Welcome to the forum. Thanks for your question.
I'm sorry to hear about the bad luck in regard to genital herpes. It's quite unusual to be infected after only a couple of sexual exposures. Is it clear you acquired herpes from this particular partner? Oral or genital? With HSV-1 or 2? (The type has bearing on HIV risk.)
If your partner knew he had herpes and didn't say anything, I can understand your trust issue. However, most genital herpes is transmitted by people who are entirely unaware of their infections, in which case failure of trust is unrelated to transmission.
In itself, having genital herpes does not suggest there is a high chance your partner has HIV. The overall rate of HIV is not significantly higher (in the US) in people with or without herpes. Regardless of herpes, if your partner has no special HIV risk factors (injection drug use, sex with other men) and is not African American, the chance he has HIV is under 1 in 10,000. Nurses and other health workers have no higher HIV rates than anyone else.
Had you asked before now, rather than having multiple HIV tests, I would have simply suggested you ask your (former) partner to have an HIV test, If negative, it would prove you were not exposed or infected. (You might still consider doing that, if it would help reassure you.) In any case, your negative test results prove for sure you don't have it. You were rather seriously overtested (out of anxiety, I assume); a single blood test at 6 weeks or more after the last exposure would have done it. Although official advice remains 3 months for definitive HIV antibody testing, in fact 6-8 weeks almost always is sufficient; this is discussed in the thread linked below.
http://www.medhelp.org/posts/show/1704700
Even in the smallest of small town clinics and laboratories, all tests done in the US are at least "third generation" and are highly reliable by 6-8 weeks. Finally, there are no medications or infections, including anti-herpes drugs, new herpes, or development of HSV antibodies, that have any effect on HIV test reliability or seroconversion time.
As for your symptoms, they are not at all suggestive of HIV; and anyway, HIV test results always overrule symptoms. Even if you had a typical HIV syndrome, your negative blood tests still prove you don't have HIV.
So all is well in regard to HIV. You don't need any further testing, unless you need the extra reassurance that might come from a final negative antibody test at the officially recommended 3 month interval.
I hope this has helped. Best wishes-- HHH, MD