Aa
Good people!
Well...... a Happy Post :}
Someone had posted on a thread about 'sneaky arse' people at work trying to slide in and take her sales (can't remember, find the *&^%$ post now.) , yet others being very supportive.
WELL..... have mentioned..... '2 jobs- 1 a tiki bar, 1 shipping horse's (and now another biz venture!), both 'jobs' being very physical, LONG hours, etc. so haven't been able to do Tiki at all, and not the last flight .....SOOOO .......as I am in 3rd week out of work at Tiki (still get pd. for flights, pre-work, informal FML) I got a HUGE get well card with a WAD of money in it! Over 100 signatures and they were 'love you, miss u', not 'get well, best wishes', etc. :} And getting more cards in the mail daily....to date....my bill's are paid thru December !!!! They had been, sneakily, doing 'pools' and 'games' for "LL's 'FML' leave" , as we don't have it! Many of these people were at our annual Halloween party and all were 'hush-hush' on it all.
The couple that brought me the card, with food :} said "we all love you, miss you and want you better and you trying to go back to work thru this is OUT, your not working until your tx is done!" (they know it is 10-12 hour days, very demanding, physical plus I am around about 100-200 people a day-as per if immune get's low.) When I said 'OMIGOD and THAT'S IT, no more"...they said "ahh, shut up, you have no say-so here."!
(Bare in mind, my good friend of 23 years, also works there, is not the most pleasant person. I am 98% ALWAYS smiling, happy.)
How cool was that? I am not a poor woman, nor a rich one, but surely can't afford to not work at all and I was always the 1st one to 'do for' others in need there....so guess my 'karma' is working for me. Been there near 4 years, a 'retirement' area....they party more than I ever did!.....and many are like friends/family now. More than one teared up when it got out I was 'sick'.
Anyway...question to follow and odd one after this great story about my great customers!
About 250-300 'regulars/snow birds’ there. MOST good people, BUT .....as there are many 'old school' folks there, we have said all along I have a 'blood disorder'.....the ones we're closest to do know, that we know are intelligent enough to not have that 'stigma disorder', and me being a TERRIBLE liar......my co-workers, sister in Human resource’s job, all agreed to not tell all, as would crush me to be treated badly (tough girl exterior, softy inside :}. But many keep asking, "WHAT is it called"?? Most out of concern , but there are gossips in every circle. So what can I say?
When it's done, want to, will tell ALL and than tell WHY I was afraid to be 'honest', but for now, all of us 'close' ones agree to not disclose. Feeling 'hypocritical', while knowing they are right. What to do??
Thanks for listening to me babble! Can't sleep, time for pill ???? LOL
LL
You just need a group hug ((((((( Lauri )))))))) that's from all of us on here, so that you feel like you've had hugs, when all those other ignorant people just wave..... Susan
Ohh, ohhhh......and the one that ALL he talked about was his divorce, crazy ex-wife, on prozac now, for 3 hours, and than the bill came and his CC wouldn't work and I had to pay the whole bill!!
After that I made a 'joke' date application!
Part of it was...........
If your ex wife lives with in 100 miles?
Do you HAVE a job?
If you are in need of re-hab, intensive therapy or live with your mother?
Than DON'T call :}
You'd have to see the rest of it (not on this site:), but e-mailed it out to friends, they loved it.
The 'Dating application".
LL
After that I made a 'joke' date application!
Part of it was...........
If your ex wife lives with in 100 miles?
Do you HAVE a job?
If you are in need of re-hab, intensive therapy or live with your mother?
Than DON'T call :}
You'd have to see the rest of it (not on this site:), but e-mailed it out to friends, they loved it.
The 'Dating application".
LL
That's a good idea.....bad dates :}
All the ones I had that I thought were 'together' guys and 20 minutes into the date "hey, ya' wanna do a bump" ? SEE YA
('bump' for those that may not know.....line of coke.)
LL
All the ones I had that I thought were 'together' guys and 20 minutes into the date "hey, ya' wanna do a bump" ? SEE YA
('bump' for those that may not know.....line of coke.)
LL
The sad fact is.............there will ALWAYS be gossipers, 2 faced, stigma type people out there.
If you have a LOT of people in your life, work, friends, whatever.....it does need to be as forseegood said.... a case by case scenario.
Our lack of wanting to always scream it out loud is too often taken as 'ashamed' and that's just not it, it's that worry of being treated like a lepper, a usual 'hug' person turns into a 'hey wave' and so on. And too often that small gesture or the conversation is not enough to lead into the 'HEY, you know I am not contagious, it's only blood to blood' educational speech we may want to give.
