Whats worse??

I play in a bunch of rock bands. Loud Loud LOUD! I play shows alot and I know I have done damage to my hearing. I can tell and so can the people around me. My question is, When I play shows, I wear these in ear headphones. They block out a good amount of sound but not much and they keep what I hear in the headphones pretty issolated in my ears. My question is, Whats worse... Hearing the loudness of the music without any protection in my ears, OR hearing this LOUD clicking noise (metranome) in my headphones that is painful for anyone else that trys to were them like I do?

Also, What does it mean if for a day or 2, the things you hear are all distorted?

[Wear/a/Jimmy]

The distortion means you have damaged your ears.....  

Which is worse, with or without IEMs.  Probably without, depending on if you are using wedges or not.

It seems to me that you know very little about SPL, and hearing....

To be blunt, you will be deaf sooner rather than latter.