Im 17 yrs old and so afraid, im going through all this by myself, pray for me!!!!!1

[Lifestyles]

I had a risky encounter in january giving a man unprotected oral sex but protected anal sex, a few weeks pass and i suddenly get these ARS symptoms including fever,chills,abdominal pain,diahrrea, but i dont rememebr a rash. The ARS symptoms then go away and a few months later my tonsils began to swell with white streaks of puss and my lymhnodes in my neck are a tad bit swollen, eventually the lymphnodes in my neck goes down but my tonsils still remained swollen but the white streaks have gone away.I went to the doctor several times and got tested for strep but both times they came back negative, the doctor told me to come back because the step bacteria cold be hiding somewhere else in my throat under my tonsils maybe. The feeling of something being stuck in my throat came a few weeks ago but went away. As of today i feel sick my lymphnodes in my neck are swollen and my neck feels tight, i am tired alot, i get dizzy and my heart beats so fast, my abdomin feels funny when i press on it from the pressure im applying. I have a white tongue but i dont think its thrush because it doesnt come off and it doesnt bleed when i brush it i also have this white like fungi looking thing on the roof of my mouth.oh yea my eyes feel heavy and when i breathe i have to take these long deep breaths to feel like i've gotten a great deal of oxygen in me, im just so scared and i don't wanna be sick like this anymore. Im only a 17 year old male and i have a life to live?? Do anybody kno of these symptoms happening in ARS, and what is the normal life expectancy of an HIV+ person if they take their meds on time, excersize, eat an healthy diet and if you have HIV will it turn to AIDS even if you are taking your meds and there working properly. How long can you live even if your HIV turns to AIDS but your still taking your medicine and it works????

[OrionQuest]

Told you so.

[SillyStupid]

Yesterday I leveled with my girlfriend, it was no walk in the park but it seems we'll be able to works things out. I realize that most of my HIV-fears have been fuelled by the incredible guilt I have felt towards her and the henious act I have commited. I'm still unnerved about what a positive test might mean but I do realize that the chances of me being infected are close to non-existent. Dr. Bob answered me to the same degree and I will probably calm down in time.

Thanks for all the support.

[jddkdd]

FYI.....if you haven't seen it, here's what Dr. HHH says about the risk:

"I never go to the support forum, because I don't have the time or energy to get involved in (or even read) what I expect are mostly emotionally driven discussions. But you can tell them I said that with respect to HIV (and for most STDs), oral sex is basically safe sex. Are there exceptions? Of course, but rare enough to be ignored. People also get hit by lightning. If all vaginal and anal intercourse disappeared and were replaced by oral sex as the only sexual practice, HIV/AIDS would disappear from the world as infected persons aged (and as some died). Almost no new HIV infections would occur, except by injection drug use and similar risks.

This is my only comment on it. I'm not going to get into any further discussion of it, directly on the support forum or any follow-up comments here."

He's basically saying it doesn't happen.

[MelvinG1]

I don't think he is experiencing ARS, it sounds like he got some other type of virus, and his anxieties, depression, stress and all this worrying is just making it worst and complicated I was there, so I know, most of his symptoms, i'll say the majority of them I had them In May, and I took my HIV test at 91 days and 103 days both negative, I thank GOD for that!!! Did he get tested? it's past his 3 months, I know he'll be alright and I know his test will come back negative. Symptoms don't mean anything, and i can prove it and hundreds of other ppl here and in thebody.com have shown similiar symptoms 3 months later they are whooo hooooing from happiness HIV NEG.

[Teak]

My advice is still the same.

[Teak]

"Who said that they were infected by fellatio." Stay off the internet and you won't have half the problems you bring upon youself.

[SillyStupid]

You have nothing to comment about the things I wrote above? Is your advice still the same?

[SillyStupid]

I understand that only a test will give me the definitive result. But it's only been 10 days now and I've got like 32 days to go minimum. I simply do not know if I can take this - every day I read about HIV and post and read posts and fight this panic and fear that permeate me. Yesterday I was almost fine, then I started reading AidsMeds "Living with HIV" forums and I came upon these people who have been infected by giving fellatio... I fell apart again.

[SillyStupid]

Teak, what I believe is that MoltenStorm (see http://forums.poz.com/index.php?topic=1963.0) was struck by lightning, so to speak. I wouldn't even be worried if after I brushed my teeth approx. 20 minutes after the fellatio I gave (without ejaculation or deep throating) I noticed a slight gum bleeding behind the top front teeth (it stopped as soon as I dried it with a tissue). I have no idea if this bleeding was there when I was giving fellatio (I have no reason to think so but I'm not sure - I did spit multiple times into a tissue after, I saw nothing), I have no idea if it came about after I brushed. My gums in question don't normally bleed and I have generally pretty good oral health. The blowjob I gave was very gentle.

I plainly and simply do not know how and why this small bleeding occured, and I'm driving myself sick with worry. Especially after reading MoltenStorm's story... Is it possible it was just my mouth's response in regards to changes in condition in it? Is this in any way normal? I just don't know, I can't remember and I worry so, so much.

[OrionQuest]

Dude, I think some issue here is also you don't trust yourself.  Hence, you find it hard to trust anything at all.  Here's another angle: there's nothing you can do now except wait out the window period and test IF YOU LIKE.

