and HIV-2 test today (23rd day) on me, we got the results in 15 minutes and that one also turned out to be negative.

I wanted to share this info with everybody especially if someone feels that my story is similar to yours, my intention is to help you and put your mind to rest.

My doctor said that is practically impossible to get HIV by kissing somebody who has it, even if you deep kiss that person and even if you have a sore in your gums. Now I know that if you fore play with somebody who is HIV+ the chances to get infected are also very low.

He also recommended me to get tested in 4 more weeks to corfirm the PCR test results with an antobody test although he said that the results I got so far are pretty much conclusive. But I'll do it just to be sure and I'll share that info with you guys in time.

I wanted to thank you all for your time and responses, I actually posted my original post a couple of times, on the paid area and the non-paid one too, and I got encouraging responses that I should be fine.