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im scared i may have hiv
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im scared i may have hiv

okay so here it goes.
i am an 18 year old female. about a year and half ago i had unprotected sex with a guy on my holiday in mexico. and i knew him so i thought i knew he didnt have anything. and i was on the pill so i wasnt worried about anything.i was very drunk and can not remember much of it but i do know we were in the room for about an hour and he was having some difficulties and he got hard but then went limp, he didnt *** and as far as i know he didnt have any pre-*** either but i cant be sure. but we had vaginal,oral and anal sex. and i didnt think anything of it then but now a year and a half later i live in scotland and have a boyfriend that i got pretty much after the holiday and have been with him ever since and we have had unprotected sex many times. and a week ago i got a phone call fromt he guy i was with in mexico and since my spanish is a little bit rusty and i dont know any medical terms in spanish, i couldnt understand what he said he had. but he said he had something and that he may have had it while we were together aswell so he was letting me know. but now i am soooooo worried.....
what are the chances if he is HIV positive and that even though he didnt *** in me could i still have got it? what are the chances his pre-*** gave me HIV? what about in the anal position?would pre-*** have given me HIV while we were doing it in the anal position?
i have some of the symptoms such as a swollen lymph node behind my left ear and fatigue and depression but i got that even before i started having sex.so i dont know. and i used to live in california and never really got sick.but now i live in scotland i seem to get the flu quite a lot..but i think the reason i have the flu a lot more here then in california is because scotland is very cold and im not used to it.please tell me what you think.... PLEASE!
i am getting a HIV test taken soon, but i am so scared because im having serious anxiety about this and i cant stop thinking about it. and im not only worried about myself, but my boyfriend. i dont want to tell him until i have an answer for sure. but im sooo scared. so if someone could please help me out and answer my questions to put my mind at a little bit of ease until i go for my appointment.
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Avatar_m_tn
Not only should you test for HIV, but other STDs as well. You could have prevented this with the use of a condom.
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186166_tn?1385262982
you cannot diagnose hiv from symptoms alone.   you had unprotected sex with the guy in mexico and your b/f in scotland.   ANY unprotected vaginal or anal sex puts you at risk.    please get tested so that you know the answer.  
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Avatar_n_tn
thank you guyz. i know that, i am getting tested for other STD's aswell but im most worried about HIV as there is no cure. but i would like to know the propbability of getting HIV from pre-*** while doing anal. please answer!
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Avatar_m_tn
There are some STDs that don't have a cure also. Yes, you can contract HIV from pre-ejaculation.
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Avatar_n_tn
when i do go for my HIV test, i know its a blood test. when will i have the results?
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219662_tn?1223862160
If you take a rapid test, you can get the results in under an hour.  

As far as your risk assessment - it was pretty high.  But since it was just a one-off, the chances are that you will be OK.  Best of luck.
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Avatar_n_tn
so it is a high chance i got HIV from pre-*** while doing anal?

gutted man. im freaked out my mind.
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Avatar_n_tn
everything i've read about it says chances of contracting HIV from pre-*** is minimal because there isnt a high volume of the virus in pre-***. is that true?
but doing anal makes that risk higher doesnt it?
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219662_tn?1223862160
Anal sex with a HIV-positive man is as high a risk as there is.  No ejaculation makes the risk lower, but it is still up there.  Don't get freaked out, the chances are that you will test negative.  A 1% chance that you will test positive - those odds are not low, but they are still in your favor.
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219662_tn?1223862160
There is no research on pre-***, to my knowledge.  Theoretically, of course you are exposed to less virus without exposure to semen.
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Avatar_m_tn
Do some research. There has been plenty of  research on pre-ejaculation and it's not theoretical.
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Avatar_n_tn
thank you guyz for you responses. now i just cant wait to get the tet over and done with and pray for the best. thanks.
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219662_tn?1223862160
I'm pretty sure that there has never been a study comparing the risk of a sexual act with ejaculation and a sexual act without ejaculation.  Not only have I not seen such a study, it would also be unethical to conduct such a study and most importantly, almost impossible to get valid results from such a study.  You can BS other people here with your phony "anonymous expert" act, but not me.
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Avatar_n_tn
Try not to worry yourself I know its easier said then done. I have been dealing with my own situation for almost six weeks and have alot at risk if it turns out bad but how I get by is putting it out my head and hoping for the best. At times It gets hard to deal with so I look for comfort here. My anxiety can get so bad sometimes that it inmoblelize me and keep me at this computer for hours.  I'm crying alot and don't even want to leave my house.  My point is some days are good and some days are bad but time heals all wounds even for those who are hiv they learn to live with it and enjoy life.  Get tested and learn from your mistake don't repeat it.

