Unprotected Sex HIV Risk

Dear Doctors

My friend recently told me about this site and I was hoping I could get some help.

On Sept. 5th I had unprotected vaginal intercourse and unprotected oral sex with a friend of mine....I am female he is male.  He just recently got out of a long time committed relationship.  He took a Home Access HIV-1 test on 8/25/11 which was negative.  My concern with that is that it wasn't accurate since he and his ex just broke up.  He states he hasn't had sex with anyone else other then his ex since 2009 and I know in 2010 he was negative for HIV....but I am very concerned the test wasn't accurate.

This morning Sept 10th I am having a stiff neck and a "lie bump" on my tongue....sorry I don't know the medical term for "lie bump".   I am completely going insane thinking this is ARS.  I will simply die if I have HIV.  

Believe you me I do know what a stupid decision I made by having unprotected sex.  He didn't cum inside me but I know when it comes to HIV this doesn't really make a difference.

My questions are how likely am I to get HIV from this single exposure?  Do you believe his Home Access Test is accurate?  Can anxiety cause you to have ARS symptoms?  I am freaking out!!!  I don't know if I can make it 90 days before I can test.  This is all I can think about...how I have now gotten HIV from this stupid mistake and how my life is now over.  I can not stop these thoughts from running through my head.

PLEASE PLEASE HELP ME!!!

I feel like I have it...and I know the mind can be a very powerful thing.  Any advice would be helpful.  PLEASE HELP!!!

Thanks
Brookelyn

[Edward W Hook, MD]

Welcome to the Forum.  Your risk for HIV from this exposure is miniscule.   I'll provide the basis for my comments.  Your partner was low risk. Few heterosexual men have HIV and when you factor in that he was  previously in a monogamous relationship and had a recent negative HIV test (the Home Access test is very reliable) there is little chance that he has HIV.  Further, even if he did, the risk of getting HIV from a single episode of genital sex is less than 1 in 1000.  Overall, given the facts you have provided, your statistical risk for HIV is less than 1 in a million.

There are many causes of stiff neck, anxiety being among them. The symptoms you describe are not suggestive of the ARS.  

Finally, you o not need wait 90 days for testing. Current tests provide conclusive results 8 weeks (<60 days) after  exposure.   There is excellent, confidential testing available at your local (Birmingham) STD Clinic. EWH

p.s. I do not know what  “lie bump” is. EWH

[bigmistake192]

Thank you for your quick answer.  

A lie bump as we call them here in the south is like an inflammed taste bud.  I am concerned this is turning into a mouth ulcer which I heard is a main ARS symptom.  Could this mouth ulcer mean I have in fact been infected with HIV?  Stiff neck with a possible mouth ulcer has me completely freaking out.

Thank you so much for your help.

[bigmistake192]

please dear dr hook,

answer my question on rather mouth ulcer with stiff neck is a strong indicator of ars?  does this sound like ars to u?

please help i am losing my mind!!!!!!!!

thank you

brookelyn

[Edward W Hook, MD]

Np neither an inflammed taste bud nor the combination of a mouth ulcer with a stiff neck suggests HIV.  I said this before. EWH

[bigmistake192]

Sorry if I offended u doctor. Just extremely stressed out. Thank you for answer. I will bother u no more. Thanks again.

Brookelyn

[Edward W Hook, MD]

You did not offend me.  My answers are given in the hope of helping you to put your stress in perspective.  I hope they have. EWH

[bigmistake192]

Dear Dr. Hook,

I am so sorry to bother you again after I said I wouldn't.  But yesterday morning I noticed a weird red area on my tongue with some, what appears to be large taste buds....some look whitish.  I am thinking this is thrush.  I have read its a very strong indicator of HIV.  I now can't sleep or eat.  I am completely losing my mind.

I asked my friend when was the last time he and his ex had sex and he said Aug 25th.  So his HIV may not be conclusive.  

Scared out of mind right now.  How will I tell everyone I am HIV positive.  Please advise.

Do you know of any HIV doctors in Birmingham, AL.....I am gonna need one.

[bigmistake192]

Again my friend did reassure me that he hasn't had sex with anyone other then his ex but I am just thinking what if she cheated and is newly infected.....then his test wouldn't be accurate.  

Oh what if he is lying.  Which he swears he isn't and said he would be willing to take a test anytime if it makes me feel better....but asked that I please stop beating him over the head with this HIV matter.

[Edward W Hook, MD]

Your anxiety and paranoia appears to have taken over and it is not clear that you are reading (or hearing) what has been written before.

Enlarged taste buds are not suggestive of thrush and most people with thrush do not have HIV.  While thrush rates are increased in persons with HIV, thrush is a common problem and as I've said, most people who have thrush do not have HIV.

As far as health care providers are concerned, as I said before, you don't know you have HIV and I would be very surprised if you do. the most direct way for you to find out, and one of the best places to do so in at the Jefferson County Department of Health STD Clinic in Birmingham.

I won't have more to say.  Take care.EWH