I also think the ones we don't feel secure to tell will learn something when they find out we were afraid to tell because of their past remarks on Aids, the N**ger word, the ignorant remarks and prejudice they have shown before.
LL
If you have a LOT of people in your life, work, friends, whatever.....it does need to be as forseegood said.... a case by case scenario.
Our lack of wanting to always scream it out loud is too often taken as 'ashamed' and that's just not it, it's that worry of being treated like a lepper, a usual 'hug' person turns into a 'hey wave' and so on. And too often that small gesture or the conversation is not enough to lead into the 'HEY, you know I am not contagious, it's only blood to blood' educational speech we may want to give.
I also think the ones we don't feel secure to tell will learn something when they find out we were afraid to tell because of their past remarks on Aids, the N**ger word, the ignorant remarks and prejudice they have shown before.
LL
I'd like to add that one of the 1st things I did yesterday was 'donate' some of that money, as in 'paying it forward' and had enough.
LL
LL
I'm not 'ashamed' of anything and I DID most likely get this over 30 years ago in teenage experimentation with drugs, (jurys out on that?) but than went forth, became anti drug and used that exp. to sway others from 'experimenting' and now tell about my Hep C and say ...see, 'DON'T even try it"!
Remember, at that job I am in senior ville, along with the food industry, drinks, food, etc. Many would/could unknowingly mistake it for type A or B and panic on the 'contagious' factor, that was the deciding factor at that job. All else in my life do know, with great response's
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I would tell the people who are donating to your bills. If they find out you are not being honest it wont be good.
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These 'pools-games' were run 'behind my back' knowing I would have put a halt to it and I seriously doubt anyone participating in them would get p*ssed off to find it's Hep C and say "Oh, I wouldn't have done that". They'd still care about me if I had HIV, cancer or Hep., just don't want the "oh, can I catch it " ones hurting my feelings, panicking if the 'gossips' say type A or B by mistake. I have been there 4 yrs. & contributed time (LOTS), money and help to many of our ailing customers, I wasn't mad when we found out it was Arties fault as he had cirrhosis, kept drinking and didn't tell us, hid it from us ,we'd still help him. (He's since quit and doing better, BTW.)
If your place of work, especially food industry, had a secret pool for you, would you walk in, pick up a loud speaker and say "Oh and BTW, I have Hep C" ?
The point was how to handle those we feel are 'old school' for now.
LL
Remember, at that job I am in senior ville, along with the food industry, drinks, food, etc. Many would/could unknowingly mistake it for type A or B and panic on the 'contagious' factor, that was the deciding factor at that job. All else in my life do know, with great response's
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I would tell the people who are donating to your bills. If they find out you are not being honest it wont be good.
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These 'pools-games' were run 'behind my back' knowing I would have put a halt to it and I seriously doubt anyone participating in them would get p*ssed off to find it's Hep C and say "Oh, I wouldn't have done that". They'd still care about me if I had HIV, cancer or Hep., just don't want the "oh, can I catch it " ones hurting my feelings, panicking if the 'gossips' say type A or B by mistake. I have been there 4 yrs. & contributed time (LOTS), money and help to many of our ailing customers, I wasn't mad when we found out it was Arties fault as he had cirrhosis, kept drinking and didn't tell us, hid it from us ,we'd still help him. (He's since quit and doing better, BTW.)
If your place of work, especially food industry, had a secret pool for you, would you walk in, pick up a loud speaker and say "Oh and BTW, I have Hep C" ?
The point was how to handle those we feel are 'old school' for now.
LL
talk about amusing, or bad, which can be amusing, dates we've all had...or not, lol....
national public radio ain't what it used to be...quite obviously that guy was more ofa rush limbaugh,clear channel moron....do you really have a jetpack?
youre right of course, but sometimes I think maybe I'm just being too narcissistic, and what really happened is that "he wasn't that into me" and thought of the most obnoxious line of macho, bs reasoning he could think of, so I could jetpack out of his car, pronto! lol.....
OMG....it's such a deal killer this, I probably wouldn't be married now if I'd known I had it.
It's like the nun sentence/chastity belt without the doting fahter/Pope anywhere in sight!!
and when to tell...another big one.
this reminds me of an friend who kept things on the QT about her enormous wealth, because she wanted to wait and see if there was any chance of serious personality/spirit/connectivity before disclosing that (and making him Run towards her.)
....and it got serious, and she was smitten,
but before she came out and told him about the Millions, he broke it to her that it "wouldn't work out ever, because she was too poor for him." Good ridance.....she never told him.