Also my exposure also included alchol (tampered with) and this taught me to be more alert and drink responsiblely as of now on I will take this teaching to my grave.  Hopefully not positve and no time soon.  I wish you the best.  Goodluck!
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Avatar_m_tn
There you go again talking out your A$$.
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219662_tn?1223862160
Like guiltnworry told you, quit picking fights with everyone in other people's threads, it's rude to the posters.  You want to continue your impostor "HIV educator" act, fine with me.  Look, I know you're bored as hell, if you want to tell me something use the IM.  I'm not replying to you here anymore.
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Avatar_n_tn
do you guys think i have HIV? based on what i told you?
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Avatar_m_tn
I have great respect in my heart for you two gentlemen. We are all here to help people, freaked and worried. Since nobody is perfect in this world, anybody, even an expert of infectious diseases does not have 100% perfect knowledge about HIV/AIDS and that's why research goes on and on.

Difference of opinion is very good as it keeps you on learning curve as you learn something new from others or do your own research to seek the facts. What I have read so far about precum is, yes, it does offer a risk, but quantum of the risk is far less than full blown "gush" due to its relatively low viral load and quantity.

Never the less, this fluid is not out of the list of risky body fluids.
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Avatar_m_tn
Impostor, the only one on hear that is even close to being an impostor it you with your PHD. LOL
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219662_tn?1223862160
I already told you that I don't.  I do DEFINITELY think that you should get tested.  Thoughts and feeling are irrelevant when it comes to HIV - testing is.
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219662_tn?1223862160
You're right, having a degree makes me an impostor.  
Being an HIV-positive junkie that misinforms people makes you an educator.
Use the IM if you want to address me.
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Avatar_m_tn
Considering the fact that you had couple of unprotected episodes at your credit, your risk can not be ruled out completely, unless you complete the 13 week testing cycle and get a negative report.

Although your risk may not be very high, but not zero either. Best thing is, get yourself tested. Nobody can tell you just by posts that you have or don't have HIV
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Avatar_n_tn
thank you. i realize this and i know you cant just say things to make me feel better. i just want a general idea of what my odds are.and im more worried about my boyfriend. he'll think
cheated on him if the results come back positive.and the fact that if im infected odds are he is too. and thats just terrible.
and i will be getting tested, and after this, i wll make sure this situation will never happen again for me.
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Avatar_m_tn
No need to use the IM to let people know you don't know what you're talking about.
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Avatar_m_tn
When everything else fails, we approach to our ultimate rescuer,,, The God ! Who is the God of Jesus the Christ, Moses and Muhammad. He is merciful and Kind, always listen to those who come to Him and forgive them.

My best wishes are for you,,, Don't worry, you will be fine.
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Avatar_n_tn
thank you guyz i appreciate it.
id like 2 hear what other people have 2 say 2

anyone else have any views ?
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Avatar_f_tn
I speak Spanish and in Spanish, they call it VIH/SIDA, so if he told you he had that, you probably would have recognized it.  I'm not saying don't get tested, surely you should, but the odds are in your favor, as Dr. HHH would say.  Anal sex is high risk, and even with only precum it is still high.  However, like regularjoey said, and UNLIKE what Teak said, there is a far, far smaller amount of virus in precum than in whole semen.  There have been numerous studies to document this.  There is not a zero concentration of virus in precum, but it is far less than semen, so that too is in your favor.  Since the rate of transmission is strongly correlated with viral load, your chances are lower if he did not ejaculate.  They still aren't zero, so get tested!  Best of luck to you and be safe in the future!
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Avatar_n_tn
oh thats alittle music to my ears i suppose. im still nervous about the test though. what if i do have it? will the document me and put me in some sort of system? and pester me about it? and is it possible to have HIV and an STD at the same time? and if you do get symptoms do they usually all come at one time and not go away? or do they come and go occasionally?
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Avatar_f_tn
When you go for the test, they are required by law to counsel you before AND after the test.  This is just to calm and inform all of the very nervous people who go get tested.  They will give you information about resources if you are positive, and information about safe sex whether you are negative or positive.  By law, wherever you get the test has to report a positive result to the CDC.  Some states have name based reporting, some just require that the result be reported, not the name of the person.  I'm not sure where you live, but you can look up whether or not it's name based or not.  The CDC will not release your information to anyone, not to the insurance company, not to your family, not to anyone.  It is for statistical purposes and to track diseases.  They won't pester you about it, but they will probably give you information about where you can get treated, etc.  All of this is assuming you are positive, which you don't even know yet, so don't get all freaked out about what you are going to do "now that you have HIV".  You don't know you have it, the odds are in your favor that you don't.  

