HIV risk from oral sex and fingering in Manhattan strip club

Dear Doctor,

About 3 weeks ago, I went to a very high end strip club in Manhattan with co-workers.  I got a private room with a dancer and she performed oral sex on me.  I’m a married man and I shouldn’t have let this happen but it did and I have to live with it.  I did not ejaculate in her mouth.  During the oral sex, I used my fingers to penetrate her vagina.  At one point, I believe I spit on or put my fingers in my mouth to get more lubrication.  These are my questions:

1. From reading posts on this and other forums, I believe I am at low-to-no risk for HIV from receiving oral sex.  Is this accurate?
2. My main worry is from the fingering.  Not so much from inserting my fingers but then putting the fingers in my mouth.  This was not immediate (i.e., I was not going from her vagina to my mouth quickly and it was perhaps once and at most twice).  This woman was from the West Indies or Guyana.  What are my risks and how soon can I get tested?

As I said I shouldn’t have let this happen.  I am happily married and I am very worried and lose focus often just on the thought that I could be potentially carrying and transmitting this virus to my wife.  Any help would be greatly appreciated.

Tribeca Joe

[happydaze]

1.  Yes,  No risk.
2.  Fingering has NEVER been a risk.  Period.  Not one person in the history of the HIV epidemic has been infected this way.  I daresay you will not be making history.  Not a risk.

Your guilt for cheating on your wife is driving you anxiety.  There is nothing on this forum that we can help with your guilt.  Your got head and played with a vagina..  Get over it.  Your issues have nothing to do with HIV.  Please move on.

[happydaze]

Oh yeah.....the fact that the woman was from Guyana/West Indies is irrelevant.  The fact that she was from Guyana didn't stop you from putting your penis in her mouth or your fingers  in her vagina and then your mouth.  Why should it matter that she's from Guyana now after the fact.  Bottomline:  People are not risky, behaviors are risky.  You shouldn't go around insinuating that because a person is from a certain place then they are somehow suspicious of having HIV or any other disease.  More people from Guyana or West Indies are HIV negative than positive.  

Assume responsibilities for your own actions, get better educated about HIV and always engage in safe sex with all people whose status you do not conclusively know.  IF you do that you will avoid HIV infection.