Aa
Please assess.
Dear Doctor,
On 19th Jan 13, I had one beer. I picked up a CSW. While having sex she pulled my penis out to notice that condom had slipped half way or lesser on my penis. (This was because I went soft as I was not enjoying it because just when we started the reality hit me that I am having paid sex and I am not made for this. Also, please note this is the first time I have had sex ever in my life). She put the condom back in place and after about 10 minutes she pulled my penis out again. She and I sat quiet for a while and she then gave a curious look to the condom and started masturbating me with condom on and then with condom off. She touched the tip of my penis with her fingers a few times while masturbating me. I am not sure if she had any vaginal fluids on her fingers. I put on a second condom and had passive sex (as I would call it) for 5 mins more. I am sure the condom worked well this time. I dont know if the first condom broke or not. Foolishly, I did not check with the first one. It was a Durex latex (kingtex) made in Thailand condom both times. I also did not check the expiry date. I never ejaculated because I never enjoyed.
I quickly washed in running water. I went away.
I have put my body under magnifying glass ever since. Even a sneeze scares the hell out of me. Yesterday I caught cold. Slight fever and nasal congestion. Ever since that night I have felt bug bite itching all over my body. But itching started as soon as 4-5 days after sex and it is intermittent. I am uncircumsized.
So, my questions to you are:
1) What are the odds that I am in danger of HIV (assuming she had the virus to have a conservative approach)?
2) Do I even need testing?
3) In case the answer to Q2. is 'yes' then what is the earliest test that can be taken after sex?
4) Can the danger seep into the condom as a result of slippage/ going soft?
Kind Regards :)
On 19th Jan 13, I had one beer. I picked up a CSW. While having sex she pulled my penis out to notice that condom had slipped half way or lesser on my penis. (This was because I went soft as I was not enjoying it because just when we started the reality hit me that I am having paid sex and I am not made for this. Also, please note this is the first time I have had sex ever in my life). She put the condom back in place and after about 10 minutes she pulled my penis out again. She and I sat quiet for a while and she then gave a curious look to the condom and started masturbating me with condom on and then with condom off. She touched the tip of my penis with her fingers a few times while masturbating me. I am not sure if she had any vaginal fluids on her fingers. I put on a second condom and had passive sex (as I would call it) for 5 mins more. I am sure the condom worked well this time. I dont know if the first condom broke or not. Foolishly, I did not check with the first one. It was a Durex latex (kingtex) made in Thailand condom both times. I also did not check the expiry date. I never ejaculated because I never enjoyed.
I quickly washed in running water. I went away.
I have put my body under magnifying glass ever since. Even a sneeze scares the hell out of me. Yesterday I caught cold. Slight fever and nasal congestion. Ever since that night I have felt bug bite itching all over my body. But itching started as soon as 4-5 days after sex and it is intermittent. I am uncircumsized.
So, my questions to you are:
1) What are the odds that I am in danger of HIV (assuming she had the virus to have a conservative approach)?
2) Do I even need testing?
3) In case the answer to Q2. is 'yes' then what is the earliest test that can be taken after sex?
4) Can the danger seep into the condom as a result of slippage/ going soft?
Kind Regards :)
MEDICAL PROFESSIONAL
You describe symptoms that are most suggestive of anxiety, magnifying minor symptoms or normal body sensations -- nothing that suggests HIV. Re-read my replies above, and see a doctor if you remain concerned about your symptoms. I'm afraid I have no other advice for you: this is not an anxiety support service or one that can replace direct care by a personal physician.
Dear Doctor,
Well I most certainly am trying to move on, however, it seems very difficult to do so practically. I try not to think about this, however any slightest pain in any part of my body triggers the hyper anxiety and I force myself to believe that it relates to HIV. I have been having a lot of anxiety lately.
I have big trouble focussing on my work, and undoubtedly my performance is suffering big time. I am nearing 30 and want to get married soon. I keep thinking of bad things and even cry a lot of times. I see people talking to me, however, I don't hear a word. I am uncomfortable standing in a group. All my concentration is just on thinking about a bad possibility with me related to....you know what. Whenever I see my parents when I reach home I go straight to my room and turn cold. and then all ..'What if' questions keep popping up.
