I am terribly scared of being infected HIV

About 4 weeks ago I ahd a sexual contact with the boy of about 21-25 years old in the Netherlands. I even paid him but he is not a sexual worker.  

The facts are:

0. He told me that he is clean, no hiv. He also told me that he is checking himself every 6 month. But who knows?
1. Mutual masturbation. I touched his penis, he touched mine.
2. No insertion sex, I mean no penis-to-anal or penis-to-oral contacts from either of partners. So we did only masturbation. But it could be possible that some of his liquid touched my penis, although I do not remember.
3. I had a small wound or cut on one of my finger. I am pretty sure that it was not bleeding. It appeared about 24 hours before the sexual contact and even that time it was not bleeding (at least I did not see the blood). So it was more like a scratch I think. But who knows about microcracks?
4. The boy did not have much precum or maybe it was so small amount and therefore I spitted a bit of my salvia and wetted the head of his penis. So, I might touched my lips with my fingers (and there potentially could be some of his liquid).
5. We did not have a french deep kissing, but touched lips-to-lips perhaps not more then two-three times. I do not like kissing man.  
6. He cummed on his stomach, then I cummed on his leg. I think my penis did not touch his semen, but I do not remeber for sure.
7. He told me that he is clean, no hiv. He told me that he is checking himself every 6 month.
8. I also put a condom on one of my fingers and sticked in his *** and massaged him for some minutes.
9. Now after 4 weeks and 2 days I have the following symptoms: a fever (I guess around 37.5C) for 2 days. Some muscle pain also lasted for 2 days. I have sore throat (pain when I swallow) started with the fever and already continues for 5th day. So now no fever no other sypthoms but soar throat. Sometimes (though not often) I cough with phlegm. No heavily running nose, but some nosal liquid which i swallow from time to time. So the sypthoms are not very havy, normally I have them more pronounced when I have cold or fleu.


Doctor, what is my risk? I have already ask a doctor on this forum but I would like to get a second opinion, if possible.
it is possible that in my description of what has happened, I missed some details. The only thing for sure I know is that it was not penetrative sex.
You know, I cannot work, cannot talk to my wife, I am desparately scared. I avoid sex with her and she is worring.
Thank you. Sorry for the long mail

[ricky_id]

Our opinions are just the same with the doctors': Non-penetrative sex never poses HIV risk.

[rus_fr]

Thanks for teh reply. You also think that no testing needed?

What makes me anxious is my symptoms. Normallt the throat pain progresses and finally turns into a running nose. But this time, no running nose, some nasal liquid I swallow from time to time. So now after 4 days it is only throat pain, no other sympthoms.

[diver58]

You do not need any tests for the exposure described. Forget symptoms, they have many reasons, other than HIV. Your risk is non existent.

[ricky_id]

If you have HIV fear by now, try consulting about your symptoms at http://www.medhelp.org/forums/HIV-Anxiety-Support/show/595 or seek mental help for that. But if you don't have any HIV fear or the symptoms don't ease along with your fear, try to consult a doctor.

But your symptoms are definitely not due to HIV if this intercourse is your only concern.

[rus_fr]

yes, this intercourse is my only concern. I will try the link you suggested. Thank you.

[rus_fr]

what if my penis toched his semen...

[ricky_id]

HIV immediately becomes inactive/uninfectious if it comes to contact with the air and will eventually die, no matter in semen, blood, food, drink, etc.

[rus_fr]

but in the semen liquid it must be alive for some time? I eman it is nto a drop or two, it is quite an amount. Well, I think nobody measured this..  

[ricky_id]

The semen will have spread first, and then the HIV inside immediately will have become uninfectious.

While HIV is worrisome, it is very weak in nature.

[rus_fr]

Ok, I see.

Now I have runny nose and yet throat pain. No fever. No other sypmthoms.

[ricky_id]

Your symptoms are not due to HIV if this is your only concerned 'risk'. Please read my 2nd comment for this.

[rus_fr]

Ok, I am not sure I understand your "if this is your only concerned 'risk'".
I mean I concern about the sexual contact I described above.  

[rus_fr]

Ok, I am not sure I understand your "if this is your only concerned 'risk'".
I mean I concern about the sexual contact I described above.  

[ricky_id]

I used apostrophe because that intercourse doesn't count as HIV risk.

[rus_fr]

Ok, understood.

