High Blood Pressure and Med Side Effects

I have high blood pressure.  Without meds most often it runs in the 140/90- 150/90's but about once a month it will go up as high as 190/106.  When it gets to be in the 170's I feel very bad, like I am gonna have a stoke or something,  I have tried to control it without meds, but it doesn't work. I need to be on something.   My problem is side effects.  I have tried HCTZ, Toporal XL, Atacand, Verapamil, and now I am on Coreg.  Right now my blood pressure is controlled in the 120s/70s but I have extreme dizzziness, blurry vision, ringing in my ears.  I am taking the insanely low dose of 6.25 1/2 pill every other day!  But the doctors cannot discount the fact that on this low dose my blood pressure has gone down.  If I take more, then things get much worse!  Headache at the base of my skull, SOB, general agitaion and sensitivity to light, sound, and movement.  If I take too little I have withdrawl (withdrawal) symptoms which are much the same.  The med that worked best for me was toporal XL, initially I had very few side effects but after being on it 2 yrs I started needing a higher dose and this brought on bad side effects of dizziness, wheezing, coughing, and chest pains.
I have seen an allergist who says I am a slow metabolizer.  Meds stay in my system longer then usual.  This is ruining my life.  I am darned if I take the meds and darned if I don't.  I am at my wits end.  I have not seen straight in 4 months.  The doctors are getting fed up with me and seem to just wish I would go by the book.  I just want someone to help.  I purposely do not look at med side effects before I take the meds because I do not want to be accused by doctors of having psychosomatic complaints.  However I have found that SOMEONE needs to know what the side effects are in case I should stop the meds because the doctors don't seem to care how I feel as long as the blood pressure is controlled.  These meds can be dangerous though, and my hub reads about them and then if I complain he can tell me if its likely from the med.  I don't know what to do anymore.  The life I used to know is gone.  IS there a such thing as a doctor who deals with pts who are medication sensitive?