Aa
scared
Am 35 y/o male and in a committed, long term relationship with another male. While on a business trip I met another guy and we messed around. We kissed, jerked off and did mutual oral. The oral was brief (not more than 5 minutes each). He did not *** in my mouth and I didn't *** in his. I didn't detect any pre-***, although it's possible. I have very good oral health. So a little more than four weeks later, I come down with a runny/stuffy nose, headache, and cough with phlegm. Throat hurt a little and fever as well. These symptoms lasted for around 4 - 5 days then went away and pretty tired during this period.
I'm worried that I may have gotten HIV from this guy. I've spoken with him a couple of times since our encounter and shared my worry and he has told me repeatedly that he not HIV positive. The last time he tested was in January and he claims not to have engaged in anything risky since then. I have had unprotected sex with my partner since my fling with this guy and am now worried sick that I might have exposed him. I wasn't concerned at first but after I developed those symptoms I started to think maybe I was very unlucky. Teak, and others, please share your thoughts about my risk and exposure. Much appreciated.
I'm worried that I may have gotten HIV from this guy. I've spoken with him a couple of times since our encounter and shared my worry and he has told me repeatedly that he not HIV positive. The last time he tested was in January and he claims not to have engaged in anything risky since then. I have had unprotected sex with my partner since my fling with this guy and am now worried sick that I might have exposed him. I wasn't concerned at first but after I developed those symptoms I started to think maybe I was very unlucky. Teak, and others, please share your thoughts about my risk and exposure. Much appreciated.
You should not give blood if you have AIDS or have ever had a positive HIV test, or if you have done something that puts you at risk for becoming infected with HIV.
You are at risk for getting infected if you:
-have ever used needles to take drugs, steroids, or anything not prescribed by your doctor
-are a male who has had sexual contact with another male, even once, since 1977
-have ever taken money, drugs or other payment for sex since 1977
-have had sexual contact in the past 12 months with anyone described above
-received clotting factor concentrates for a bleeding disorder such as hemophilia
-were born in, or lived in, Cameroon, Central African Republic, Chad, Congo, Equatorial Guinea,Gabon, Niger, or Nigeria, since 1977.
-since 1977, received a blood transfusion or medical treatment with a blood product in any of these countries, or
-had sex with anyone who, since 1977, was born in or lived in any of these countries
You are at risk for getting infected if you:
-have ever used needles to take drugs, steroids, or anything not prescribed by your doctor
-are a male who has had sexual contact with another male, even once, since 1977
-have ever taken money, drugs or other payment for sex since 1977
-have had sexual contact in the past 12 months with anyone described above
-received clotting factor concentrates for a bleeding disorder such as hemophilia
-were born in, or lived in, Cameroon, Central African Republic, Chad, Congo, Equatorial Guinea,Gabon, Niger, or Nigeria, since 1977.
-since 1977, received a blood transfusion or medical treatment with a blood product in any of these countries, or
-had sex with anyone who, since 1977, was born in or lived in any of these countries
No, that's a fact, look it up.
If you are a man and had sex with another man even once, you may not donate blood - in the US anyway.
If you are a man and had sex with another man even once, you may not donate blood - in the US anyway.
jddkdd: first of all, there is no reason to test from this incident, whether you are gay or not. Oral play is not a way to transmit HIV. Secondly, whether you come down with a flu after 4 weeks of exposure, it is not required or mandatory to test from such miniscule risk (there was none).
and gay men not allowed to donate blood?? What bloody nonsense is this...ABSURD!
Sounds like gay-phobic mouth talking.
Sounds like gay-phobic mouth talking.
wow...Mike, thanks for your opinion. For the record, I did not consume any semen as neither one of us ejaculated in each other's mouths. There may have been pre-***, but if there was it had to have been very tiny amount since I did not detect or taste any. Also, I have very good oral health, no bleeding gums, cavities, sores, etc. Folks on other boards also have similar assessments, but the symptoms/timing are so coincidental that I worry.
