accepted my fate.

Ive pretty much accepted the fact that I have acquired HIV.  Ive done enough research on this website and others to understand what is happening to my body.  Ive read the posts about lymph nodes, and the ones about the ARS rash.  I havent found a single thread with both of them at the same exact time like mine were.  My DOCTOR CONFIRMED lymph nodes still hang out on the right side of my neck, and I know its not true that if u have HIV they HAVE to be body wide, as sunnygirl has showed us that they only were in her neck.  And this nonsense people are spreading on this forum that oral is just a "theoretical" risk and that you dont need to get tested afterwards is ridiculous.  Im going to walk into the clinic with my head held high and get the help that I need to deal with this virus.  It breaks my heart that Ive decided my own fate at 21 years old.  all I ever wanted was to get married and have babies. Ive never even been promiscuous. This guy was only the second sexual experience Ive ever had. The hardest part will be telling my family. I have no idea how Im going to deal with that yet. but I guess it will come when it comes.

[rollinray]

Have you gotten tested yet?

[backstabbed05]

I tested negative at five weeks, but that doenst mean ****.

[rollinray]

well then get tested at 12 weeks and then make your decisions

[Teak]

Make sure you come back and post your negative result.

[rollinray]

what did your rash look like and how long did it last

[peekawho]

Stop being dramatic.  The symptoms of ARS are the identical symptoms of about a hundred other garden variety illnesses, all of them much, much,  more common than HIV.

If oral was your only exposure, you have nothing to worry about. And I disagree that your 5 week test is meaningless.  Not conclusive, but probably around 90% accurate.  And considering you didn't have a meaningful risk, it probably won't change.  

[backstabbed05]

my rash was hives and it lasted about 3 or 4 days.

[backstabbed05]

I got tested at eight weeks as well. i dont get my results till next Thursday because of some vacation bull****. How ironic though it is.  Someone who was a virigin until 20 years old, who wouldnt even sleep in a monogamous relationship unprotected because of fear of HIV, meets just a normal guy after a hard break up and messes around.. I honestly can't believe this is happening.

[peekawho]

That's because it isn't.  

[backstabbed05]

oh it is, trust me.  Ive never had symptoms like these in my entire life. never.

[mike_no]

Shut up !

Get tested and post your negative here, you did not acquire the virus if you have not lied about your incidence here, if oral was only your risk, you are 100% HIV negative, do talk to me when you get your 13 week's negative.

[backstabbed05]

actually, I DID post a question to him.  Him telling me that "oh a million things can cause hives and lymph nodes" doesnt really make me feel a whole lot better, sorry.

[backstabbed05]

and to be honest, its not even the lymph nodes that scared me so bad. I was totally over them until I woke up with hives that looked like I had oatmeal on my face.  and how did they look?? exactly like he describes the ARS rash, bumpy, sudden and with no apparent cause.

[shoesize12]

also, i remember reading post from the doctor where he says that if you had a test at 5-6 weeks and it was negative then none of your symptoms can be due to HIV as your 5 week negative PROOVES that. I think that you are probably just being extra hard on yourself.

[backstabbed05]

pecha, dont post here. I know its you.  leave ME to worry about my actual exposure and go get some help for your MENTAL issues.

[shoesize12]

pecha i am not, but im just trying to help you out.

[oneanxiousfellow]

You're obviously very worked up about this.  Take a look at this list of symptoms:  http://www.anxietycentre.com/anxiety-symptoms.shtml

You've tested and it's apparently 90% accurate + you were low/no risk anyway.  Take the advice of the people here and try to calm down.  I know it's easier said than done but you have to slow down and breathe. :)

[sun2moon4starr]

Hey Hon,

I am going thru the EXACT same thing. Accept, my issues/symptoms are more complex. Diarreah (diarrhea) yes 4 + months/re-occurant throat ulcers in mouth and throat 2 1/2 months-they will not stop even with prescribed Valtrex/mysterious rash/SEVERE MUSCLE PAIN and I mean SEVERE-everywhere-arms, legs, feet, everywhere! Coughing-dry-constant sore throat. Everyday I wake up with something new. Slight gum decay, fatigue, dizzyness, red spots under skin/breast and just the feeling I have it. Similar situation, fellatio man-unknown serostatus, no ejac but def pre-***. Spit out precum ulcer in mouth at the time....tested at 2 1/2 weeks NEG for everything....went in 3 months later dr told me not to test again. An er dr told me that my issues were not hiv related.....this site is telling me the same. I have an appointment tomarrow w/a different dr to find out all I can....si if everyone says NO, why does my heart say I am and why do these things keep happening....even when I am happy and I do forget about eh whole issue....something new pops up...so sweetie, I know how u feel!

[peekawho]

I'll try one more time.  Although I'm wasting my breath.  You want to believe you have HIV for some reason.

There are many, many garden variety illnesses that have the identical symptoms, and they are very common.  Sometimes a person never knows what caused something.  If you caught a garden variety bug that you never had before, then you would be having these "symptoms" for the first time, now wouldn't you?

If you showed your grossly enlarged lymph node to your doctor as you indicated, did he/she SAY you almost certainly had HIV?

Post a question to Dr. HHH if you don't believe us.  Or do you think he doesn't understand what HIV is all about?  

[rockchick2k2]

I am a 19 year old female and i have just recently tested positive for chlyimedia. i know this isn't a particularly bad STD (but im by no means being blas

[Teak]

It would be nice if you started your own thread. You had a risk and need to test 13 weeks past your last unprotected sex to get a conclusive result.