Problems with work

I cut my hours at work because of the extreme fatique but then increased them because I kept getting behind in my work plus needed the money (fiance was laid off about the time I cut my hours).  I know since I've been working more my work has also been slacking because I am just exhausted all the time.  I have a meeting that I have to sit and take notes in that lasts over 4 hours and between the pain and being tired it's too much for me.  Now yesterday the HR director talked to me about my work performance.  She is going to talk to my bosses next week and they will make a decision what to do so now with everything else going on I have to worry about being demoted or loosing my job.  They do know that I am treating and have been good about letting me take off for doctor appts or the occasional days when I can't drag my body in.  I am on week 37 of 48 so I know I've almost made it but right now it seems like it is getting the best of me.  I've lost over 20 pounds and look like a skelton at 107 pounds.  I have an apt tomorrow with my regular dr to see about getting on something for depression but I know that takes time to work.  I also have fibromyalgia, COPD and a few other things.  It's too hard to get on disability and takes forever if you are approved that I'd probably loose my house and everything else.  I just don't know what to do.  HR gave me no choice but to go down on my hours but I can't get my work done and need the money.  But I also am killing myself by working so much right now.  I also have a senior in high school that can be very taxing at times so I'm trying real hard not to pull out the hair that isn't falling out.  Thanks for listening.  

[oneatenuff]

If your employer has been good so far, that's to their favor (yours too) and they have given you hours.  If you need the money but can't work, you aren't left with too many options at this point but to file for disability.  It's a pain in the a** to file, it's a humiliatating process, but .... what else are you going to do?   It might take a few years, but it might not.  Depending on your age, your health problems, your diagnoses, your docs' involvement, the meds you are on or have been tried on, you could possibly get some assistance now and get a favorable ruling on the disability within a year.   If you're headed to the soup kitchen for your next meal or anticipate losing everything, you really need to do something now and not wait - regardless of how long it might take to get disability.

If you own a house, you might be SOL on immediate assistance like food stamps or Medicaid or assistance with utilities  (yeah... nose dive time)  but that doesn't mean you should not apply for disability and public assistance now.   Your child (children) might be eligible for something as well.  

I've seen people get SSDI  (disability) within a year because they filed on account of hep c OR because they were sick on treatment or sick after treatment.   Being diagnosed and on medication for depression will be a huge plus if you file for disability.   In fact, it will be essential.   Also, you're on treatment for hep c, which is also a huge PLUS for getting disability.  You can apply for disability and continue working some hours (and even be getting disability and working some hours)  and hope the fatigue and depression will stop after you complete treatment and that you can return full-time to work and get off disability.  But... if you ever do get disability, I wouldn't advise going back to work full-time because you will totally lose your disability and never get it again.   But if you're "cured" and if you bounce back in a few years and feel like your old self, that'll be great - sure, go back to work full time.  

Since things seem to be getting worse, you should truly start the process of filing for disability and have some of the foot work out of the way before you feel like doing absolutely nothing, possibly.  It's not a pleasant process "filing" at all  (it's time consuming, it's aggravating, it will pi** you off, it's depressing, etc.)  but if you're disabled, then you're disabled.

If you're going to go the disability route, get seen by a doctor for depression and get on something for depression.   Keep going to appointments - don't miss one.   Make sure the doctor(s)  is behind your disability "case" and that they are supportive of your decision  (meaning they'll be willing to help you get it and help you with anything your current employer might ask of you in the way of a "doctor's note".)  

For the disability, a doc has to be willing to spell out specifically the reasons you cannot work and that it's expected - due to medical reasons or illness - that you'll be unable to work for at least the next 12 months.   If you want to continue SOME work now and still file for disability, you can  (but get the doc to limit your hours of work due to illness.)