I have constant heavy head feeling with dizziness all day. I felt like nausea today. Felt like my heart beat is very very fast (Haven't gotten my blood pressure checked). Had funny feeling near my right arm pit, like blood is flowing through a vein very fast (Can it be Lymph Node symptom?). I check for things in my mouth atleast 10 times a day. I read your first and second response above atleast 10 times a day. First thing I do every morning is go to the bathroom and have a full face and mouth inspection without fail. I have one or two mouth ulcers.... I felt difficulty in speaking at some part of the day..may be that was nervousness... I don't know.
I force myself to believe that something indeed went wrong that night which I failed to register. I play the whole scene of that night, as much as I remember, to find out any near misses with the danger. I keep asking my self..Did the condom really work fine? that being my only shield...
Now I think I would surely want to test at 4 weeks, however, anxiety (hopefully only anxiety) is killing me each day.
This near right arm pit feeling is really killing me as I type this. It is not painful physically, however, mentally it seems lethal. I also have problem with food pipe..something seems stuck there...or may be it is another ulcer..:(
Please help this crying soul. :(
Please could you advise if these symptoms relate to HIV..
I keep thinking on and on... 'Was that really zero risk? Can I be unlucky somewhere?...no...this does not relate to luck..this is science'......
Well I most certainly am trying to move on, however, it seems very difficult to do so practically. I try not to think about this, however any slightest pain in any part of my body triggers the hyper anxiety and I force myself to believe that it relates to HIV. I have been having a lot of anxiety lately.
I have big trouble focussing on my work, and undoubtedly my performance is suffering big time. I am nearing 30 and want to get married soon. I keep thinking of bad things and even cry a lot of times. I see people talking to me, however, I don't hear a word. I am uncomfortable standing in a group. All my concentration is just on thinking about a bad possibility with me related to....you know what. Whenever I see my parents when I reach home I go straight to my room and turn cold. and then all ..'What if' questions keep popping up.
I have constant heavy head feeling with dizziness all day. I felt like nausea today. Felt like my heart beat is very very fast (Haven't gotten my blood pressure checked). Had funny feeling near my right arm pit, like blood is flowing through a vein very fast (Can it be Lymph Node symptom?). I check for things in my mouth atleast 10 times a day. I read your first and second response above atleast 10 times a day. First thing I do every morning is go to the bathroom and have a full face and mouth inspection without fail. I have one or two mouth ulcers.... I felt difficulty in speaking at some part of the day..may be that was nervousness... I don't know.
I force myself to believe that something indeed went wrong that night which I failed to register. I play the whole scene of that night, as much as I remember, to find out any near misses with the danger. I keep asking my self..Did the condom really work fine? that being my only shield...
Now I think I would surely want to test at 4 weeks, however, anxiety (hopefully only anxiety) is killing me each day.
This near right arm pit feeling is really killing me as I type this. It is not painful physically, however, mentally it seems lethal. I also have problem with food pipe..something seems stuck there...or may be it is another ulcer..:(
Please help this crying soul. :(
Please could you advise if these symptoms relate to HIV..
I keep thinking on and on... 'Was that really zero risk? Can I be unlucky somewhere?...no...this does not relate to luck..this is science'......
Alright! Thanks Doctor!
MEDICAL PROFESSIONAL
Compared to western industrialized countries, being in Vietnam may slightly elevate the chance your massage partner had HIV -- but not by very much, and as I said, even if she were infected, there is no risk from the kinds of exposure you desribe.
It is correct that small leaks in condoms are rare; failure almost always involves overt, wide-open breakage. The other details of your exposure make no difference either. There is no "thin line" between protected and unprotected sex. And I already said that condom slippage is normal, and that protection against HIV is considered complete as long as the head and urethral opening are covered.
So don't over-think it. Just accept the obvious, simple truths and move on.
It is correct that small leaks in condoms are rare; failure almost always involves overt, wide-open breakage. The other details of your exposure make no difference either. There is no "thin line" between protected and unprotected sex. And I already said that condom slippage is normal, and that protection against HIV is considered complete as long as the head and urethral opening are covered.