To answer your other questions, yes, you can certainly have HIV and another STD and this is often the case.  If you have herpes or syphillis (syphilis) or some other STD that causes open sores in the genital/oral area, this increases your risk for getting HIV if you have unprotected sex, as it gives it another way for it to enter.  Some people never have symptoms, but about 80% of newly infected people will have a period with fever, chills, swollen lymph nodes, etc.  They usually go away in a few weeks and then the person enters the asymptomatic phase, which can last for several years, even without meds.  Some symptoms come and go, like thrush, vaginal yeast infections, etc.  This is only if you have HIV.  Take it one step at a time, go get tested, you will literally worry yourself sick if you keep thinking about all the possible symptoms you could have.  

Let us know about your result!
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Avatar_f_tn
When you go for the test, they are required by law to counsel you before AND after the test.  This is just to calm and inform all of the very nervous people who go get tested.  They will give you information about resources if you are positive, and information about safe sex whether you are negative or positive.  By law, wherever you get the test has to report a positive result to the CDC.  Some states have name based reporting, some just require that the result be reported, not the name of the person.  I'm not sure where you live, but you can look up whether or not it's name based or not.  The CDC will not release your information to anyone, not to the insurance company, not to your family, not to anyone.  It is for statistical purposes and to track diseases.  They won't pester you about it, but they will probably give you information about where you can get treated, etc.  All of this is assuming you are positive, which you don't even know yet, so don't get all freaked out about what you are going to do "now that you have HIV".  You don't know you have it, the odds are in your favor that you don't.  

To answer your other questions, yes, you can certainly have HIV and another STD and this is often the case.  If you have herpes or syphillis (syphilis) or some other STD that causes open sores in the genital/oral area, this increases your risk for getting HIV if you have unprotected sex, as it gives it another way for it to enter.  Some people never have symptoms, but about 80% of newly infected people will have a period with fever, chills, swollen lymph nodes, etc.  They usually go away in a few weeks and then the person enters the asymptomatic phase, which can last for several years, even without meds.  Some symptoms come and go, like thrush, vaginal yeast infections, etc.  This is only if you have HIV.  Take it one step at a time, go get tested, you will literally worry yourself sick if you keep thinking about all the possible symptoms you could have.  

Let us know about your result!
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Avatar_m_tn
How true is it-"Some symptoms come and go, like thrush, vaginal yeast infections, etc.  This is only if you have HIV. ". If its for girls- Then for guys if they have Groin yeast infections after several years of exposure-Then is he HIV positive@-Plz let me know-It would be great help
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Avatar_m_tn
How true is it-"Some symptoms come and go, like thrush, vaginal yeast infections, etc.  This is only if you have HIV. ". If its for girls- Then for guys if they have Groin yeast infections after several years of exposure-Then is he HIV positive@-Plz let me know-It would be great help
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Avatar_f_tn
Guys can get yeast infections just like girls, and you are right, they can be in the groin.  Rarely, there can be systemic skin infections with yeast, and thats just an itchy rash.  However, it is important to remember that just because someone has a vaginal/groin/skin yeast infection, this does not mean they have HIV at all!  Yeast is on everyone's body and different things can make it overgrow, like overuse of antibiotics.  
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Avatar_m_tn
Thanx for the Information. But does the infection go as soon as we use some creams-Antibiotics in case he has HIV.
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Avatar_m_tn
Anyone that gets a positive result is reported to their state's health department. The state health departments then report it to the CDC. It is required that all persons that test positive in the US, that their name is put in the database. As of May 2007, there are 54 states, including Guam, Puerto Rico and the Virgin Islands that have complied. Two of the fifty states have code base Vermont and Hawaii and will lose their federal funds if they don't change over to name reporting.  
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Avatar_f_tn
Not quite sure what you mean with your question, but HIV is not killed by antibiotics.  Wouldn't that be great if it were, the problem would be solved.  No, HIV is not killed by any antibiotic taken for bacterial infections.  My point about the antibiotics was that by taking antibiotics to kill off bacteria, you also kill off the bacteria which normally keep standard body yeast in check, so they can rapidly multiply.  That's why a side effect of antibiotic treatment is yeast infection.  If you are asking if normal treatments will treat yeast infections caused by an HIV dampened immune system, then the answer is in some cases yes, the yeast will clear up with normal meds.  However, some oppurtunistic infections secondary to HIV are extremely resistant to treatment and often take specialized medical regimens with combination antibiotics and antifungals.
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Avatar_n_tn
okay... here is what i experience quite a lot. but a lot of this i have gotten since i was little before i started having sex.
vaginal discharge but i was told that was from ovulating [and when i used to worry about this i asked my friends they said it could be from wearing thongs] but how can can i tell if its normal discharge or STD/HIV related?or a yeast infection?
swollen lymph node or gland behind my left ear[had it as a child, also told its probably because of my allergys (allergies) and antibotics]
fatigue.
i also suffer from depression that i had as a child.
i just recently had what a doctor called a viral infection[which worries me because i read that HIV symptoms are often confused for a viral infection] and had a very upset stomach a fever and diarrhea that lasted for a couple of days.
i get the flu or seem to have the flu quite a lot aswell[but i think that may be because i moved from a hot place like california to a much colder one,scotland.
and a few months after i got back from mexico i got sick with what was called a viral infection aswell,  it really upset my asthma with a violent cough and was sick for quite a few days ..
what do you think?????

