hiv ymptoms

[worriedsick227]

Hello there im here really stressed out because im pretty sure i have hiv but im scared of being tested and i just need to take this out of me is really killing me i dont know what to do. On feb 1 of this year i went to a prostitute i used protection but before starting to have sex i asked her hiv and std status and she said she was clean. so two weeks later i came down with a flu and some night sweats but just my legs i ignored it because i had night sweats before and the flu i also ignored it because my whole family had it. So a little after i noticed some bumps behind my knee like 11 of them on a red base i also did not pay atention to it. So three weeks later i visited the same prostitute which she is not a street walker its an apartment and we had sex again with protection, so when she was in the doggy position i noticed some two red bumps on her anus but before she bend over she rode me for like five minutes.when i seen the red bumps on her i freaked out and immediately wiped my groin area with a wipe. And removed the condom with my hands im sure i had some fissures on my hand. So thats when i freaked out for the next three months. After this incident i had a really bad burning sensation on my my pelvic area thats when i knew the the bumps behind my knee were herpes. Some fissures later appeared in my groin but not right after the burning sensation. Everything came in place i knew she infected me with herpes. I was really depressed but then just said to myself i hope this is a lesson learned. But the odd thing is that i never had any bumps on my penis i assume since it was protected. I had a second outbreak a month later one on my front left knee and another bump behind my right left knee and healed in a week. But the odd thing how couldve i possibly cantracted hiv since my penis was protected i never had a single bump on my penis, im not oficially diagnosed yet but a month and a half later i noticed i lost 20 pounds i dont know if it was for not eating because of the herpes stress.I also have one swollen lymph node behind my neck and another next to my throat and one on each side of my groin none on armpits. One question if i have swollen groin lymph nodes would it be just one bean size lump on each side or would i have more than one? So when i noticed a drop in my weight i knew i probbably contracted hiv. And after the weight drop i noticed like pimples appearing on my chest but since i suffer from acne i dont know if its ars related. But what concerned me the most is when i got a little brown dry skin blotch on my shoulder and thats when i knew i was most likely infected with hiv. So another month went by and a purple bruise like blotch with a white center appeared on my right forearm so i really freaked out i thought right away of karoni sacorma since i smoke i developed skin cancer already.I had a few night sweats after but only on my legs. My weight has been stable at were it dropped to from 189 to 170 and im 5'9. I also feel some tingling sensations on my arms and legs muscle spasms but all this is happening three months later i still get little pimple like on my shoulders and a few pitachae spots. I also had bowel movement change no diarrhea but im contstipated gut gurgles alot and some kind of inflamation on my intestines. Im really scared im pretty sure i have hiv and im afraid to go get tested. Im just scared of the results what gives me a bit of hope is that i never had any lesions on my penis from herpes assuming it must of been protected but what concerns me is that when someone contracts herpes away from genital area is due to herpes disemmination which is caused by compromised immune system. after the first outbreak behind my knee i only had one outbreak a month apart but consited only of two bumps one on left front knee and the other behind left knee. But never had a single bump on penis just shotting pains and mild discharge. At first i thought i only had herpes but when my weight dropped and that purple bruise appeared on my forearm i knew i had contracted hiv but some say there is little chance after using a condom. Can someone just please help me im so scared i canf no longer function i dont feel week but im so scared. If there were little wholes on the condom would it have ruptured? because when i ejaculated i seen all semen in the condom. If i caught hiv it was from the first exposure i had with this csw wich the condom was intact. Im just trying to man up to go get tested trying to ready for the results its been three months already if i have hiv how long can i wait if i dont start treatment soon? because im just trying to cope with hiv and when i hear results i just wont freak out im trying to come into terms with it i also been smoking alot lately since all this ordeal started because my anxiety level is just insanely high that im not stable i take like 2 mile long walks to ease it a little bit. I called the csw and asked her if she has hiv and herpes and she says no and she told me to meet up at a clinic but later she refused. if i have hiv can i still have children? althoug through inseminasation ofcourse? any answers would be appreciated thank you very much for reading my long post i just need to get it out of me please some advise would be really appreciated thank you very much.

[worriedsick227]

thank you for replying back you guys really help sorry for me being so stuborn but when something like this start happening we assume the worst.

[worriedsick227]

thank you very much

[nursegirl6572]

You were already told you never had a risk.  We can't answer every anxiety driven question you come up with.  I would strongly recommend you seek professional help for your anxiety.

You had no risk for HIV.

[worriedsick227]

also what concerns me is the lymph node behind my neck is a little non mobile bump under the skin its not a pimple thank you for your time and patience.

[worriedsick227]

Im so sorry for posting up again but today i noticed a brown  flat patch scab look alike skin its not a scratch or anything it just appeared , on my shoulder could that be related to hiv ?? and yesterday i had a red blanching pimple which today has a white head any opinion would be appreciated.

[RainLover71]

You're welcome and please relax now.

[worriedsick227]

thank you for your time really appreciate it

[RainLover71]

She wouldn't do anything to the condom and if she did it would have broke and been obvious.Don't let fear make your imagination run wild.You don't need HIV testing,please accept the facts.

[worriedsick227]

one more last question but before thank you for replying back, i promise not to ask anymore ?'s until i have enough guts to go and get tested, but if the csw puntured the condom since she provided it and was trojan would the condom had burst for me to notice, or would the condom remain intact with puntures on it thank you for ur patience.