The alternative to anti-depressants to treat depression  (or to treat fatigue)  if an antidepressant does not work for you  (and some people with hep c and/or on treatment don't find any relief with anti'd's and feel worse)  are "drugs" to help keep you awake  (specifically Provigil or Ritalin.)   Ask your hep doctor if you're OK to try a course of something like Provigil or Ritalin.   If you're not cirrhotic, and if you're falling asleep and about to lose a job and possibly everything you own because you can't hold your head up, your doc should be willing to try something.   I'm on Provigil and also have two friends who are on it  (both have Hep C for greater than 30 years, have been through treatment twice, one was on treatment when Provigil was begun, livers are OK to take the Provigil and/or the Ritalin.)    We have hepatologists  (not just GI or "liver doctor".)   If you go to a GP or a psychiatrist for depression, you can get some free samples of the Provigil  (7 day supply)  from either doctor.   Just ask them for it.   It beats paying for it because it's very expensive.   Then ask them if they have samples they can give you.   They might supply you with some 14 day samples packs, and that might be enough to last you two  months.   You never know until you try.  

Ritalin is cheap.   If you've ever had a problem with addiction, I wouldn't advise getting on Ritalin.  

You don't have to take either of those suggested drugs every day.  

If the docs  (your GP / your therapist, etc.)   don't want to help you by prescribing medications to treat your symptoms, find a doc who will.   Talk to a disability attorney.  They're free - no cost to you.

Good luck.

[Trinity4]

FMLA - You are entitled to it.  Does your company offer any short term or long term disability.

It's very hard and I've seen no cases on this forum where someone get's SSDI during treatment or after unless they've treated many times or are at ESLD.  Treatment one time doesn't usually incapacitate someone to the point they are disabled but I suppose it does happen.  If you have a good paying job with good benefits, by all means in this economy you want to continue to work.  I dare say it would take longer than 1 year IF you were considered for SSDI.

Good Luck, you're almost there.  Try to get through it.  AD's are an option for the depression.  Provigil is for extreme fatigue and I have 4 boxes of samples but I've been reluctant to take it because of the side effects.

Trinity

[nygirl7]

FMLA - You are entitled to it.  Does your company offer any short term or long term disability.

Yes - there are LAWS in place to protect you.  I don't know what state you are in but it sounds like HR needs to be reminded. If you can speak to a lawyer and find out and then let them know....you have so few weeks left to go that they should just deal with it! For the time being they can bring in someone to handle a few things to help you out and be damn understanding about it!

My boss (was the WORST ARHG!) when I treated. Boy did he want to fire me. He actually did eventually hire someone else to do my job and sat me at a desk with NOTHING to do (and he reminded me when he did this not to say anything bad about him because I needed my insurance). Well.................eventually I ended up coming up to help HIS boss (the big big boss at this company) and this man didn't mind that I had hep (my old boss thought I was a leper and actually spoke to me about not looking so great any longer) and understood that I wasn't feeling so great and APPRECIATED the efforts I was putting in.  He ended up hiring me up here full time about 3 years ago. So now whenever my old boss has to see him he has to go past ME  :)

I only said all that so you can have some faith that even when things seem bad they do work out for the best as long as you don't give up. Believe me when I worked for that pig (and he was my God he'd even say things like 'your boobs are looking good today' if you can believe it) I thought it just couldn't get worse. My hemo was under 9 and I could barely walk. had grey skin and no hair and was a skeleton and knew i had to treat for 72 weeks.......and I HATED coming to work and cried every single day.

Now, my hair is grown back and I wish I could lose a couple of pounds! I have a GREAT boss and have been SVR for over 2 years.

There were lots of days that I had wanted to give up and I am so glad I couldn't.  It paid off.

Hang in there.  Talk to them reasonably and act a little dense and tell them someone you know mentioned some FLMA act, what is that about? Do some googling if you can to find out your particular state laws or find a govt. agency that might be able to help you with that. Maybe it will let them know you aren't going down without a fight and they will realize that getting rid of you will be a lot worse than just waiting the 11 weeks until you start to feel better.

It WILL get better, just don't give up and let it get to you.

GOOD LUCK!

[oneatenuff]

Great point on the FMLA - if you have it.   I had it and used it two years.

