I'd say you're BOTH wore out. I finished 48 weeks of TX 9 or 10 weeks ago and the last month or so of my TX was brutal on the mind -- for me and my hubby. I was totally worn out both mind and body yet I still had to work full time. In my treatment-state-of-mind, I didn't feel my hubby was supportive enough and I started feeling resentment, especially when he'd say..."Well, you ONLY have 4 weeks left" in response to my complaints of how awful I felt working a 40 hour week. To me, those words were like a knife in my back. Now that I'm getting my clear mind back I can see that he was just as worn out from watching me go through TX.
So...hang in there and keep yourself in the game until the end. The side-effect meds that are prescribed to you are there for a reason -- use them. When TX is over you most likely will have to wean yourself from them very slowly -- don't quit cold turkey.
Another tip -- be prepared to have family and friends expect you to jump right back into your pre-treatment lifestyle. Trust me -- you won't be able to do that for awhile so don't let others push you to do so...it's all gradual.
I had kind of a difficult treatment myself and a lot of my family was difficult. They particularly did not like the fact that I was on pain meds during tx. It just bothered them no end. I don't think people really understand what treatment is like for us - they really can't if they haven't been there. I say, do what you need to do for yourself. You've got your doctor's ok.
I know exactly how you feel. I am on wk 13 of 24. everything you described i feel the same way.I am on ad's but one day in kroger i wanted to sit in the floor and cry. I don't know why, thank goodnes i did't!!!LOL No one that is or has not been on this treatment does not understand. and there is no way to describe it to them.I also have a unsympathetic husband because I got from iv drugs.he has done drugs but not iv drugs. Drugs are drugs but not to him. I regret what I did but there is no way to change it.I will be so glad when this is over!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
I'm on the last few weeks of the boceprevir trial as well. My last shot is November 10. That leaves me 4 more and I think that means I'm in week 44. I've been doing fairly well since they re-randomized us at week 28, where it's obvious that I went from the real thing to the placebo. Still the interferon and riba bring their own challenges.
For me, as I get closer to the end, I find I'm REALLY ready to be done with this. SO done. I'm not on ADs, and I haven't been taking anything for sx--except for procrit from time to time (not consistently--I became much less anemic after the re-randomization, which was another sign I was off the real thing). But I am so tired of taking pills. So tired of filling out pill information in their stupid Palm diary (that is slower than molasses in the snow). So tired of waking up to take pills and then having trouble going back to sleep. So tired of drinking water. So tired of every skin cell being dry dry dry. So tired of being breathless and not having energy. So tired of being tired . . .
But we are almost there!
All I can say is hang in there. I think this is like being on a marathon. We are so close. We can almost see the finish line, but we're not there yet. But one step at a time, one more dose at a time, one day at a time and we will get there.
The "last tive weeks" - wow that's one more full moon :-).... congratulations - as a 24 weeker, I find it hard to imagine how anyone has done longer than that. It's exhausting and emotionally draining on those around you too.
Try to get your wife to read through some of the threads on this site. I printed some out during tx, to help my partner realise that it wasn't 'just me' and I wasn't 'going crazy'; I was just having a very difficult time and needed some space and understanding. He complied thank goodness.
My friend did 48 weeks, and took sometime to rebalance even after the tx. Suffice to say, a year post tx she is now totally unmedicated and doing well. The last 2 months of her tx was the hardest for her. I echo Trish; take in day by day as you have been; you're nearly there.
First I want to say congratulations for making it all the way through to 43 weeks of treatment. I really hope this works for you and that you never have to do this again.
Second, I'd get yourself quickly to your trial nurse/doctor and question them about the benzo/prozac thing. You did mention you're on the boceprevir trial and usually on trials your nurse and doc have some input on what other meds you take so I'm assuming they're the ones managing this part of this also? Perhaps there is a different drug combination that would work better for you. You're done treatment in five weeks but it's not usually suggested that you stop anti-depressants and whatnot immediately after treatment or start tapering just yet either as ending treatment itself brings a number of physiological and psychological changes. So you've got a bit of a mental ride to take yet. Therefore, I'd agree with the others and see if there are better drugs you could be taking that will sit better with you and perhaps it does take a trip to a psychologist and preferably one who has experience treating people with illnesses - that last one is a tall order, but hey, I'll throw it in there and you never know what you find.
Good luck - five weeks to go!! Take it a step at a time and hang in there.
Trish
Hello there...
Treatment can be so unkind to us. It effects us not only physically but also emotionally. My perception was totally altered whilst on treatment. Treatment wears us out at times. I can remember one night I just wanted to fall to the floor and not do this anymore.......that feeling was gone in the morning though. I am hoping that things will get better for you soon. I am two weeks post treatment and feeling so much better.......hang in there .......there is light at the end of the tunnel.
all the best
Linda
Agree with desert. The last few months of tx can be extremely difficult whether you treat 24, 48 or 72 wks. The mind and body are exhausted from the interferon and ribaviron and adding Prozac and benzos to the mix can increases the fatigue. Many people must take something to help them through treatment but the flipside of AD'S or benzo's is they can and in many cases contribute to that worn out feeling and it can be very difficut when stopping usage. Benzos are addictive so do be careful. Withdrawl from them is nasty business.
Good Luck
dabdees
You're worn out, she's worn out, might be time for a third opinion. If it's just your family doc or your gastro's office that are Rxing the Prozac and benzos you might do well to consult with a for real psych doc with a good knowledge of brain chemistry. A change in 'script or other insight could be a good investment at this point.
Take care.
I'm a newbie, just diagnosed. Just wishing you some good wishes and telling you to hang in there. Stay on this board for support (which I know you know by now). I'm scared to death and love seeing more and more people go SVR. You will too!! Good luck!
Sorry to hear this,but may i ask you what week you went UD,as i too am in,or was ,in the BOC RESPOND-2 trail,i know its hard to tell if you got the real BOC, but knowing if you cleared fast would help and maybe you could stop the the TX..I AM NOT suggesting yo to do this ,but 48 weeks of BOC ,if your getting it,is a tuff ride,.do you have that rotten morning mouth and your lips taste almost sweet?...this is what i felt and i was getting the real BOC..
im still UN at wk 4 post,just waiting for my 3 month post in 7 days and im a ball of nerves
William R. Bradford
"Our lives can become cluttered by many things. Some are obvious, such as material things, the stuff we collect. I really wish I were able to give a lesson on how to prioritize the material things-how to sort them, dispose of some, and put the rest in order-but I'm not qualified... But how well I know that we can surround ourselves with the material things to the extent that we have no time for the spiritual. Look around and you will see all the gadgets and toys and the nice and the fun things that cause us to squander and pay and to wander and play".