Only relevant in the sense that if somehow, a guy/gals persona comes out with something before you get your courage up....maybe there was a reason you were hesitant...maybe SomeOne wanted you to see something....good thing you did, I'd say.
It's like the nun sentence/chastity belt without the doting fahter/Pope anywhere in sight!!
and when to tell...another big one.
this reminds me of an friend who kept things on the QT about her enormous wealth, because she wanted to wait and see if there was any chance of serious personality/spirit/connectivity before disclosing that (and making him Run towards her.)
....and it got serious, and she was smitten,
but before she came out and told him about the Millions, he broke it to her that it "wouldn't work out ever, because she was too poor for him." Good ridance.....she never told him.
Only relevant in the sense that if somehow, a guy/gals persona comes out with something before you get your courage up....maybe there was a reason you were hesitant...maybe SomeOne wanted you to see something....good thing you did, I'd say.
Everyone I've told has replied that they have a cousin, niece, or sister in law that has HCV. Sold my too-fast skiis to this guy over Craig's list--his sister in law went thru treatment succesfully. Had a date with a crazy dancing lady (we wore rodeo bumblebee clown costumes to the Zydeco dance) she had a sister who went thru treatment. On and on.
I have no reason to be ashamed. I dont go around with a sign on my head but I tell if someone ask. Who cares what everyone thinks? I am not a drug user and far from a alcholic. At best sh*t happens. If some one doesnt understand then tell them. Hell they probably need to be tested. I would tell the people who are donating to your bills. If they find out you are not being honest it wont be good.
Ah, c'mon......you could've broke that dude in, heh, heh. What an arse! Tho I'd have loved to know what he'd say in discussing it further and correcting the 'wrong impression' he gave you :}
Agree on that, a stranger, just met person no reason to go into at all, especially in a circle of he know's her, she tell's them and so on...AKA...gossip line.
" I am from Fl., moved to Colorado, have 3 sons, 2 sisters, love dogs, ride and have Hep C".......not 1st, 2nd date conversation , LOL.
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"(Course I'm not going to get intimate with anybody I don't really care about, know and trust anyway, this ain't the 70s.lol)"
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Nope, morals are 'in' and a shot don't cure all anymore!
Now.....24, 48, 72 shots, 20,000 pills and a bit of h*ll can!!
LL
Agree on that, a stranger, just met person no reason to go into at all, especially in a circle of he know's her, she tell's them and so on...AKA...gossip line.
" I am from Fl., moved to Colorado, have 3 sons, 2 sisters, love dogs, ride and have Hep C".......not 1st, 2nd date conversation , LOL.
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"(Course I'm not going to get intimate with anybody I don't really care about, know and trust anyway, this ain't the 70s.lol)"
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Nope, morals are 'in' and a shot don't cure all anymore!
Now.....24, 48, 72 shots, 20,000 pills and a bit of h*ll can!!
LL
Me too, get hurt if someone shunned me for this, but also know what it would show about them and I wouldn't want much closeness with them after that. I am very content, faith in people 'hightened' at how not one person in my life has even slightly changed towards me, except for concern and more kindness, help. All the same hugs, kiss's, relationships. Been very refreshing. And this is many people, not just sons, family. Their friends, girlfriends, my friends, etc. Funny, it's more me saying 'don't hug me, you have a cold', LOL. A 'crowd' of people tho, like at work, with some close, some not....just decided not to take that chance. I pick and choose my battles carefully, especially emotionally, and that is just not one to have right now. But why I do want to tell all when I am done and SVR :}........is to maybe make them more aware for anyone else they may run across later. As in......couldn't be honest with all because of uneducated people treating others like we're contagious to touch or stand by! We'll see, but knowing me, that is what I'll do :}
LL
LL
with me, it's always on a case by case basis, as far as who I tell. I used to be really mouthy about it, and I told almost everyone, then I realized, that is more info than many people need, or know what do to with, and it didn't serve any purpose, except make some friends and family worry about me, unnecessarily.
I should of chosen better, in the beginning. That's why I think as far as dating, that person doesn't deserve to know unless you plan on getting intimate with them, and know them really well.
