Positive?

[Damien10]

Back in early September I had an experience with a CSW. She gave me oral sex with a condom on. It went on for about 30 mins. During which I fingered her deeply. Her fluids and lube were all on my hands. Before I removed the condom, I went to wash my hands but I didn't use soap. My hands still smelled of her and I am sure that I still had some of her fluids on my hand as well as lube. I may have washed my hands with room temperature water for 10-15 secs if soo much. The water pressure was low. I then removed the condom and masturbated till I ejaculated on her. She didn't touch me after I removed the condom. I am asking this because after that incident, I have suffered every ars symptom in the book....rash, fever, body aches, cough, sore throat, weight loss and I also have a swollen prominent node under my left arm for over 3 weeks now (It popped up overnight and is painless). I also have one under the right side of my chin. First time in my life I have experienced these symptoms. The nightsweats started about a week after exposure, was mild and lasted a couple of days.  How possible can this be HIV. I didn't penetrate and I washed my hands. How unlucky can I be? Hiv isn't suppose to be transmitted outside the host. I would have put this up as coincidence if I didnt have the painless lymph node for over 3 weeks now. That's the scariest symptom of all of this. I really don't understand it. I thought no penetration meant that I was being safe.

[Kirstie_MHModerator]

You can tell who has NOT been through ARS - people who were not exposed to HIV cannot go through ARS.  You have been advised of the risks, and have listed them yourself.  There is no need to ask about other no-risk events.

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[Damien10]

Thanks for the response @curfew....my experience has been overwhelming. Im pretty sure I went through ars...I even have the unexplained weight loss and swollen axillary lymph node to show for it. The scary tging is that I am in a country with a high rate. I am hoping that my actions didn't prolong the virus on my hands. I read that once it leaves the body it can no longer reproduce/transmit. Does that mean it can't infect a new person? I was ill at the time n had possible inflamation. Im also circumsized. So many different variables at play. I wish I had just kept the condom on and finished. Ive never felt like this before.

[CurfewX]

HIV is not infectious outside the body.  You did NOT go through ARS.  You had no risk for HIV.  There is no "luck" involved - either you had a risk or you didn't, and in this case, you simply didn't.

[Damien10]

As long as HIV is not infectious outside the body then I should be ok. How can you tell who went through ars and who didn't without an hiv test anyway? Other sources say that once you are in contact with the bodily fluid and if that bodily fluid reaches your mucous membrane then there is a possibility. So many different sources.

[Damien10]

What if whilst fingering I got deep in her actually touching her cervix?

[Damien10]

Is it possible that  I got another virus such as CMV? This mimics HIV infection but how is that possible if my immune system isn't damaged?

[Damien10]

Isn't there a risk once you are in contact with a bodily fluid during sexual activity. If bodily fluid touches foreskin or penis head/urethra then that should be a risk. The virus can live for sometime outside the body but can't infect a new host? It can also live on damp surface such as a wet hand? Why can't anyone give a definite answer regarding transmission. Some say no risk, others say risk

[Damien10]

These are the confirmed ways that HIV can be transmitted?

Unprotected anal or vaginal sexual intercourse (Penis in the vagina)

Mother to child (during childbirth or breast feeding)

Needles (Injecting Drugs etc)

Oral sex (Negligible)

[RubyWitch]

Protected oral sex is not a risk for HIV.
Fingering is not a risk for HIV.
You NEVER HAD a risk for HIV.

See your doctor about your symptoms because they have absolutely nothing to do with HIV.

Getting educated about HIV will help you tremendously with your anxiety.

[Damien10]

It's not anxiety. Wouldn't the exposure to the fluids touching my penis, possibly my urethra be a risk. I was seriously ill for the last couple of weeks and now I also have swollen nodes that show that my body is fighting a systemic infection. I need to wait to test at the 3 month mark for a definite answer. Why are we so dismissive. Science says that hiv cannot be transmitted outside the body but I have been ill after this exposure. That is not coincidence. Anxiety could possibly explain every other symptom but not the swollen nodes that would come from an internal infection. It's almost 4 weeks now that it is swollen and painless.

[Damien10]

What if she had a high volume load as she was unaware of her status or wasn't on treatment?

[CurfewX]

No "what ifs" that you add will make this a risk.  You correctly listed the risks below, though even the extraordinarily negligible, theoretical risk from oral sex would be for the person giving, not receiving. You did not have a risk and do not need to test.

Regarding CMV, I don't know.  This is an HIV Prevention forum, and we're not familiar with CMV.

[Damien10]

Anyone? Any suggestions?