Again I have to say this.  HIV is not a punishment from God, nor is being safe from HIV a divine reward.  HIV is a virus caught in very specific circumstances.  Some of these circumstances are so high risk that infection is almost inevitable (blood transfusion).  Some have so infinitesmally small risk that it's not worth considering.  Your risk was closer to the latter than the former.  

But how to really, truly, confirm a negative? By testing.

[Teak]

We can't make you believe. People like you won't believe your tests either. There is nothing we can do. All we can do is give you the facts based on scientific studies and that's it. Now go test collect your negative result and be done with it.

[SillyStupid]

I'm sorry, but I don't believe you. I'm not saying that there is zero chance in fellatio for contracting HIV, no expert says that. I understand there is a very low risk involved. But I'm not comfortable with the advice given out on AidsMeds that reads "No need to test over this [oral] incident" since you have people on that very same board who claim they have been infected in this very manner!

[Teak]

There is another one that won't put the real risks that he has had. Like it has been said to you before if you want to test, test go collect your negative result and move on. I noticed you didn't mention any of the serocouples that have had sex from many years, protected vaginal or anal sex and unprotected oral. None have became positive. They would be the highest risk people there are for contracting HIV if oral was transmitted in that manner.

[SillyStupid]

"There are no one on the board that were infected by oral sex period."

How can you say that?!?! You could only know that if you were some kind of a mind-reader or a deity or something. I seems that you're covering your eyes not wanting to see what these people have to say just because they were not part of a scientific study.

"But when it gets down to it and asking them questions you get the "Oh I forgot about that or I just did it one time or I stopped and put on a condom before proceeding." etc. etc. Do you actually know how long it takes to get the person to breakdown and tell you their real risks? We find that most would rather lie than admit to what they've actually done."

No, I don't know how long that takes. Do you? Have you questioned these people? Do you know them?

[Teak]

http://forums.poz.com/index.php?topic=2716.0 a couple of posts for this person in 2006 that has never been back to the forum. Why? Because they weren't infected in the first place.

http://forums.poz.com/index.php?topic=4800 Again this person posted only once in 2006 and has never been back. Because like most of you here they didn't have a risk to begin with.

[Teak]

We question them all the time. Like I told you go take your test, collect your negative result, then come back here and post your negative result on the forum. That is how much faith I have in science verses the word of some worry wort.

[SillyStupid]

Or the user "MoltenStorm" who in this thread (http://forums.poz.com/index.php?topic=837.0) says:

"Can HIV be transmitted through oral sex?
Yes. "Minimal" risk is still a risk. I got HIV through receptive fellatio (no ejaculation).
Oral Sex is a risk of transmission even though popular belief likes to dictate otherwise. While it may not be as risky as unprotected anal or vaginal sex, it is still a risk."

Although it's hard for me to think rationally because another wave of panic is about to seize me, I don't believe it's fair of you or other moderators on AidsMeds forum not to advise testing to anyone who has performed fellatio. There are clearly people who have been infected this way. Going strictly by your advice, I wouldn't test, but the more I read on AidsMeds, the more I'm seeing the truth of this being a very very real threat.

[Teak]

Yeah, yeah, yeah and they aren't about to tell you about their real risks either. We give out scientific advice not some peer review stories. There are no one on the board that were infected by oral sex period. It's the internet, you can say what you want but when it gets down to it and asking them questions you get the "Oh I forgot about that or I just did it one time or I stopped and put on a condom before proceeding." etc. etc. Do you actually know how long it takes to get the person to breakdown and tell you their real risks? We find that most would rather lie than admit to what they've actually done. I don't know if it's guilt or shame. You can never go by what someone says or asking someone if they are negitive before having sex. You aren't going to find honesty in the head of a penis or the opening of a vagina, both have lips but neither can utter a word.

[SillyStupid]

For example this person whose only risks were open kissing and oral sex: http://forums.poz.com/index.php?topic=2716.0. Or this person: http://forums.poz.com/index.php?topic=4800.0.

[SillyStupid]

Well I've read several postings on AidsMeds's "I just tested poz" forums and there are several - several!! - individuals who claim they could only have contracted HIV by oral sex, swearing there is no other way they could have gotten it. What I don't understand is how in the "Am I infected?" forums you and your collegaues keep giving out advice "I wouldn't even test about this" and similar to people who perfomed fellatio if there's a number of people on that same board infected by oral sex.

[Teak]

This is the internet. You can find all the conflicting information that you want if you want to take the time and look for it. I have to agree with reg. if it will make you feel better then test.

[OrionQuest]

You also have to understand the difference between a theoretical risk and an actual risk.  Theoretically I can get hit by a crashing airplane right here where I sit.  Does it happen often? No.  CAN it happen? Yes.  Should I worry about it? No.

[regularjoey]

Yes getting Teak's opinion, and then a second opinion from RapidRod is really encouraging )))
There is no conflicting data on this.
Pretty much everyone now agrees that the risk for oral is extremely low, but not zero.

[SillyStupid]

I checked out the AidsMeds forum and found a lot of encouragement. I really, really hope they are right (especially RapidRod, right, Teak? :)). I just don't understand how there can be so much conflicting advice and data. I've seen everything from oral sex = no risk to oral sex = high risk.