About how I am doing, sound familar?

[Vic1967]

Miserable.
I am about halfway through and at this point I thought I would be doing better.  In the beginning I was sicker. Nausea, dizzy, diarrhea, itchy, coughing, etc. But through all that I never felt really bad.  I was o.k. while having those sx.  Now that a lot of that has lessened in severity I seem to feel worse than ever.  I have really bad headaches and am tired of feeling so crummy and tired all the time. I know mentally I am struggling.  I am have always been bubbly and optimistic and a strive to push on, even when it's hard. Now I really just want to lay down most of the time. I am irritable and low.  I am struggling with the two sides of this. On one hand I know I am in tx, I have a reason why I am feeling like this and that when I am tired I should listen to my body and lay down, it will pass. The other side tells me to fight it, be productive, do not lay down. I am wondering now more and more about the AD's. I have never taken these and the only experience I have is through my sister who is an addict!
What do they do?  Is it like a motrin when you have a headache?  What is your experience in real terms? I guess why I am resistant is because I know it's the drugs that keep me from feeling like myself and I HATE THE HAZE!  Do the AD meds help without adding to the fog?
Reading all about your experiences has helped me tremendously.  I have felt validated and you make me laugh with your terms, "riba rage", "bitchavirin".  So true. But then if I read too much I worry when I read about the relapsers.  We all knew it isn't a sure thing. But when I see that when I am already bummed, it doesn't help.
Sigh!
Tell me if this sounds familiar.
V
p.s Of course my ever present optimism has to point out that this isn't constant, all day every day. But enough to obviously concern me.

[14cheri]

I am on 225 mgs effexor. Was on it yrs before tx. Started taking more during tx. They do no make me feel different. I am just not as irritable and the depression is not as bad.I am half way through tx hope to cut down after tx. They did make me gain weight. I went from 120-25 normally to 145. I am trying to lose it. I used to work out almost every day. Now I rarely do. i'm sure that is alot of the problem
Good Luck

[Kristina538]

.. Sounds familiar?  Sure does.  I found myself getting through initially only to find that the ongoing ongoing plethora of continual sx's, difficulties, challenges happening to me were starting to spiral into a dark miserable colourless place.    

I tried AD's (once) and had a mild reaction and wasn't brave enough to try again.  I did bury myself in books (only autobiographies of other peoples challenges - and nothing too heavy).  I would force myself to read the page 7 times before switching myself to another book - if I could manage to get through the first couple of pages it hooked me and helped the time pass.     I took photos of birds,  I tried to buy food I'd enjoy and I kept on allowing myself to be a patient.   I counted the moons.  I watched American Funniest Home Videos;  laughing helped and it was the only show I could concentrate on without losing the plot.  

If I had to do it again, I'd find an AD prior to tx;  they've certainly helped people go the extra mile and finish the course.  Thoughts are with you ...

[Isobella]

Yes, that sounds very familiar.I remember riding the line between being up and productive and total vegging out.  For me there was a time for both.  I worked part time and went to school part time through out my 48 weeks and never missed a day of either....except for one time I completely forgot to go to work.

I took Zoloft, started at 50 mg and then halfed it to 25 mg a day.  Following the advice from the forum, I took it at night to lessen the sleepy-effect from it.  I was very pleased with it.  I weaned myself off at EOT, but probably could have stood to take it a little longer.  

Upping my water intake usually took care of my tx-headaches.

Good luck to you.  Hang in there...it is soooo worth it in the end to be done with HCV

Isobella

[Lynno711]

I was evaluated and put on antidepressants a month before I started tx. .5 mg Risperidone/day.  My mood was for the most part level all the time I was txing.  The first two months I had bouts of Riba Rage, lost it in the Laundermat one day, I was so embarassed, I was able to control it after that.  Other than that things went smoothly for me.  Now 2 month post tx. Doc. will start to wean me off.

I also had no energy all the way through tx.  But now that its over with I barely remember those days of laying in bed.

Don't be afraid to ask the Doc. for some kind of help, its only for the short term, and certainly made things easier for me.

Good Luck - Lynne

[Kathy73]

Oops! Forgot to talk about the headaches. I had them all through tx and still have them. My GP finally put me on a form of vicodin (Norco/has less tylenol) and that has really helped. I'll have to wean off of them, but they were a lifesaver.

[Kathy73]

I agree with NewLeaf09. My doctor put me on Celexa after I let him "have it" after his office messed up one more time. Since then I've switched doctors, but the Celexa has really helped me to stay on course and not be unreasonable at the office and at home. I also felt so tired and weak on SOC. My suggestion is for you to lay down and get your breath back whenever you get tired. Don't force yourself to be productive. I took a shower and then laid down. I got dressed and then laid down. You get the idea. I took my shots on Thursday evenings because I got hit hardest on Saturday and Sunday and it was important for me to keep working. I worked through tx and only took one "sick and tired" day off the whole time. I just took my last shot last week and am looking forward to finally having energy. I still felt some haze or fog while on tx, but relied on post-its as reminders so I wouldn't mess up at work. The AD just kept me from going overboard on the emotional side. Let me know if I can help.

[newleaf09]

Finding the right AD for you can be a challenge.  It took me about a month and 4 or 5 different ones to get one that did not ruin my sleep and smoothed out the bumps.  They should only 'fog you up' if you are on a greater dose than you actually need to control your particular mood disorder.  I finally ended up on Lexapro, 10 mg, but reduced it after a few weeks to 5mg, which did the trick without making me over-agreeable or over-compliant or forgetful.  I actually never even noticed it (except for not being mean anymore) nor did my husband, who is anti-mood meds.  I started stopping it about a 2 weeks after TX ended, weaning off off of it slowly for 3-4 weeks with no ill effects.

The beat-up way you feel is normal and it never got any easier for me, either.  I guess I just got used to feeling 'blah' and didn't try to alter anything (I doubt if I could have anyway).  I can tell you that at nearly 5 mos. post EOT, I feel completely normal, happy and good.  It's getting harder and harder to imagine how I felt on TX, just remember that I was very sick and spent most of the time lying down.  Still glad I worked so hard at it.