On the disability - (I've got go say this)  You do not have to be at ESLD to get disability.  That's why it's important to be under the care of a psychiastrist and be seen for the mental component and get put on medications (specifically anti depressants or something to treat the symptoms.)   Depression is the number one reason people are granted disability.  Treatment causes depression.   Hep C causes it.  You might have to do a second round of treatment.  You might not bounce back for a while after this round.   In other words, you have what it takes to be depressed  (severely depressed) and a reason to not be able to work.    Please don't delay filing for disability if you think you are on a path to becoming jobless due to Hep C and the treatment.   That time will pass anyhow.  If you can work - fine, continue to work by all means, but don't let the fear of an unsuccessful claim prevent you from filing for SSDI.  People do get it, and the sooner someone with Hep C who believe they truly can't continue to work files that claim, the better off they'll be.   I know several people who have Hep C, they aren't ESLD, they're in their mid to late 50's, they aren't on death's bed, and they filed for and got their SSDI due to hep C, depression, and the inability to work due to depression, chronic fatigue, or inability to work due to the treatment for Hep C  (states of WA, PA, NC, and VA).  

Trinity, I was reluctant at first, too.  If you ever feel that your fatigue is to the point it's incapacitating you and AntiD's haven't worked and you want to try the Provigil, start out with just a half of 200 mg.  See how you do.   I didn't feel anything speedy like I was afraid I would.   I slept OK, too.  The drug has greatly improved my quality of life, and the years of depression have lifted.  You don't have to take the drug everyday, either.   I sometimes go for over a week and don't take it,  but when I begin to have several days that I feel like I can't get up, I have it.  Point being - I was once scared of it, but I found out it's the best thing they've ever given me to treat my fatigue / depression.   I get my hep panels done every three months - so far so good.

[nygirl7]

PS An AD will take a month to work but for me it worked WONDERS.  The only problem was the first month I started it (I was not even on tx yet) I was falling asleep on my desk I was so tired from it - so make sure you take it at night!

Just thought I'd mention that cause you are so exhausted as it is!

[Trinity4]

At week 38 I don't think I'd make any decisions about disability until I knew exactly how I was going to fare in the big scheme of things.  SSDI does not pay that much and it doesn't sound like Michelle has reached the point of no return yet.    

Working for me has been a life saver and I've experienced and continue to experience much of what Michelle is going through.  Her degree of discomfort may be greater than mine but in my case I won't let my illness define me, that is why I continue to push everyday and I'm doing 72 wks.  I've got five months left so if the fatigue doesn't lift I will try the Provigil.  I've never had severe depression prior or during tx so not on any AD's but again, if I needed them I would try it although my experience with them in the past has been unsuccessful.  
In my opinion, she should wait and see if the psycological problems can be controlled with medications.
I guess I'm just not one to look at things with such finality as SSDI suggests a last resort to me and I just don't hear that tone in Michelle's post.
Trinity
  

[HectorSF]

I just reread your posting...
DON'T GO BACK TO WORK! Get a note from your doctor NOW, Monday, as soon as you can see your doctor then to go on disability until you finish treatment and have recovered. They can't do anything as long as you are not at work. How can they demote you or fire you when you aren't there??? Legally they can't. When you return they will have realized that they were crossing the line and probably will never mention this whole again.

Disability is just a little note your doctor fills out. You just need your treating doc to fill out the paper work. It's simple and they have done it many times before. Nothing for you to worry about. The doc writes that you have a major illness and are under their care and will probably be returning to work at such and such time. You have 90 days before they can replace your position at work. (Did work tell you this? mmm didn't think so.) So your job is secure. AS LONG AS YOU STAY AWAY FROM WORK. That is why you don't want to say another work to anyone at work, just go on disability ASAP. If you go back to work they can get rid of you for performance reasons or anything they want to make up. The first check will come in 3-4 weeks and will be back dated to a day or so after your last day at work. So you will be paid when you are on disability.

Remember HR can't ask you anything about your health. It is illegal and they all know it. It's the law! Just fax the doctor's note to your boss and HR if work requires it and your done. Then take care of yourself and mend.

