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Avatar universal

Passing hiv

Doctor, I have what I hope is a stupid question. I believe at least however that it's the first time this particular stupid question has been asked of you on this forum.

I had unprotected sex with an Asian sex worker when my wife was 2 months pregnant (yes I know I'm the worst person in the world). I went home and about 3 - 4 hours later had unprotected sex with my wife. I woke the next day with a hangover that was compounded by the guilt and anxiety of what I had done. I was scared so told my wife it was not safe to have sex at this stage of pregnancy and we should wait 2 months. She is from a small village and doesn't speak English so she believes whatever I say.

After much stress I tested negative at 8.5 weeks, 13 weeks and, just for my paranoia, 7 months.

I now have a beautiful little girl and have been trying to put my big mistake behind me. She is now 8.5 months old and meeting all her milestones but is very underweight for her age, just 6.8 kilos (15 pounds). I read that hiv children have this problem.

So my stupid question is this - Is it possible that I picked up hiv from the sex worker and passed it to my wife 3 - 4 hours later and yet did not turn positive myself? I was thinking (stressing) that the virus was 'hanging out' in my urethra and then entered my wife. I read somewhere of people 'seroconverting to negative' and it also made me think it's possible to get hiv but then not turn positive. If that can happen then can such a person pass it on to others?

Thank you doctor, feel free to admonish me for my irresponsible behavior. I'm hoping your answer to this question is something like, 'Are you kidding, get out of here that's impossible! What are you crazy???!!!'

That would certainly help with the anxiety. Thanks again Doctor, you provide a fabulous service on this forum.
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1024580 tn?1331574121
Hello,
Thank you for your post and welcome to our forum.
The answer to your question is NO.  You did not get infected in the first place as your HIV test was negative in the first place.  The only way you could have infected your wife and then your child would have been if you had contracted HIV in the first place.  It is impossible otherwise.  Therefore you are HIV negative, and so is your wife and daughter.
I think that you are still suffering from guilt and that is what you need to deal with, to be able to move on.
Best wishes,
Dr José
Helpful - 1
Avatar universal
Sorry Doc, just gotta ask for clarity. Is it a scientific impossibility that hiv could survive in my urethra and then pass to another person a couple of hours later without me turning positive? Is the inside of the urethra considered 'inside' the body as far as hiv surviving in the body is concerned?

Thanks...
Helpful - 0
Avatar universal
Thanks Doc, you're right about the guilt. I think the best cure for hiv would be for everyone to have a scare like this and they'd never put themselves at risk again!

I appreciate your time... : )
Helpful - 0

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