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So confused & trying not to freak out
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If you believe you have been exposed to HIV and want help to judge your risk, would like advice about HIV testing, or have questions about the effectiveness of condoms or risks associated with specific sexual practices, this is the site for you.

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So confused & trying not to freak out

I'm a 26 yr old straight female... awaiting results of an HIV test and very worried. I don't need a lecture about how stupid I was... here and now I'm pretty much beside myself every second of the day with disappointment in myself. I was a stupid, careless girl. Since then, I'm 100% different and I'm a Christian and have asked for some serious forgiveness from God.

I had a time period of 2 years 05-07 where I was pretty promiscuous... mostly one time encounters, I'd say 1/2 were protected. Some were multiple encounters with one man that was protected about 1/2 the time. All heterosexuals, I'm assuming non IDU's and never once did any of them ejaculate inside me. I also did give oral with ejaculation.

I met my fiance in very late 07 and very shortly after was diagnosed with Chlamydia. I did have symptoms of it and was hospitalized for 3 days. I was treated and clear of it after antibiotics. They did test me in the hospital for Gonorrhea, etc and I assume was negative because they never said anymore regarding any other disease. My fiance did get tested for everything and was totally negative.

I've been on birth control since very shortly after that hospital stay and have had unprotected sex with him for closely 3 years now.  I've had yeast infections since starting the birth control... some really severe and some just feel like a constant itch. But, my menstrual cycle has always been very regular, even before birth control. I've had flu like symptoms but I couldn't tell you when, they are seasonal like everyone else. I do get hives and chest rashes that disappear in minutes. So, from what I've read I don't believe I've had any ARS symptoms?

About 6 months ago I was in the hospital over night for lower back ache, frequent urination... I never had a discharge or a burning sensation. All I ever got out of the doctors was that they wanted to explore and see if maybe I had a twisted cyst, that's all they could find and my cultures all came back normal. They just gave me something for the pain and that was it. At the end of that hospital stay, I was asked by a man if I wanted to test for HIV and I said no because I had been tested before. But, honestly, thinking back... the doctors never said anything about HIV and I didn't know I had to ask to be tested. Having being with my fiance for close to 3 years now, I'm beyond terrified that I have something and I've given it to him.  I just want some home because I'm SO scared.

On top of all that, yes, I've made the mistake of reading too much on the internet. I, like so many others, don't know whats real and whats not. Are heterosexual infections really as big of a deal as some people make it out to be or do I listen to others that there's really no risk in heterosexual encounters? Some doctors on here tell most people don't worry, even with many partners, it's a low risk and others tell you other wise.

Also, I want to ask if the yeast infections more than likely HIV or my birth control. I've cut WAY down on any sugar entering my body and I'd like to also ask how long it will take for me to see results if a high sugar diet was to blame? I'm also being very mindful of detergents, soaps, etc.  If I don't have HIV I just don't understand how to detox and start fresh basically.

I want peace of mind, which I know I will get no matter what my results are but the wait is killing me.

Thank you to anyone and everyone.



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