Don't let them fool you. The law is on your side. If they say anything about your health they are opening themselves up to a big law suit. From now on communicate only in writing if work tries to contact you. You want a record of everything. Once they realize this they will back off.

Sorry to hear about all this.

When I hear stories like this it reminds me why I say...NEVER - EVER tell anyone at work anything about your health. It is none of their business. Period.

I just went through a similar situation and now I am back at work. There has not been one work said about my being off of work after they tried to pressure me.

Good luck to you. Glad you're almost through with treatment. I hope you SVR.

Hectorsf

[Michelle867]

Thanks everyone for the advice and words of encouragement.  I did go to my GP today and she gave me Citalopram for the depression.  I've never heard of it and will look it up in a bit before I start on it.  I also have bronchitis (which is part of the COPD) so I'm now on antibiotics, an inhailer and cough meds.  I did ask her thoughts on the disability and she suggests waiting til after treatment to see what happens.  It seems to me that doctors don't want anything to do with disability.  I also am on strong pain meds from 2 herneated discs in my upper back, fibromyalgia, and osteoporosis.  Of course the pain meds make me extremely tired and I try not to take them when I'm working but the longer I sit the more it hurts so sometimes I have to.  I live in Missouri now.  About five years ago when I lived in Florida I applied for disability and was denied (that was before finding out about the Hep C).  I moved to Missouri and just found a job instead of fighting it.  I kick myself now for not just staying out of work and getting a lawyer to fight it but I can't change the past.  I did call a disability lawyer awhile back and they basically told me that as long as I am currently working I wouldn't stand a chance that I needed to be out of work for awhile first.  I was going to call other lawyers today but got home from the doctor's office at 1:00 and figured I'd sit for a minute then make phone calls.  Next thing I knew it was 6:00.  I am also going to try to find a counsler or therapist and see if that will help some.  I live in a real small town where there are no support groups of any kind and not having any family makes it real hard since I have no one to talk to.  

Thanks again everyone for your advice and listening.  

Michelle

[spunkyjune645]

FMLA - file the papers and it secures your job.

I'm going through the same thing where I work (and I even work in the HR department).  My boss has known all along, even prior to my starting treatments, what the side effects would be, and that they would probably effect my performance.   I was promoted last June with a rating of "Exceeds Expectations".  Started treatment in September, and got my first "verbal warning" in November.  She is still "on my case" about things, even after my doctor sent her and HR letters regarding what I'm going through.  Consequently, I'm keeping a file of all correspondence between us, and written records of our conversations.   If they let me go due to "performance" issues, THEY may have the problem.

Hang in there.   I'm a little over halfway done and am going to finish this out.

[jdwithhcv]

Whatever you do, please DO NOT take legal advice from non-lawyers on the internet.  Well meaning people may give inaccurate advice that, if followed, will cause you harm.  

Contact legal services of Missouri (lsmo.org) for advice and assistance.  Good luck.

jd

[Michelle867]

I know what you mean and agree with you.  I plan on calling a couple attorneys next week to see what they advise regarding disability.  In the meantime, I will continue going to work to my ability until I see what happens.  For one thing the FMLA doesn't pay enough for me to use that more than I have to.  Michelle

[sierranvgrl]

Hi Michelle,
Glad you got on an AD. I think you will start to feel better soon, although I don' t know much about the one you are taking.

Check your company's and state's FMLA policy....here in NV they don't have you pay you while you are on FMLA, but they have to pay your insurance premiums for up to 12 weeks and guarantee your job...however, they can go back up to a year and start to apply the FMLA from when you started missing work. So, in my case, my FMLA expired before my sick time ended and it didn't help me a bit (my company's tricky way to keep from having to pay insurance for employees out for extended periods of time). MO might be different...as well as your company.  Hopefully they will work with you. You have so many issues going on, I bet you would be eligible for SSDI....just a thought.  Anyway, keep me posted. I am pulling for you!

Also, I sent you an email.  Write when you feel up to it!