risk from vaginal fluid in her mouth then french kissing

I met a girl at a club. I fingered her with two fingers then she sucked my fingers. Then she may have swallowed.  Then after 3 seconds we frenched kissed for about 10 seconds. Then i went to wash my face and rinse out my mouth. I kissed her thorought the evening. Later at the hotelshe gave me oral for10 seconds . We did not have sex. I touched the shaft of my penis with the finger that i had used to finger her with which may have been damp. Within 2 min I was in the shower and scrubbing. The girl was concerned about my hiv status and said she got tested every year. She said she was completly healthy. Apparently she was in a long term relationship with an out of state boyfriend. I dont know if i should believe her. What do you think is my overall risk. I am mostly concerned about my kissing with vaginal fluid. Please help I am very worried about this.

[H. Hunter Handsfield, M.D.]

Welcome to the forum. Thanks for your question.

Just a few days ago I answered a question with a blog-like reply that explains some things about the biology of HIV and STD transmission.  Like yours, that question was also about kissing, although my reply discussed transmission risks in general.

http://www.medhelp.org/posts/STDs/Short-lip-tot-lip-kiss--risk-of-syphilis/show/1861534

As for the specific exposure you describe, it's absolutely no risk for HIV.  First, it is statistically extremely unlikely your partner had HIV, well under one chance in 1,000.  Second, HIV is never transmitted by kissing and rarley if ever by oral sex -- and that includes consideration of billions of sexual events that undoubtedly involved exactly the sequence you describe, genital to hand to mouth and then back to mouth or genitals.  Even with entirely unprotected vaginal sex, if your partner had HIV the average risk to you would have been once for ever 2,000 exposures.  Given that, and also considering the dilution effect -- the amount of vaginal secretions that would by on your fingers, the amount of that which would get into her mouth, then the amount that would be transferred back to you -- it is simply implausible.  I'm sure such a transmission even has never happened.

In other words, there is absolutely no reason to be "very worried about this".  You should entirely forget the event.  You do not need testing for HIV or any other STD, and if you have a regular partner, you can safely continue unprotected sex without worry of transmissing HIV/STD.

I hope this has helped.  Best wishes--  HHH, MD

[stupidmf]

Thanks for the quick response! I have been wrought with anxiety to the point where i had to go back on antidepressants and have been struggling to cope. I had a sore throat and i think some lymphnode swelling in the neck on the begining of week three and it went away. and then at the begining of week four stomach and hyper bowel sounds to include 1 bout of diarrhea (all other stools normal). No fevers no rash. Of which i have attributed this all to hiv, naturally cause of my fear. You believe that these are related to stress. I did test rapid at 3 weeks. It was non reactive. Could stress cause these symptoms and what would diarrhea associated with seroconversion be like?

[H. Hunter Handsfield, M.D.]

Sounds like you caught a cold (maybe from your kissing partner) but not HIV.  Acute HIV would not cause a single bout of diarrhea.  Stress could cause some of your symptoms as well.  And on top of all that, a negative HIV test at 3 weeks is itself moderately reassuring, probably around 80% reliable.

Trust me on this:  there is simply no way you caught HIV from the events you have described.

[stupidmf]

Thanks Doc. I will try and forget about this event. But like all the other people who worry alot on these forums I will test at 3 months just to be sure. But thanks for your reassurance. I wasnt going to post but I couldnt find any like answers to my unique situation. Have a Merry Christmas.

[H. Hunter Handsfield, M.D.]

Thanks for the thanks.  Take care.

[stupidmf]

Got tested today took a rapid test. 5 weeks. Whats the reliablity of that? 90% ?Got nervous and took the test again cause of the stomach /bowel hyperperistalsis and borborgymi.

[stupidmf]

The result non reactive.

[H. Hunter Handsfield, M.D.]

Of course it was.

That will end this thread; I won't have any further comments or advice.

[stupidmf]

Three months negative. Thank God. For all the internet worried wells out there who have a simular story. I have ruined the joy of the last 3 months. Do not do the same! God Bless and good luck!