What would you advise?

[Rosemary349]

I really appreciate this forum and the many knowledgeable people on here.....so am wondering if you can advise me from this point onwards.

My dad, as a number of you know died suddenly from a ruptured MI five weeks ago.  As i said before, he wasn't a 'typical' heart attack victim.  He was reasonable weight, didn't eat fatty foods, didn't smoke and his blood pressure was always normal when he had medicals for his job.  He didn't have a cholesterol check though as far as i'm aware.  He'd had indigestion for two days but on a medical helpline they said it just sounded like a stomach bug.  So i guess when he died suddenly that was the result of the ruptured heart muscle which could have been saved if we'd got him checked out earlier.  The weirdest thing was that the day he died the indigestion had started to go away.

I am totally devastated and my life will never be the same.

Now i'm having to deal with my own panic.  I'm terrified of this happening to me.  I was never afraid before because i used to say that i cannot control that sort of thing..........but now i've seen it happen.  As i've said before i'm terrified that it feels like suffocating.  I'm terrified of anyone being near me and screaming (my mother was screaming when it happened to dad and i just hope he didn't hear)....i'm terrifed of being alone, i'm terrified of not dying quickly enough.....

you get the picture...  :-(

The ONLY thing i can control is how i look after myself.  I am currently reassessing my whole diet.  but the problem is this is all so unpredictable.  

So it would help if i could look at all the ways in which i can help myself now.  Physically and mentally.

*  Physically i am working on my diet (although like dad's was, it actually isn't that bad)
*  I am going to go back to my martial arts class (but i am worried about the ectopics that i get, which can occur with exercise)
*  I have had a stress test and get regular cholesterol checks as i have an underactive thyroid

*  I am requesting that i see a cardiologist for further advice

Mentally......I don't know what to do.  I know some of you have told me that you don't think a heart attack feels like suffocating but that's what i still keep thinking about.  I will maybe see if i can get help with this.  The thing is i come here for reassurance and it helps, but i also realise that in anxiety terms....keep seeking reassurance actually maintains the anxiety.....

thoughts?

I really appreciate your time  :-)

[mammo]

I'm so sorry to hear about your dad.  I think you should seek some therapy to help you get through this difficult time.  I lost my dad when I was 25 in a car accident caused by him having a heart attack.  He was returning from getting some Alka Seltzer for what he thought was "indigestion" and my mom was with him, and she died from injuries suffered in the accident.  You can do so much for your heart starting now.  Eating correctly, exercising, and living with as little stress as possible. Keep a check on your cholesterol because this can be a silent killer.  Heart attack symptoms vary, especially with women, so research the symptoms. But a cardiologist once told me that it is often a good thing when a young person suffers a mild heart attack because it makes them aware of how important diet, exercise and stress is where the heart is concerned.  So, they change their life style and turn out to be much healthier people as they age. I think in much the same way,  losing your dad, was a "wake-up call for you.  There is nothing you could have done to save your dad, so don't fret over this. It's normal for you to feel afraid after witnessing this, and with time it will get better, I promise.  I don't know how, I just know it does.  Be vigilant with your health, but don't obcess over it.  You want to have a happy life and obcessing will cause you stress which will defeat the purpose of all your efforts.  Do your best, that's all you can do.  Take care....

[Rosemary349]

Mammo

thankyou so much for your reply!  You are right, stressing won't help at all.  Right now it's hard....if i could just feel better about the 'suffocation' worry that would help....

RE stress.  That was the one thing that my dad had far too much of.  He wasn't an anxious person like me, but in the last two years he was almost reposessed, had a lot of financial pressure....and he was a 'type A' character as well.  He would go to bed really late and get up really early - a four hours a night man.

I've been similar because, up to now i thought that dad and I thrived on it.  Now i have to re-think....but i never thought stress would have such an effect, unless there was already heart disease present...it doesn't cause it does it?

I'm so sorry to hear about your mum and dad.  That is awful.  There are so many stories like this....it makes me wonder are we succeeding in preventing heart attacks at all?   It's strange because the day before my dad drove me up to the shop to get an indigestion remedy and it flashed through my mind that if he collapsed at the wheel i would have to try and steer (or brake!) - but i dismissed the thoughts as anxiety.  So many people have tried to get me to dismiss my thoughts and label them as anxious over the years.  Fact is, I knew this would happen to my dad.....i've known for years, i don't know how, it was just a feeling i had.

Thanks again mammo!

[Rosemary349]

I've been to my GP and told that my overall cholesterol 'ratio' was 2.5.  he said this was good.....one of the levels was 4.5, but i'm not sure whether that was HDL or LDL....

these are levels measured back in 2005....so he has arranged for me to have another fasting blood test this week

He also said that my dad most probably had CAD, that his heart attack is unlikely to have struck out of the blue - but because he didn't seem to get angina or any symptoms then none of us knew

thoughts?

[ed34]

Hi again Rosemary,

I have just been doing more research into heart disease and I've come across something rather interesting which shocked me. We are all told to lay off saturated fats, or at very least cut them right down. However, trans fats are much much worse than saturated fats and are really a heart disease poison for the body with no benefits whatsoever. I was under the impression that trans fats were no longer used but sadly I've learned they are.
Denmark and switzerland have banned these fats from all foods including imports, but the UK imports many products from abroad with these fats in them. Hydrogenated vegetable oil may be another name on the label, or HVO or tans fats. Whatever they decide to call them, they are really bad for anyones heart and should be avoided like the plague. There is also a huge debate going on in the UK at the moment regarding milk. Our dairy farmers are going out of business due to cheap milk being imported from the US. However, it has come to our attention that the cows producing this milk are being fed growth hormones which is known to cause a variety of cancers. Its getting so bad with foods that I think Im going to rent a plot of land and grow my own crops.