COMMUNITY LEADER
If one doesn't have a risk to begin with testing is not a great idea because that'll be the trend he/she would start following after every protected exposures too.
Viral load is immaterial here since consumption of semen is not the right mechanism of HIV transmission and other factors like ****** up gums and wounds in the mouth is some thing that I won't consider here since if you really had such a bad oral condition you wouldn't be going around giving blowjobs to ya mate
Counseling would get you rid of your irrational fears and then you'd not be seeking help in forums like this.
If you're really not able to put this behind consult a specialist, seek some counseling to understand what are the practical ways for HIV transmission and info about HIV testing, yes you might have to shell out a few more bucks out of your pocket but it'll help you to know about some thing which is considered to be the most dreadful disease and get a test, I guarantee you, it'll be negative.
Viral load is immaterial here since consumption of semen is not the right mechanism of HIV transmission and other factors like ****** up gums and wounds in the mouth is some thing that I won't consider here since if you really had such a bad oral condition you wouldn't be going around giving blowjobs to ya mate
Counseling would get you rid of your irrational fears and then you'd not be seeking help in forums like this.
If you're really not able to put this behind consult a specialist, seek some counseling to understand what are the practical ways for HIV transmission and info about HIV testing, yes you might have to shell out a few more bucks out of your pocket but it'll help you to know about some thing which is considered to be the most dreadful disease and get a test, I guarantee you, it'll be negative.
Like I said, you have a microscopic chance of being infected this way, close to zero. There probably has to be a massive viral load and many other factors have to work against you.
But... when a gay man comes down with a "flu" 4 weeks after sexual contact with an unknown male, it is not a horrible idea to take the test - that's my opinion.
And taking a test is better than asking yourself endless "what if" questions. And it's much cheaper and quicker than counseling.
You should expect nothing but negative results though.
But... when a gay man comes down with a "flu" 4 weeks after sexual contact with an unknown male, it is not a horrible idea to take the test - that's my opinion.
And taking a test is better than asking yourself endless "what if" questions. And it's much cheaper and quicker than counseling.
You should expect nothing but negative results though.
COMMUNITY LEADER
I do not see 1 % risk here, there's no way you could have got infected that way, you don't need a test.
Oral is theoretical risk, if and only if you have gaping cuts in your mouth which's bleeding all the time, your gums are so pathetic that every time you try to bite an apple there's a severe blood flow and the gums ripping all over.
If the above mentioned is your condition do get tested, if not understand that practically, oral sex is no risk whatsoever.
I don't know why regjoey thinks you need to test for what ever reason, I'd say you need some counseling instead and gotta be moving on.
Oral is theoretical risk, if and only if you have gaping cuts in your mouth which's bleeding all the time, your gums are so pathetic that every time you try to bite an apple there's a severe blood flow and the gums ripping all over.
If the above mentioned is your condition do get tested, if not understand that practically, oral sex is no risk whatsoever.
I don't know why regjoey thinks you need to test for what ever reason, I'd say you need some counseling instead and gotta be moving on.
would the risk be any different if the guy was recently infected and didn't know it. I've read that recently infected people not on meds can have high viral loads and are more infectious. If that's the case, would my risk have significantly escalated putting me at risk of acquiring HIV from giving him a blow job? Again, no *** and, I think, no pre-***, although can't be 100% about the pre-***. At the very least there must not have been alot of pre-*** because I did not detect any. Plus good oral health and brief session. Also, he continues to say not positive.
So that you know who to advise to give blood.
American Red Cross
BLOOD DONATION ELIGIBILITY GUIDELINES
http://www.redcross.org/services/biomed/0,1082,0_557_,00.html#std
American Red Cross
BLOOD DONATION ELIGIBILITY GUIDELINES
http://www.redcross.org/services/biomed/0,1082,0_557_,00.html#std
Thanks again for taking the time to respond. Your insight and advice are a HUGE help.
I don't think you should, no.
The medical benefit would be minimal, because the odds you will test poz are just too low.
But there may be psychological benefit, for your own peace of mind.
