life

i have since this started almost six months . lost my kid, have not talk to any of my friends. none at all. my life has been on hold. its crazy. this forum i found to be my new life.

[LIZZIE LOU]

this has been your choice jon.  if you cannot accept your negative status...you should seek the help of a professional before you loose more than this.

[jon33070]

i will but i need the six month test. . just i.

[LIZZIE LOU]

do it

[Gonka]

what was your exporsure?

[troggs]

I'm truly sorry to hear about the loss of your child my friend, that must be crushing. I've cut off all contact as well, it's only fuel for depression thought, the people that know us best can read you like a book, and what we are going through is so intensely private due to stigmas that we feel this can not be allowed to be recognized as ill, mentally or otherwise so we make certain this is not left to chance, cutting all contacts unhealthy or not. I will be trying to work on these with council, maybe you can do as well...hang in there.

[jon33070]

thanks chap. i have to be honest with you.  i do find you annoying. i believe you are neg. i have no right to say that, but you are neg. i went through this **** a year ago thinking i hiv  pos. i wasnt. it was horrible. this time around i got exposed big time. no one on this forum has any symptoms i had or have. i got a swollen lymphnode under my leftarm that was crazy big, and a fever, also buring tongue and mouth sores . oh and weight loss. in my face and chest. about 10 to 15 pounds. which is fat mass. anyways. when you get your neg result ,im sure you will be a help to this forum about telling what stress can do. . im sorry im so scared, cause i know im pos. and when i test pos, i am going to be mad at everyone for telling me that the three month was ok. it did get me through each day  though.

[jon33070]

chris are you hiv pos? not sure

[troggs]

  Well were all annoying on MedHelp Jon-yourself included, there are very few people on here that have a personality that can be enjoyable to communicate though what i said was sincere and heartfelt. Were you using another id before? So your going through this again-what happened? What was your exposure? Funny thing about this forum is C-N-H / you and others can't stand someone who continues to be concerned after a three month negative, yet your the first to say you went through the same personal ordeal -interesting. I hope your near finding out your test result and manage to test negative regardless of what you think is going to happen for you...luck to you Jon...

[jon33070]

yeah, i hear you. no this if the first time i been on here since last six months. anyways. best of luck to you. you dont need it .you are neg. you made me think though. listen. after you get your neg result. (dont you hate that since you think your pos. lol)  dont put yourself at risk again. you will get. i do belive the more you are exposoed the more you likely you will get it. i never thought in a million years .

[LIZZIE LOU]

you are not positive and you have not only a three month negative, but a five month 1 week test to prove it.

i think your problem lies not with fear of hiv...but guilt.

[alienshadow]

guilt not hiv hell you tested way to long see what the net can do to you

[takenback]

Guilt does play a huge physiological role in the mind and can cause your mind to go in many directions. I have been there and dealt with it. Definitely go and see a professional, they will help and it is always good to have someone that you can talk to.

[troggs]

After being on the forum for the last six months and basically hitting an all time personal rock bottom throughout the process-therapy is now a must for me after this, after my next test comes back-negative (hopefully) -or- positive...good point my friend.

[troggs]

Eh, non...my depression has me not so worried about the barber for now...as you see, lol,lol...as for the hippy-not my cup of tea you know...my uncle was a hippy and his life was cut short.

allez-y,

[Cool2009]

Are u negative or pos??? I need to know that!

[LIZZIE LOU]

THIS POST IS ALMOST 12 MONTHS OLD.