could some of these be symptoms overlooked because i had them since i was a child?
if you do have symptoms, do you usually get them all at once? or do you just get one or the other?

does anyone know what the percentage of people in ensalda, mexico having HIV?

im stressing myself out with anxiety, my test isnt for another week, and im sooo scared.

PLEASE READ MY STORY AND THE QUESTIONS I HAVE JUST ASKED AND ENLIGHTEN ME PLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLEASE.
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Avatar_n_tn
p.s.
has anyone hear actually dealt with someone who got HIV/AIDS from pre-*** doing anal?
does anyone have any experience in that area?
please give me a ballpark number as to what the chances are of contracting the infection through pre-*** in vaginal sex causing HIV, and one in pre-*** in anal sex causing HIV.
could it not be HIV... a perhaps be a STD?
what other STD's have similar symptoms?
or is there a possibility its all in my head and i am fine, but suffeing from OCD?
dont worry i will still be getting tested.... i cant live like this....
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Avatar_n_tn
or could it not be HIV/STD and instead maybe be ....... something like cancer...

im soooo worried........
really not for me

but for my boyfriend .....
he will think i cheated on him! and then never forgive me because if i have it i most likely infected him aswell!!!!
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Avatar_n_tn
is anyone on here?????? SOMEONE PLEASE HELP ME!!!!!!
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219662_tn?1223862160
Look, you've got to calm down.  You can't know if the symptoms are HIV-related, unless you test.  There is simply no way to know, period.  The only way to know if you have HIV or not is by testing.

As far as specific risks - the risk for anal is estimated at 1%, which is very high, relative to other sexual practices.  Guiltnworry is absolutely right about viral load correlating with HIV transmission, so the fact that no ejaculation took place means that you were exposed to less virus, which turns the odds further in your favor.  You want exact numbers - they simply do not exist, because such studies can not possibly be done, as I told you.  You just have to go with the estimates.

My advice: you will be tortured by anxiety up until the point that you take the test.  So don't wait and get it over with.  And quit symptom searching, that will do you nothing but harm.
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Avatar_f_tn
I agree with regularjoey, calm down!!!  You don't know if you have it.  Have you tried calling the guy back and asking him in very slow Spanish what it is that he has?  Get up the nerve, I know it takes a lot, and take that test!  
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Avatar_n_tn
is it possible to have a lot of the symptoms, even though if you dont have HIV?
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Avatar_n_tn
i've pretty much convinced myself that i have HIV...

im scared....
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Avatar_n_tn
Hi Freekedout00 - I am very scared myself as I think I have potentially caught it too. However with repect to any testing that does not scare me at all. I live in the UK and I have no idea what happens to the reults other than I think it remains anonymous, but I have no control over that. I just need to know the answer. I have a wife and family and need to know what to do next. The only way I can do that is to test. I wish you all the luck in the world with you resolving this and getting tested. Good luck and my heart goes out to you.
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Avatar_n_tn
tell me about it man... i have a fiancee ... this will ruin everything ..... plus the fact that no matter what happens to "us" im still responsiable for ruining his life.