I don't know about anybody else, but I've been on some wacko dates before, and I'm dang glad I didn't tell certain "dates" I've had. (Course I'm not going to get intimate with anybody I don't really care about, know and trust anyway, this ain't the 70s.lol)
One time I was going out with this guy, and he seemed great. Educated and intelligent, amusing, he was kind of known in my business, good looking, informed about the world, everything. He was a friend of another friend of mine (did I have a bone to pick with him! ha ha)
I had gone out with him about about 2 times, he seemed really great in a lot of ways. Then, on the third date I think, we're driving home from dinner, and we were discussing politics or some such thing, he looked me straight in the eye and told me this...."I know youre an intelligent woman, and all that...but a woman is the only creature on earth that can serve a man's 5 senses...like no other creature....if I want intelligent discourse, I'll listen to the radio, National Public Radio, or something like that....I don't need intelligent conversation in a woman, I need her to satisfy all my senses...." At that point, he really shut me up, and that's saying something! lol....
I didn't say anything else till he dropped me off at my house, then while I was getting out of the car, I told him, you realize I wouldn't go out with you under any circumstances, please never call me again, I don't know what your problem is, but I don't go out with Neanderthals or last century throw-backs like you. He started giggling and asking me if we could discuss it further, he might of given me the wrong impression. YUCK!!!! Just imagine if I would of shared anything as personal as my having hep c with that creep! lol....
I should of chosen better, in the beginning. That's why I think as far as dating, that person doesn't deserve to know unless you plan on getting intimate with them, and know them really well.
I don't know about anybody else, but I've been on some wacko dates before, and I'm dang glad I didn't tell certain "dates" I've had. (Course I'm not going to get intimate with anybody I don't really care about, know and trust anyway, this ain't the 70s.lol)
One time I was going out with this guy, and he seemed great. Educated and intelligent, amusing, he was kind of known in my business, good looking, informed about the world, everything. He was a friend of another friend of mine (did I have a bone to pick with him! ha ha)
I had gone out with him about about 2 times, he seemed really great in a lot of ways. Then, on the third date I think, we're driving home from dinner, and we were discussing politics or some such thing, he looked me straight in the eye and told me this...."I know youre an intelligent woman, and all that...but a woman is the only creature on earth that can serve a man's 5 senses...like no other creature....if I want intelligent discourse, I'll listen to the radio, National Public Radio, or something like that....I don't need intelligent conversation in a woman, I need her to satisfy all my senses...." At that point, he really shut me up, and that's saying something! lol....
I didn't say anything else till he dropped me off at my house, then while I was getting out of the car, I told him, you realize I wouldn't go out with you under any circumstances, please never call me again, I don't know what your problem is, but I don't go out with Neanderthals or last century throw-backs like you. He started giggling and asking me if we could discuss it further, he might of given me the wrong impression. YUCK!!!! Just imagine if I would of shared anything as personal as my having hep c with that creep! lol....
When it's done, want to, will tell ALL and than tell WHY I was afraid to be 'honest', but for now, all of us 'close' ones agree to not disclose. Feeling 'hypocritical', while knowing they are right. What to do??
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Ya know what, for me personally, I don't tell anyone that I have hep c. If down the road it leaks out that you had hep C, none of your friends that you "didn't tell" should get mad at you. They should understand why you didn't tell them once you explain. If they stay mad - then I guess they weren't a real friend to begin with cause as they say, time heals all wounds and if the wounds don't heal and restoration doesn't take place, then ya just have to forgive and forget. I think it sounds like you have alot of nice people around you and it will work out one way or the other. I guess there is a certain freedom you feel when you are able to trust someone (who doesn't have hep c themselves) and feel that they won't shy from you or look at you differently. I get hurt easily. I always expect my friends to be there for me, protect me and all of that, so rather than be dissapointed, I didn't tell anyone that is around me - maybe everyone would have been fine and supportive and all that - but I am too sensitive to take that chance and get hurt - been hurt a few times too many in life and I try to avoid "avoidable pain" at all costs.
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Ya know what, for me personally, I don't tell anyone that I have hep c. If down the road it leaks out that you had hep C, none of your friends that you "didn't tell" should get mad at you. They should understand why you didn't tell them once you explain. If they stay mad - then I guess they weren't a real friend to begin with cause as they say, time heals all wounds and if the wounds don't heal and restoration doesn't take place, then ya just have to forgive and forget. I think it sounds like you have alot of nice people around you and it will work out one way or the other. I guess there is a certain freedom you feel when you are able to trust someone (who doesn't have hep c themselves) and feel that they won't shy from you or look at you differently. I get hurt easily. I always expect my friends to be there for me, protect me and all of that, so rather than be dissapointed, I didn't tell anyone that is around me - maybe everyone would have been fine and supportive and all that - but I am too sensitive to take that chance and get hurt - been hurt a few times too many in life and I try to avoid "avoidable pain" at all costs.
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