[nursegirl6572]

Your problem isn't HIV...it is guilt over having a sexual encounter with a man behind your wife's back.  Either get professional help to deal with that, or the anxiety will continue to be a problem.

You had NO risk at all for HIV....period, end of story!

[rus_fr]

I do not know..
I have my fever back (about 37.2C=98.96F). I thought it was gone last Saturday.. Now it is evening and it is back..
I am really scared, do not know what to think about it. :(. It is not usual I beleieve.

[Teak]

You had NO risk at all for HIV

[rus_fr]

Teak, you and the Doctors say basically that my risk to get HIV in that event was zero (of course based on my description of what has happened). In other words, if I test myself, the result will be negative (provided that I did not not have any other sexual contact. And I did not).
But how sure can we all be? You confidence is based on what? Statistics, similar cases..? I mean can I just forget and go on?

[rus_fr]

By the way, by "mutual masturbation" I mean that I mastrubated him, and he masturbated me. Was it clear for the Doctor and you from the message? I hope it was.

[nursegirl6572]

98.6 is a normal temp, which varies all the time, you do not have a fever.

The risk assessments you were given was based on facts!  You aren't going to be the first person to get HIV from mutual mastubation!

[ricky_id]

Of course, that's what we mean with mutual masturbation too. Even oral sex doesn't pose HIV risk, so why should mutual masturbation? Sure you can move on.

[rus_fr]

It was 98.96F and later 99.32F, normal for me would be around 97.9F.
Strange sympthoms I had last night: still some throat pain, pain in my eye balls when I rotate, I also feeled like a pressure in my nasal sinusis.
Then I took paracetamol in the morning. I have some green color dischareges from my nose and cough. Hope it is a cold or flu.

Well, can you say that if continue with only mutual masturbation with different males and females, there would not be any risk for hiv regardless their status?

And there was not only mutual masturbation, there was some fingering (though I hope protected) and kissing.

[Teak]

You never had a risk. Move along.

[ricky_id]

FYI, HIV is only transmissible through: unprotected vaginal/anal sex, sharing needle, and from mother to infant.

[rus_fr]

"Your problem isn't HIV...it is guilt over having a sexual encounter with a man behind your wife's back"

I think the guilt is nothing compared to the possibility of being infected.
These sympthoms and particularly fever drives me crazy :(.

[Teak]

You never had a risk of possibly being infected.

FORUM GUIDELINES
* Anyone who continues to post excessively, questioning a conclusively negative result or no-risk situation, will be subject to action by MedHelp. Conclusively negative results or a no-risk situation will be based upon the criteria established by MedHelp’s doctors. Action will be taken as follows:
    * After excessive posting, a warning will be issued by MedHelp
    * Continuing to post regarding the negative result / no risk situation will result in a 3 day suspension
    * Continuing to post upon your return will result in a permanent ban.

[ricky_id]

If the feeling of guilt persists, you can try to get over it on http://www.medhelp.org/forums/HIV-Anxiety-Support/show/595. Sorry, but we only assess HIV risks here. But if you don't have problem with fear and the symptoms still last, go consult a doctor.

But based on your story, our assessment is the same: You didn't have HIV risk.

[rus_fr]

One more sympthom I did not mention as I thought was not important. But even I do not have fever now, it still exists.
I felt and am feeling something like  "burning" in my armpits. It does not really hurt, not a real pain. But some uncomfortable feeling. Could it be related to lymph nodes - I do not know, but scares me...

[ricky_id]

Pls visit a doctor for that. You didn't contract HIV from that intercourse.

[LIZZIE LOU]

dont need a list of your symptoms.   the FACT that you never had a risk PROVES that your symptoms are NOT hiv related.

[rus_fr]

Then what are they....
I had to tell that I did mutual masturbation with two different boys with about 24 hours between. I did not tell these details because what we did was teh same inboth acses - mutual masturbation, some kissing, *** fingering. Not a penetrative rectal or oral. I am not sure how this details are important. I guess it will nto change your opinion.

[LIZZIE LOU]

does not change anything...

work with your dr if you are having health concerns...its not hiv related, and therefore not a concern of this forum.

kindly move along...you do NOT have a hiv concern.

[rus_fr]

Dear All,

tested NEGATIVE after 8 weeks!
I thank you so much for your answers and patience and sorry for excessive posting.