Wanting some information

The past is coming to haunt me. When i was in college i was raped. It was at a party and i was a virgin it was breif he entered me for all of 10 to 15 seconds. I pushed him off and out of shame, and embarrasment although it wasnt my fault never went to the dr i was afraid of what my family and friends would think of me. I come from a very strict religious home. STUPID i know. I am a white fermale who has never used drugs. After my rape experience i was adamit about safe sex.  I dated a white heterosexual male who is in the navy. He is a non drug user. He had been recently divorced with one child. I have always practiced safe sex. during our relationship we always used condoms except on a trip we had sex (only vaginal intercourse) about 4 times without them he never ejaculated inside me. I know symptoms arent a good way to diagnose anything but The next day after having unprotected sex with him i felt like crap. Doesnt the navy regularly screen for STDS? I think it was more due to lack of sleep etc. Is it possible to have symptoms of an STD the next day less than 24 hours? I have read your other posts about the odds and realize they are not high but of course theres always the chance. Now its two years later and i am in a serious relationship and were getting married in the summer. Were both going to get tested. My fiance has had many more partners than me, but i am a little terrified to be tested for fear the rape or my ex boyfriend had something. I would appreciate any advice. If one of us does have an STD could we still have children in our marriage?

Thanks ahead of time for answering my questions. I hope my stupidity of my early 20's doesnt come back to haunt me.

[H. Hunter Handsfield, M.D.]

Welcome to the STD forum.  Please accept my sympathy for your difficult past sexual experience. You probably know it is quite common for people in your situation to not take action or seek counseling, for exactly the reasons you state.  You definitely should not be feeling guilty either about the assault itself or your own reactions afterward.  But if these issues are still playing on your mind, it is never too late to seek counseling.

As for your next (Navy) partnership, I cannot judge the level of STD risk.  There are no requirements for STD testing by the Navy or any other service -- although many service men and women indeed are tested frequently.  I really can't interpret "felt like crap" as a symptom, but most STDs in women don't show up for at least 2-3 days after exposure; and the dominant symptoms are in the genital area -- discharge, bleeding, genital sores, low abndominal pain, etc.

Could you have been affected by an undiagnosed STD all these years?  Yes, but it is statistically unlikely.  And few STDs cause infertility or other pregnancy-related health problems, especially if there were no STD symptoms soon after the exposure.  All things considered, it is unlikely your past sexual events (I don't agree it was "stupidity") are going to "come back to haunt" you.

Still, for peace of mind it certainly would make sense for you to have standard STD tests.  Be entirely candid with your gynecologist (or whatever provider you see) about your concerns and the reasons for them.  Trust me on this:  your story is nothing compared with others s/he has heard; s/he won't bat an eye, will understand your concern, and will advise you properly.  The standard approach would be to test you for chlamydia, gonorrhea, syphilis, and HIV; plus a pap smear (which presumably you have been doing anyway over the years).

Finally, if you have not done so, you probably should discuss all this with your partner.  If he is gracious and cares for you, he'll not only understand but will probably agree to get tested for STDs himself.

For the large majority of people in your situation, all turns out well.  Best wishes for a long, healthy, and rewarding relationship and a happy family in the future.

Regards--  HHH, MD

[H. Hunter Handsfield, M.D.]

I meant to say that although general STD testing isn't done automatically in the US military, all service personnel have HIV testing at least when the join up and, I believe, periodically (yearly?) thereafter.  The chance your Navy partner had HIV is near zero.  Same for the guy who assaulted you, especially if he wasn't bisexual or an injection drug user.

[JA198655]

Thank you for the information Dr Handsfield. It really eased my nerves. The guy who assaulted me was neither of those things. I am going to speak to a counselar about the sexual assault. It has been lingering on & off in my mind for while & I am going to make an apt. to see my obgyn. I have been going regularly to those apts. Based on the information on the forum you have already posted. White heterosexual men that are non injection drug users in the US are at a much lower risk for hiv?

Thank you again  

[H. Hunter Handsfield, M.D.]

"White heterosexual men that are non injection drug users in the US are at a much lower risk for hiv?"  If such men also have not been incarcerated and are not immigrants from HIV endemic areas, fewer than 1 in 1,000 has HIV, maybe only 1 in 10,000.  And it would have been even lower several years ago.

[JA198655]

Thank you & happy holidays.