please help - so scared

Hi.  

I hope you are well.  I have a series of quick questions I am hoping to get some insight on.  I am a gay male in a relationship with another gay male.  My BF and i do have unprotected sex and have always been monogomous. 10 days ago i had a very brief 'cheat' with another guy.  He was a massage therapist.  He very briefly (~10-15 seconds) gave me fellatio.  He then rubbed his penis against my rectum, pushed against but didnt go in.  If it did, it was perhaps a very brief 1/4 inch, but i kept ensuring he didnt go in.  Then, i just freaked and we stopped, jacked-off and that was the end of it.  I decided based on this, not to tell my Boyfriend and to just let it go.  I am now RIDDLED with guilt because i am worried i did put my BF at great risk, even though i thought this was safe enough sex.  Here are my questions:

1.  Now 5 days after sex with my BF and 10 days after my cheat experience (with my BF, i was insertive top, no cumming), he has some inflammed lymph nodes in both armpits.  He has no other symptoms or fever or other inflammed nodes.  they look like ingrown hairs, the size of eraser tip and are a bit red.  He said it is tender.  I AM FREAKING OUT.  Could this be ARS based on what i did sexually with this other guy?  Is this too soon for ARS for him?  I feel fine and have no symptoms.

2.  I already have HSV1 (on my butt), and assumed it would be highly ulikely to get HSV2 from the oral i received.  Is this true?  could I have given HSV2 to my Boyfriend from this cheat episode?

3.  How soon after you receive herpes can you give it to someone else?  ie, i have no signs of herpes myself, but in this 5 day window  - could i have given it to my BF?  ie, shedding?

4. Do you transmit herpes from the place where you have the outbreak?  ie, if if have HSV1 on my butt, he cannot get it from me on my penis?

5.  I have no sign of gonorrhea, assuming this issue has passed, but ill test at some point.


Please help!  I am so scared!

[Teak]

Can't help you with your guilt but you were never at risk for HIV. You need to post your other questions to STDs on the STD forum.

[alittleworried36]

thank you Teak!  Yup, i know the guilt is mine to deal with.  thanks.  For my own clarification, isnt this also too early to have ARS?  5 days post exposure?  i get that he wasnt exposed.

[Teak]

You didn't have a risk for HIV so it isn't ARS.

[alittleworried36]

well then...thats that!  :)

[kdaily]

Your herpes questions need to be asked in the Herpes forum,

You can test for Gono 1-2 weeks post exposure
Syphilis- 6weeks
NGU- 1-2 weeks.... but this was a very low risk

Any follow up questions for STDS or Herpes need to be directed to the correct forums.

[alittleworried36]

I am SO SORRY to bug you one last time.  My boyfriend now has what appears to be red bug bites (like ant bites or mosquitoe bites)  - a few on his lower back, a few on his hip and upper leg  - and these look like what is in his underarm.  Is this consistent with ARS?  I am freaking out again about this.  

i thought this is what ARS rash looks like?  he said it doesnt itch but it does hurt a bit

[Teak]

NO

[alittleworried36]

thanks.  what does ARS rash look like, usually?

[LIZZIE LOU]

ever think it could actually be bug bites?  dont make something out of nothing.

[alittleworried36]

hey LL,

I know.  i am just so scared.  it seems so coincidental.  does this look like ARS rash?  i hear conflicting reports on what that looks like

[Teak]

You didn't have a risk of contracting HIV.

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[LIZZIE LOU]

ditto...

[alittleworried36]

got it.  thanks.  sorry.