So don't over-think it. Just accept the obvious, simple truths and move on.
Dear Doctor,
I absolutely believe you. I chose not to go for testing, from medical perspective. I know I am clean.
Out of a little concern... want to tell you that wearing a condom was the only thing that came to my mind to have protected sex. Was that sufficient enough 'smart move'. I did not bother about the sexual positions, time of the acts, wearing the condom the right way (though I believe it was there on my penis the right way)...etc. If protected sex has a whole lot of 'things to do' then there would be very thin line difference between being protected and unprotected. Protected sex will be a very complex process that way. I hope it is not that complex.. :)
Thanks for your reassuring words. Just one additional information..this instance happened in Vietnam. Does it change anything?
Also, I have heard that condoms don't have holes or punctures they just rip apart if they are not good enough during usage. Is it correct?
I absolutely believe you. I chose not to go for testing, from medical perspective. I know I am clean.
Out of a little concern... want to tell you that wearing a condom was the only thing that came to my mind to have protected sex. Was that sufficient enough 'smart move'. I did not bother about the sexual positions, time of the acts, wearing the condom the right way (though I believe it was there on my penis the right way)...etc. If protected sex has a whole lot of 'things to do' then there would be very thin line difference between being protected and unprotected. Protected sex will be a very complex process that way. I hope it is not that complex.. :)
Thanks for your reassuring words. Just one additional information..this instance happened in Vietnam. Does it change anything?
Also, I have heard that condoms don't have holes or punctures they just rip apart if they are not good enough during usage. Is it correct?
MEDICAL PROFESSIONAL
Welcome to the forum.
HIV testing is rarely needed after any single exposure, especially heterosexual -- except when especially high risk, e.g. with a known infected partner. And in this instance the risk is especially low, since it is statistically unlikely your partner had HIV (in the United States, even among the most sexually active women, on average no more than 1 in 1,000 women have HIV); and you used a condom (smart move!). It's hard to miss a ruptured condom; you would have known. And hand-genital contact is never a risk, even when genital secretions are used as lubrication. To your specific question:
1) We don't participate in unlikely speculation, i.e. I do not assume your partner had HIV. But even if she did, this was a no-risk sexual exposure for all practical purposes.
2) From a risk perspective, you don't need testing. Of course you are free to do it if these words don't resolve your fears, i.e. if you need the additional reassurance of a negative test result.
3) The standard antibody tests are reliable after 6-8 weeks; or a duo test (for both HIV antibody and p24 antigen) at 4 weeks. See http://www.medhelp.org/posts/show/1704700
4) As long as the head of the penis and urethral opening remain covered, protection against HIV is complete.
I'm sorry to hear your very first sexual experience has led to such anxiety. But you really need not be concerned. Your risk of HIV is virtually zero.
Best regards-- HHH, MD
HIV testing is rarely needed after any single exposure, especially heterosexual -- except when especially high risk, e.g. with a known infected partner. And in this instance the risk is especially low, since it is statistically unlikely your partner had HIV (in the United States, even among the most sexually active women, on average no more than 1 in 1,000 women have HIV); and you used a condom (smart move!). It's hard to miss a ruptured condom; you would have known. And hand-genital contact is never a risk, even when genital secretions are used as lubrication. To your specific question:
1) We don't participate in unlikely speculation, i.e. I do not assume your partner had HIV. But even if she did, this was a no-risk sexual exposure for all practical purposes.
2) From a risk perspective, you don't need testing. Of course you are free to do it if these words don't resolve your fears, i.e. if you need the additional reassurance of a negative test result.
3) The standard antibody tests are reliable after 6-8 weeks; or a duo test (for both HIV antibody and p24 antigen) at 4 weeks. See http://www.medhelp.org/posts/show/1704700
4) As long as the head of the penis and urethral opening remain covered, protection against HIV is complete.
I'm sorry to hear your very first sexual experience has led to such anxiety. But you really need not be concerned. Your risk of HIV is virtually zero.
Best regards-- HHH, MD
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