can't convince myself

I had a low risk exposure giving oral to a ts of unknown status.  I am married.  The event was back in early march.  I have tested with oraquick rapid at 4.5, 6.5 8.5 and 13 weeks.  Also did clearview stat pack finger pricks at 11.5 and 18.5 weeks.  All negative but still having doubts about the accuracy of rapid tests.  It doesnt help that i had a bad respiratory infection at 4 weeks and have one now.  My wife is now complaining of fever and aches.  How accurate are the rapids? I would imagjne that 2 different tests several after three months should have sufficed. But still nagging at me.  Thanks for your consideration.

[Apollo1971]

First, your incorrect, oral sex is not low risk its just not a risk buddy. I have never known a case of HIV transmission from it.

Ok your test results, all 6 of them. 100% accurate even if you had a risk. Your 13 and 18 week tests are conclusive. Rapid tests are FDA approved because they are over 99% reliable. Before you start to pick the bones, the 1% is because of false positives but never false negatives, i have never seen one and certainly not with all your tests you have taken.

Before you mention your wife, well you cannot give her what you dont have, so its just a coinsidence - period.

[paranoid5150]

I know i am way over reacting because of guilt and i objectively have nothing to worry about.  It is just that the what ifs are killers.  You are probably the 10 th person to explain this to me .  I have to put this behind me.  You are doing a great service for all of us.  J appreciate your confirmation of the testi,ng accuracy.  

[Apollo1971]

Hey no problem, guilt is often the creation of many concerns but we all make mistakes and this is somthing you have to put behind you and in time it will ease, but for now have faith that all is well :-)

[paranoid5150]

I had yet one more test at 26.5 weeks with clearview complete this time.  Negative again.  At 21 days after last sex with wife she has nausea for 4 days with fatigue.  Of course all the fear has come back.  Any suggestions on how to find a counselor?  At this point i dont even know if a lab based test will ease my concern.  Thank you.

[tad780]

Believe in what Apollo is saying to you as his words and those of the other moderators are based on science and numerous studies. It has been stated before that if oral sex was a concern then think of the huge numbers of infections that would be happening. I know what anxiety is all about, more specifically HIV anxiety. It seems as it is way too common than it should be. Seeking out a counselor is totally the thing to do. First find out if your place of employment covers this and go from there. If not, it is easy to locate good psychologists etc.   You DO need this and I promise that it has helped me alot to gain my perspective. I am not 100% but I can make myself believe in the facts and I thank people like Apollo and others help to get there. Let your guilt go my friend, for most of us, this is where the problem exists.