[RainLover71]

You never had a risk and it's not good to think you have HIV from zero risk exposures.If you can't accept this then you require therapy.

[worriedsick227]

i forgot to mention the second time i visited the csw she had a bruice like blotch on her left cheek i noticed it after noticing the herpes on her anus just to be more specific of my symptoms from first exposure on feb 1 were:
flu with cough, night sweats only legs and pelvic region, the herpes behind my right knee, fever, i dont remember touching nor even paid attention to lymph nodes at the time but pretty sure they must of been swollen, back pain on legs and a rash blotch on my ribcage area. I ignored symptoms but on feb25 was the second exposure when i noticed a blotch on her face after noticing the herpes lesions on her. from feb 25 i knew i had herpes at first i forgot to mention also in mid march my nose started burning really bad and developed a blister on my left nostril and one little bump on the side of the nose but only on the outside, until right now the blister on my nostril and the little bump on the side of my nose it hasnt scabbed os heal. In april i started to develop little blanching moskito size pimples on my chest. And in april is when i also noticed the brown dried skin blotch on my shoulder which looked like a scab which i scraped off and there was a puss filled pimple like under the dry skin , Also two weeks ago my my groin lymph nodes swelled only noticed a bean shaped bump on each side and the right one bothered me i had to wear my pants up.. my right lymph node under my chin swells and causes me to choke sometimes and my left lymph node under my chin swells and goes down , as of right now my right lymph node is swollen and my left is a little swollen i also have a small bump under the skin behind my neck and skin above it was red , right now i can feel two bean shape size bumps on each side of my groin, I also have two big red pimple like bumps on my chest i tried popping them but they wont pop one blanches the other doesnt. Also what really concerns me is the purple bruise like blotch with a center color of my skin its dissapearing, its fading away but that never happened before i never had bruices like that, i was wearing long sleeve shirts because i didnt want my coworkers to see it and ive been acting noticeble unsteady that one coworker asked me whats wrong with me and just dont want them to suspect i might have hiv. If its kaposis sacorma can it develop in early hiv infection?
Right now i feel prickling needles on arms and legs and all my muscles are tweatching alot the shake throughout my body. Ive been able to eat a bit more but only put on five pounds then drop back to 170, my nose burns and tingles on and off for the past week but dont break out with herpes and still have one herpe lesion outside my nose and a blister inside my nostril that havent scabbed nor heal in  a month and a half, righht now my neck is also red but i dont see bumps, i havent had a single herpes lesion on my penis nor pelvic region and havent had a herpes outbreak on my knees but i think i have diseminated herpes because of the ones i have on my nose that havent healed and the ones i broke out with on my knees during first exposure. I also have purple spider veins on my ancles. Lets say i have hiv but i dont want to face reality of the thruth yet like in another three months because i have no money for an std screening right now would my immune system be compromised for not starting medication early? i also been smoking alot lately, I also notice white coating on my tongue last week but im able to brush it off can it be thrush? about my weight i only noticed ive been loosing it on my legs because my pants seem to be baggier and my trunk remains in the same shape my buttocks seem smaller, also ive been checking my arm strenght lately to see if im weaker but it looks like i still have the same strenght in them which gives a little hope. I know this is an advice forum but what concerns me the most is the lymph nodes and the purple bruise like blotch that appeared on my forearm with a white center for no reason any suggestions what can it be??  Im so broken right now i dont feel suicidal but i can feel the pressure already of being positive, can early hiv symptoms happen so sporadic months apart, i feel so so broken i know i messed up please excuse me but i need to drain myself since i cant talk to any one about my situation since i want to cry but i just cant i only get watery eyes i see girls now and i know and i just dont see them the same as before i dont feel atracted to them anymore, my urge for meeting strangers got me in this mess, I had a dream of having a wife and children and now i see it slippin through my fingers like water, I cant escape this reality even when im sleeping i have nightmares of cemeterys and me looking at myself in my dreams as hiv +. Today my dad called me to go to an auction with him which i didnt really want to go because of my anxiety and depresion but i still went with him and i usually dont hug my dad but today i wanted to hug him and tell him how much i love him and my mom also i just want to breakdown but i cant.When we all go through bad situations like this one we see what life is really like because alot of good things that didnt happen before start happening i just ask god for forgivness to give me another chance at life
. im sorry for the long thread but i need to take this out of my chrst please dont ban me, I never thought this couldve happen to me but then i think twice and say to myself why this couldnt happen to you alot of bad stuff happened to you why couldnt this happen to you, you shouldve learned from your past that anything can happen. My emotions are out, please bear with me. One more last question i forgot to ask lets say the csw punctured the condom with a needle would the condom had burst enough for me to notice? because her actions were kind of weird she tried kissing me and i told her not to kiss me and she insisted on getting on top of me to infect me because im pretty sure she was aware of her herpes outbreak during our second encounter. So if she did puncture the condom would it had burst during intercourse ? i know i need to get tested and im pretty sure ill be + but just one last advise would be helpful, and if im positive can i still have hiv - children with no risk?sorry for the long post but i need to get this out of me thank you for ur time and patience.

[RainLover71]

You don't have HIV because you never had a risk.You used protection both times.If you want to test for more common STD's you can but not HIV.Your symptoms really sound like extreme stress and anxiety over this and the fact you seem to think that you have already contracted HIV is a sign that you are very stressed.The fact of the matter is that you are safe and no testing is required.The chance that she would have HIV anyway are around 1%.

[worriedsick227]

please help im on edge need some advice