have all symptoms please help!!

I really need some help here. Me and my husband of twelve years have been having marital problems and so for about two weeks in dec we had not had any sex. On dec 13 we finally did. no condom was used but he did not ejaculate inside me.  about the twentieth I started having burning during urination and fever, sore throat and and ulcer in my genital area, I tested pos for herpes and for about two weeks after that I had a sore on my thoat, fever, a weird tongue, no taste in my mouth, weight loss, and joint pain.  once that started to go away I started with a slight cough and a subtle pain on the right side of my back.  I am so scared that I got HIV at the same time with the herpes. I didn't notice any open sores on him but could he have shed the herpes and the HIV ?? please help I'm so scared I don't know what to do

[bozzle]

Do you know if he, or did you, have unprotected sex with anyone else inbetween your marriage problems? If not, then your husband must have given you herpes. Have you asked me about this?!?

[judetha]

I know he must have given it to me because I have never cheated. But I'm worried that these symptoms might not only be from herpes but also early stage of hiv. I can deal with herpes but I'm so scared that my cough and sore throat and everything else is coming from hiv

[Teak]

March 13th or about go get an HIV test. That will give you a conclusive result.

[judetha]

is that the earliest I can get tested? I am going crazy with fear. I cant' eat or evern sleep

[troggs]

Your other options are to have your husband test for hiv / std's. This is by no means 100%, but it can help put perspective on things. Did you practice safe sex during your marriage before the unprotected event occurred? I ask because you mentioned it in a way that seemed like it was not the norm...If , big IF here, if your husband was recently infected he would also be in the window period so this may not do anything for you, but this would be a good time to have him explain himself to you..On average most infected will test hiv + in the first 22-25 days after exposure..if it were me, i would test @ 30 days / 8 weeks and 12 weeks. It's not cheap to do this if you don't have insurance but your worth it Judetha. You could also do 30 days and then 12 weeks, that up to you, your finances waiting the whole three months without testing in between can be unnerving, so this is a possible test strategy..i wish you well and a negative test result.  

[alienshadow]

test at 3 months post exposure and until then tell him to wrap it up