HIV Prevention Community
10 Months terrified to test
About This Community:

If you believe you have been exposed to HIV and want help to judge your risk, would like advice about HIV testing, or have questions about the effectiveness of condoms or risks associated with specific sexual practices, this is the site for you.

Font Size:
A
A
A
Background:
Blank
Blank
Blank
Blank Blank

10 Months terrified to test

I'm a 25 year old, heterosexual, african american male. I have strictly practiced safe sex. In Sept 12, I met a woman online (27, african american). We decided to hook up, she explained that she preferred unprotected, stating that she had an IUD and had never had any STDs. Although this reassured me, I insisted that she purchase condoms, which she did. I performed unprotected oral on her and she performed unprotected oral on me. We alternated between unprotected oral and protected vaginal about 5 times. On the fourth time the condom broke and the head of my penis was exposed for a minute or two. we finished with a new condom and she left. After reading about a woman intentionally giving men HIV I went into a really deep and obsessive depression. She reassured me several times that she was HIV negative but I cant bring myself to get tested. 2 weeks after the exposure I thought I had a fever, I would have a recurring sore throat, the joints in my hands began to ache. The more I read the more panicked I became. Now nearly a year in, I'm still afraid. She has long since changed her number and I can't locate her. Now I spend hours a day researching HIV on my phone and laptop.

My hypochondria and latrophobia has kept me away from doctors for over a year now and began about 9 months prior to this encounter. Counseling has helped some, I was able to go have an eye exam. But I just cant find the strength to get tested. I've been suffering from Sebhorreic dermatitis and I've had it most of my life on my scalp, but now it's in my eyebrows, I rub and check them constantly. Every twinge, every pain sends me into a tailspin. I just dont know if my life is really over. I'm not looking for sympathy because I was stupid, but I just dont know where else to turn.
Avatar_m_tn
Test, that is the only way to know your status. No forum can help you.
Blank
Post a Comment
To
Blank
Weight Tracker
Weight Tracker
Start Tracking Now
HIV Prevention Community Resources
RSS Expert Activity
469720_tn?1388149949
Blank
Abdominal Aortic Aneurysm-treatable... Blank
Oct 04 by Lee Kirksey, MDBlank
242532_tn?1269553979
Blank
The 3 Essentials to Ending Emotiona...
Sep 18 by Roger Gould, M.D.Blank
242532_tn?1269553979
Blank
Control Emotional Eating with this ...
Sep 04 by Roger Gould, M.D.Blank
Top HIV Answerers
186166_tn?1385262982
Blank
LIZZIE LOU
Auburn, AL
Avatar_m_tn
Blank
chipdawg
Thailand
Avatar_m_tn
Blank
rocket27rocket
London, United Kingdom
Avatar_m_tn
Blank
Midnight_Sun
Avatar_m_tn
Blank
Jcc1970
KY
366749_tn?1370585676
Blank
diver58
Karachi, Pakistan