These people are wrong. In many cases you CAN feel if you have swollen lymph nodes (but not in all cases). Also, there are plenty of cases where a doctor can't feel a swollen lymph node on a patient even though it is very swollen. Nobody (including doctors) are more familiar with your body than you are. If you still have swollen lymph nodes, call around to find a place that might be able do a biopsy or run some tests on your affected lymph nodes. This might reveal the cause of why your lymph nodes are swollen.
Swollen lymph nodes indicate that your body is fighting an infection. It could be HIV but it could also be bacterial or viral such as herpes. You could even have an infected tooth that you are unaware of.
Another thing,, you have a bunch of lymph nodes,, even if you only have one swollen lymph node, that has been swollen for a couple months, you should find a doctor that cares enough to help you figure out what's wrong.
Another thing that people don't realize is that, it is usually an itch or a pain that made the person itch their lymph node in the first place. That's usually how people find a swollen lymph node in their body. (Doctors barely ever notice swollen lymph nodes before the patient!)