Since you are worried, why torture yourself for another 3 months?
Many places give you a free 30-min test.
Just do what's best for you.
The medical benefit would be minimal, because the odds you will test poz are just too low.
But there may be psychological benefit, for your own peace of mind.
Since you are worried, why torture yourself for another 3 months?
Many places give you a free 30-min test.
Just do what's best for you.
I had the same situation only hetero. The thought that I may have infected someone was killing me and no one thinks rationally when confronted with genuine fear. Anxiety kicks in, Panic Attacks kick in and we fear the worse. Or minds cause our bodies to respond. You will be fine, your risk is astronomically low.... You don't need to test but probably should just for piece of mind and to resolve your guilt. DR HHH is a genuine expert, and here is some additinal data:
http://www.dph.sf.ca.us/sfcityclinic/stdbasics/stdchart.asp
Expect a NEGATIVE!!
God bless!
http://www.dph.sf.ca.us/sfcityclinic/stdbasics/stdchart.asp
Expect a NEGATIVE!!
God bless!
Thanks both for your comments. Maybe being irrational but the thought that I may have put someone else that I care about at risk is killing me. Learned a good lesson. I get tested annually (next due in Oct. 2007) as part of my wellness examination with my doc. Just wasn't sure, since I have a partner, if I should test sooner since my actions might have been very risky.
If you're worried, take a test 2-3 months post your incident.
But expect negative results, your risk was very low.
But expect negative results, your risk was very low.
Maybe this quote from DR HHH. will help:
Forum-M.D.-HHH
7/11/2007
"chris1983 Just look rationally at the odds. It is said the risk of acquiring HIV from a single episode of receiving fellatio from an HIV-infected partner is around 1 chance in 10,000. By itself, that translates into a daily BJ by an infected partner for 27 years before you would expect to catch the infection. And your partner says he doesn't have HIV! But let's say there is a 1% chance he is infected, either because he is lying or he was in the window period the last time he was infected. That makes your chance of having caught HIV 0.01 x 0.0001 = 0.000001. That's one in a million. And that, my friend, is 37 times less likely than the chance you will die someday of a lightning strike (if you live in North America.
There are no 'conflicting data' about the low risk of oral transmission of HIV. There are only conflicting nonscientific opinions and advice. No, I have never seen someone with HIV acquired by receiving oral sex. But since there might be only 10 or fewer people in the entire US (and maybe none!) who acquired their HIV infections that way, of course I would not expect to ever see such a person."
This is for receiving, there are others for giving. Basically Oral is extremely low risk...so much so, its hardly worth worrying about. Plus your symptom don't sound like ARS and it normally occurs within 7 to 14 day (roughly).
If you are really concerned you should test it's the only for sure way to know..but expect a negative. God bless.
Forum-M.D.-HHH
7/11/2007
"chris1983 Just look rationally at the odds. It is said the risk of acquiring HIV from a single episode of receiving fellatio from an HIV-infected partner is around 1 chance in 10,000. By itself, that translates into a daily BJ by an infected partner for 27 years before you would expect to catch the infection. And your partner says he doesn't have HIV! But let's say there is a 1% chance he is infected, either because he is lying or he was in the window period the last time he was infected. That makes your chance of having caught HIV 0.01 x 0.0001 = 0.000001. That's one in a million. And that, my friend, is 37 times less likely than the chance you will die someday of a lightning strike (if you live in North America.
There are no 'conflicting data' about the low risk of oral transmission of HIV. There are only conflicting nonscientific opinions and advice. No, I have never seen someone with HIV acquired by receiving oral sex. But since there might be only 10 or fewer people in the entire US (and maybe none!) who acquired their HIV infections that way, of course I would not expect to ever see such a person."
This is for receiving, there are others for giving. Basically Oral is extremely low risk...so much so, its hardly worth worrying about. Plus your symptom don't sound like ARS and it normally occurs within 7 to 14 day (roughly).
If you are really concerned you should test it's the only for sure way to know..but expect a negative. God bless.
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