guidelines for treating drug seekers w/hep c cirrhosis end stage

How do doctors and hospices treat a person who has abused pain medications for years during the end stage time?  I was married and basically still am to a 48 year old man who had end stage chronic hep c w/cirrhosis.  The liver specialist kept saying he was taking too much pain medication and that his life would be better if he did not over do it.  I did not know he had been in and out of rehab until we parted a few weeks ago.  He was on 250 mcg of Fentanyl patches every two days as well as oxycodone (80 a day).  When he ran out of medicine the fluid would come off and he did much better.  He would become so violent when he chewed the patches.  I also found and lab tested straws that proved he was obviously snorting the oxycodone.  I work for a great doctor who had tried to help this man.  He had gotten so out of control on the drugs that he only wanted that an to be all alone.  I have recently found out that he obviously abused cocaine in the past and he had to go to a methadone clinic years ago.  Everyone is entitled to pain treatment but should hospice be supporting his habit?  He would hide his good medicines (lasix, spirolactone, propananol, lactulose).  but yet he only took up his pain meds as well as any other he could get.  I think anyone who is in need should be helped but are their different guidelines when you realize the patient is drug seeking or abusing even if they are on hospice and the hospice kept saying that they could not keep getting those amounts of pain medicines early.  He actually left me b/c he was selling prescription meds out of my house and hospice had told him he was at maximum dose of pain meds.  What does chewing the fentanyl patches and snorting the other do for you?  I put 30,000.00 into this man trying to get him better as far as the liver goes and he left me destitute penniless.  I do hope he gets the best treatment but I just wanted to know if there are guidelines for this behavior.  They are actually going to try to indicte (not sure that is spelled correctly) him next month in front of the grand jury.  I hate for him to be dying and have to go to jail but it is out of myhands also due to the fact I have arsenic in my blood too.  any information would be helpful.  I was a fool to take someone who spun a web of lies to get what he wanted.  I felt very sorry for him when we got together but I guess  we live we learn.  

thanks

[Andromedae]

I'm sorry but the thing that I picked up on was "arsenic in your blood"?
You didn't actually say but are you implying that he somehow did that to you?

Even if that was not the case then all the things that you allowed him to do to you were horrible.

Why did you allow all that and why are you still so concerned about him after all that he did to you?

I may be off base here but perhaps you should think more about yourself and your own need for counseling to answer the above questions?

[alaja]

I have a compassionate heart and I was totally in the dark about his past; I work in the medical field and the doctors here and I were discussing the way my husband was so easily treated his way; WE were just wanting to know if guidelines were out there for the kind of person my soon to be ex is.  

I hope he did not put the arsenic in my blood; most ppl have a certain level.  I am having to go through multiple test for this due to the fact of the cdc having to monitor water levels etc.  

I have started psych therapy due to the fact of what I have been through.  But I want to say I did not know he was actually chewing the patches or the snorting thing until he was gone.  I would not have condoned such behavior.  I believe in doing things right.  I am embarrassed that this man abused the friends and family who tried with all their heart to make his quality of life better.  Little did I know he had other interests.  I did not mean to seem sympathetic to him but he has to be a very sick person besides the terminal illness he has do use hospice and doctors (family dr) to get what he wants.

[Trinity4]

Addicts can the most deceitful people in the world.  They have only one agenda.  Getting high.  They will tell you, doctors, support groups, clergy, etc -  anything you want to hear as long as it allows them to keep on using and abusing.  Sounds like he doesn't care what happens to him and will exhaust every possible resource to obtain the drugs.  It's so sad but happens everyday.  I think he's past the point of getting help, and luckily you are in the emotional recovery process and will continue to be a productive individual despite everything you've been through....My heart goes out to you and I wish you a happy life.
Trinity

[FlGuy]

Time to cut your losses of time, effort, money and frustration. Be compassionate from a good distance.

[Annie441]

I'm so sorry you have had to go through all of this; but if I were you I would call it a lesson learned. Turn and walk away and never look back. I know that sounds harsh, but from what you've said, you care about him, he cares about him, and no one is caring about you.

Ann