morphines diease

[510vicious]

i was diagnosed with morphines diease around 12 or 13 years old. was told there were varying degrees and i was on the lesser side not to worry.he even told me a lot of athletes had it as well and if anything i might be better at sports than i would have been  without it  . Thats all that was really told to me then was schedualed  twice a year check ups  x rays of chest and ekg and some kinda reflex test that was quite bit more involved just a tap on the knee . we moved to texas and really didnt even think to bother with finding a doctor and keep getting bi annual checks. my first doctor led me to believe(not sure if my parents were alittle more informed than i was or not) that there was nothing to worry about at my last check up with him he mildly mentioned a concern that my rib cage was increasing excelerated growth less uniformly then they were. his concern was the denser might easily cause the less dense to break if i kept playing football and suggested that i wrap them for games. that was it really  and i already wasnt doing that and nothing happened (at that age the last thing iwanted was to draw attention myself or look weak.) so about a year and half later(without the check ups) i was 14 almost 15 and  i had 2 seziours for no apparent reason (the first i was just with my brother and didnt know what had happened but i came out of it and seemed fine more less so we didnt tell anyone the second happened just before christmas in front of my whole family and was much longer than the first one i blacked out came to went out and etc. it might have only been 5 to ten minutes and thinking back to it it seemed relatively short period of time but at the time i remember having a feeling of being trapped for a life time if that makes sence. at the hospital they first thought it was a drug overdose and when i was stable my first memory besides fear was somebody telling me the drugs i had done had messed up my brain and there was no telling how bad the damage was and i needed to tell them what kind and where i got them so no other kids got the same bad drugs i did. i even got yelled at cause i kept telling them i hadnt taken any drugs at all. it wasnt till after my blood work came in they put it together me and my parents wernt any help didnt even think to mention the morphines disorder to anyone cause of my previous doctor lack of warning . after several cat scans and and M.R.I.'s and DIFFERENT KINDS OF E.K.G.'S . WHILE I WAS ASLEEP -AWAKE-TALKING- . they even tested me the same on  a couple different food diets. at one point they thought i had all kind of disorders everyday somthing else was wrong with me. thankfully a doctor requested my file from my youth and put it all together. it did cross his mind he said noticeing my chest but kinda like the other doctor had said outwardly my apperence  and extremities enough in poportion compared to i guess other people that had it he didnt pursue it any further . i was sent to a specialist who did alot of the same test they had ran at the hospital and didnt find much more out than was already known my left brain was for the most part a half size bigger than the right , my aorda was twice as active and much larger than it should be . and the left top part (i think was just the top) was like as big as the rest of my heart also he said somthing like the conctions to the musel and bone were to small or somthing and and i could never really play sports or be to active cause they will evently break and more dangerous was he said was that my heart would eventually tear in half . the preasure or swelling of exerting myself (he even referenced elvis shiting on the tolite) could cause more seziures or block air to parts of my brain . this was the only they could attribt to my 2 seziures even though both times i was not really being active at all . the doctor tried to explain that prior in the day when i was active coused swelling that when was relaxing later let too much air or blood in my brain. so basicly this doctor scrared the **** out of me. he literally told me that even taking all his precautions my heart wouldnt let me live too much past 30 . it would ethier break off or the other half would increase as well working double time to keep up with the large part pumping blood out faster than it should, would one day be too close to my rib cage that a slight bump might rip it open . he did fail to show us or my then regular doctor any sustantial drops or other signs of anything we did EKGS AND MRI'S  at rest- on a treadmill-after being active . my blood presure (he almost seemed mad i remember thinking) and rythem while iregular they both stayed very consistant and strong. also my IQ and reasoning skills  where as high as ever ( the only thing i can say was lacking and i cant be sure but after the seziures much latter on really when it occured to me. that my hand writting and ability to draw were now a struggle but it could also have been when i broke my wrist). well this doctor had convinced me i was gonna die regardless. so i gave up on being his test subject he wasnt treating anything the few treatments he did consider he said would only cause other problems. and i was tried of hearing alll this stuff was wrong with me when i felt fine.  I kept playing football and baseball  my mom did talk me into quiting running track witch I didnt really was getting bored with anyway. i made Varsity football and JV baseball my junior year my senior spring i took early college courses. now if anyone dose read this . i appologize for the lengh. i kinda used this to help myself recall everything that might be important. because i really tried not to think about it too much. that doctor good intentions or not really messed with my head and i didn't want to live life worring about dying all the time to the opposite. i've to a degree thought of myself invinsible or really really lucky. I blocked that all awady so much that ive been to doctor 3 times since once was a job injury and was forced to go the other to were at the hospitals the two days my kids were born. they are the only reason i'm concerned  at all now i'm 28 years old and as far as i now i'm in great shape but i now feel i should for my wife and kids sake at least check everything. so my question  to those who can help am i calling it the right name or just not spelling it right or even i might have took a word they said repeatally and gave it my own name (i doubt that cause i have met one other person in my journeys with it).but i cant find anything close to what i'm looking for online.  i'm sure by the time someone reads this and responds i will have made the appointment and got my answers but whenever anyone dose read this and can offer advise,similar story, or anouther soul worried about what some ****** up doctor told them, or hopefully someone who can relate to me but in thier late 40's or 50's and can let me know thier alive and fine would be great be it today or 3 years from know would like to hear from you'll. I've made it this far and had a blast and I feel i'm still as good as ever , but my birthday is yhe 24th of this month and the same thought keeps cycling back through my kids are 6 and 5 I just need 15 or 20 years more. I mean I'll take as long as i can get and on the other hand I'm not scraed of dying ethier I lived a good life. I'm just terrified that I'll not be thier for them and let them down or somthing. I mean if i do find out stuff has gotten worse how the hell do I tell a 6 year old his daddy might die soon. hell no i can't do that but I'm not sure how they'll would feel for me to maybe just die right in front of them and they not have any idea what to do. like i said i'm know everything will be okay and delaying actually going to get checked only can make things worse. i just would really like to have some knoweledge of my own


This discussion is related to 15 year old diagnosed with enlarged mitral valve.