which is why i seek answers...
and the anxiety will be with me until i get the test result back...
and the closetest day i could get a test for is a week and half away ....
plus another 2 weeks to wait for the results ....
freaked,
so anyone that knows any answers to my questions please answer if you can.
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Avatar_m_tn
There are plenty of women who have been married to HIV infected men but never aquired the virus. Look at Magic Johnson and his wife! The chances of aquiring through vaginal sex are pretty low (1 in a 1000 for woman). The risk is higher for anal sex (1 in 200). Your risks are even less than that since he didn't ejaculate but there is no data on this. Odds are really in your favor but definitely get tested as there is no sure way to guess. Good luck!
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Avatar_n_tn
so me being a female my risk for aquiring HIV from pre-*** during vaginal sex is 1in 1000?
and 1 and 200 for anal?
since i have not had a lot of partners either is it lower?

(( i mean i dont go around having unprotected sex with people all the time.... this was a one off and i knew the guy and he was supposedly safe at the time [and at the time my only concern was geting pregnant, & i was on the pill] but now hes telling me he MIGHT have been infected with somthing while we were together.....but it was only once... imnot saying it doesnt take only one time.. but the chances are slimmer... right?  my advice to everyone on this site is no matter how much you think you know someone ALWAYS USE protection!!! until you both can confirm that you are free of everything...go to the clinic together for gods sake!!!))

arnt people who have mulitple parnters at greater risk? then me and just one?

[[[sorry if m pestering all you guyz... its my nerves...]]]
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Avatar_n_tn
well....uhhhh...
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Avatar_n_tn
i know your being honest, and you cant really tell me whats going on since i need the test.

but even after my test the woman on the phone says it will take 2 weeks to get the results back. if i ask for a rapid test, do they have to give it to me?
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Avatar_n_tn
do you really think odds are inmy favor? or are you just saying that to calm me down?

thanks for your help.
[[ i may come up with more questions for you.]]
but for now i feel alittle bit more at ease. although i have to admit the thought wont be out of my head until i do get the test results. cheers.
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Avatar_n_tn
yeah i see what your saying.
thanks.
though what i was saying is that i cant tell if what i been having is symptoms or not because a lot of them i been having before i even started having sex.
swollen lymph node or gland behind my left ear[had it as a child, also told its probably because of my allergys (allergies) and antibotics]
fatigue.
i also suffer from depression that i had as a child.
i just recently had what a doctor called a viral infection[which worries me because i read that HIV symptoms are often confused for a viral infection] and had a very upset stomach a fever and diarrhea that lasted for a couple of days.
i get the flu or seem to have the flu quite a lot aswell[but i think that may be because i moved from a hot place like california to a much colder one,scotland.
and a few months after i got back from mexico i got sick with what was called a viral infection aswell,  it really upset my asthma with a violent cough and was sick for quite a few days ..

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Avatar_n_tn
anyoe have anything to say about my last comment?
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Avatar_n_tn
okay thanks.just checking.
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Avatar_f_tn
I find something you said a few posts back a little disturbing.
You said:
"Even I through the 80's and 90's did way to many girls without protection (would not get tested because I was sure I already had it)but when my wife got pregnant she tested neg so I went and was amazed I was neg."

Correct me if I'm wrong but I translate this as meaning you thought you had HIV, but still had unprotected sex with your wife, getting her pregnant and then you were relieved to find out she was neg. and subsequently relieved that you were neg. also.
That doesn't sound like the responsible person you portray yourself as on this forum.
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Avatar_f_tn
Understood. Yes, we all make mistakes and it's good to see you turned your life around.
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Avatar_n_tn
another sleepless night... all i kept thinking is what if im that 1 person in a 1000 or the 1 person in 200 .... what if i am part of that 1% ???
i just kept looking at my fiancee, thinking how its all my fault...
i wish i could stay calm .... going be a long few weeks til i get my tests and results back.................
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Avatar_n_tn
another sleepless night...and i have missed 2 days of work because of it....  all i kept thinking is what if im that 1 person in a 1000 or the 1 person in 200 .... what if i am part of that 1% ???
i just kept looking at my fiancee, thinking how its all my fault...
i wish i could stay calm .... going be a long few weeks til i get my tests and results back................
im scared to death. i started getting in my head yesterday that it will come back negative since i only did it once and he didnt ejaculate and im not sure about "other fliuds" ... but what if i am one of those people who are just unlucky enough  to get it on a one off????
still a week until i can actually take the test....
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Avatar_n_tn
i want know , if you talk with me am from mexico living in hollands this my email adress    rasta_18sk8***@****
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