Please help

Help me please i am so scared. i cant ask on the teak forum because he will say no risk. 2 Years ago i gave oral sex to a man when i was drunk, all symptoms at 11 Days including swollen glands, rash etc etc. Then a week later partner had same symptoms. our kids were not ill. this was two years ago, my groin glands have been hurting ever since on and off, yesterday my partner told me her groin hurts, she has no knowledge of the exposure. i am now suicicdal, what if i have infected her?

[Apollo1971]

You cannot give somone somthing you dont have. You already know oral sex is not a risk of HIV transmision. Your feeling of guilt has created this problem based on symptoms speculation rather than facts.

So if you cannot accept you didnt have a risk then just take a test now and your results will prove your status, and please dont say your to scared, thats not going to wash because that is only answer to resolving this for your sanity and i fear plain facts will and have not helped so far.

[Cantlivewithmyselfanymore]

I wish it was that easy. i am terrified. i had every symptom, rash, fever, swollen glands, loss of appetite, diarrhea. i even had petechia and a herals pink patch on my face. when my partner got sick a week later she had the same plus a white vaginal discharge. i also had a bubble rash inside my elbow. please help i AM to scared to test. i feel like the walls are closing in on me. i dont want her to be hurt and how can she be feeling symptoms due to anxiety when she is unaware. do you know ofanother illness that would cause these symptoms? is joggen here please

[Apollo1971]

Their are 100's of other conditions that can make you feel unwell like this,for eg, stress and anxiety?? but hiv has NO specfic symptoms anyway.

If she is unwell then she needs to see a doctor, because she may well be ill buds, but putting your head in sand will resolve nothing at all.

Fact- you did not have any risk of HIV
Fact- If you cannot belive all the 1000's of threads on this site and the HIV experts advice that oral sex is not a risk then the only other option is to test for peace of mind.

Of course their is always the chance of an std, so you could or should test for that just to rule them out.

[Cantlivewithmyselfanymore]

Are you british? you are very helpful. i know you are right about hiv, the thought comes and goes every few months. there are so many other websites that are full of crud, i try and stick to medhelp for peace of mind. i know the studies must be right but then another part of me says it must be hiv, it doesnt help that every symptom has hiv straight after it in google. when i read about the herald patch and the blister rash on elbow i totally freaked out as the site said "When u see this it is definitely hiv"

[Apollo1971]

Hiya yes im british, or english as well like to be called lol.

Oh man, google share is google scare. Its got so much rubbish about HIV and symtoms (symptoms). For eg, you have a runny nose, google that and its HIV lol. A common cold and even sitting in a hot sauna gives you a runny nose :)

The HIV doctor experts who many get their knowlage from and certainly use for regular reference all agree that HIV is not passed on via oral sex and take in mind they must see a 1000 cases a month..

Trust in the facts chap, you really were not at risk.

[Cantlivewithmyselfanymore]

Thanks a lot mate. i am a brit aswell. i can't promise i won'T freak out and come back but you have really alleviated a tonne of pressure off my shoulders. my mate came back from thailand and he said the doctor told him he was at high risk for receiving oral, what a joke. thanks again for your time

[Apollo1971]

No problem buds. :-)

[Cantlivewithmyselfanymore]

Hi Apollo. just to settle my mind. hat are the odds of getting  hiv from oral with no ejaculate, then transfering it within a week to my partner after 2 acts of intercourse ith no ejaculate? please dont be mad, knowing i would be more likely to meet elvis would help. thanks mate

[Apollo1971]

Their are no documented cases in 30 years, so your not goin to be the first.

[Cantlivewithmyselfanymore]

Apollo how come the doctors on medhelp are now saying there have been cases of hiv by oral sex but just none from receivng. they are now advising to test, has the medhelp stance on oral sex now changed?

[Apollo1971]

I have not seen that quote, which thread are you looking at?

Infact i saw  this today, so have to disagree with your comments..

I'm sorry that you continue to worry about this exposure.  I have reviewed your nearly 30 other exchanges on of HIV Prevention Community sites and agree with all that has been said before.  Your encounter was NO RISK for HIV- no one has EVER gotten HIV from receipt of oral sex and your testing CONCLUSIVELY PROVES that you did not get HIV.  Further testing is a waste of time and money.  My sincere advice is that you need to seek medical help in addressing your unwarranted continuing anxiety rather than pursue further testing.  EWH





H. Hunter Handsfield, M.D.

Jan 08, 2013
..


Welcome to the forum.  Thanks for your question.

This may be one of those in which the question itself contains most or all information required for an accurate response.  As a general rule, an oral sex exposure never warrants HIV testing.  The risk of HIV transmission by oral sex is extremely low, maybe truly zero for most exposures.