Aa
Jjust a little something on the lighter side
Your Duck is Dead!
A woman brought a very limp duck into a veterinary surgeon. As she laid her pet on the table, the vet pulled out his stethoscope and listened to the bird's chest.
After a moment or two, the vet shook his head and sadly said, "I'm sorry, your duck, Cuddles, has passed away."
The distressed woman wailed, "Are you sure?"
"Yes, I am sure. Your duck is dead," replied the vet..
"How can you be so sure?" she protested. "I mean you haven't done any testing on him or anything. He might just be in a coma or something."
The vet rolled his eyes, turned around and left the room. He returned a few minutes later with a black Labrador Retriever. As the duck's owner looked on in amazement, the dog stood on his hind legs, put his front paws on the examination table and sniffed the duck from top to bottom. He then looked up at the vet with sad eyes and shook his head.
The vet patted the dog on the head and took it out of the room. A few minutes later he returned with a cat. The cat jumped on the table and also delicately sniffed the bird from head to foot. The cat sat back on its haunches, shook its head, meowed softly and strolled out of the room.
The vet looked at the woman and said, "I'm sorry, but as I said, this is most definitely, 100% certifiably, a dead duck."
The vet turned to his computer terminal, hit a few keys and produced a bill, which he handed to the woman..
The duck's owner, still in shock, took the bill. "$150!" she cried, "$150 just to tell me my duck is dead!"
The vet shrugged, "I'm sorry. If you had just taken my word for it, the bill would have been $20, but with the Lab Report and the Cat Scan, it's now $150."
A woman brought a very limp duck into a veterinary surgeon. As she laid her pet on the table, the vet pulled out his stethoscope and listened to the bird's chest.
After a moment or two, the vet shook his head and sadly said, "I'm sorry, your duck, Cuddles, has passed away."
The distressed woman wailed, "Are you sure?"
"Yes, I am sure. Your duck is dead," replied the vet..
"How can you be so sure?" she protested. "I mean you haven't done any testing on him or anything. He might just be in a coma or something."
The vet rolled his eyes, turned around and left the room. He returned a few minutes later with a black Labrador Retriever. As the duck's owner looked on in amazement, the dog stood on his hind legs, put his front paws on the examination table and sniffed the duck from top to bottom. He then looked up at the vet with sad eyes and shook his head.
The vet patted the dog on the head and took it out of the room. A few minutes later he returned with a cat. The cat jumped on the table and also delicately sniffed the bird from head to foot. The cat sat back on its haunches, shook its head, meowed softly and strolled out of the room.
The vet looked at the woman and said, "I'm sorry, but as I said, this is most definitely, 100% certifiably, a dead duck."
The vet turned to his computer terminal, hit a few keys and produced a bill, which he handed to the woman..
The duck's owner, still in shock, took the bill. "$150!" she cried, "$150 just to tell me my duck is dead!"
The vet shrugged, "I'm sorry. If you had just taken my word for it, the bill would have been $20, but with the Lab Report and the Cat Scan, it's now $150."
That takes the cake Will... Ill have to come back and visit this one for more laughs. Hehe...
I think I will even pass this on to my vet and my other vet's (a gal has to have more than one vet. Just incase ) They will probally post it on their walls.
Thanks hehe
I think I will even pass this on to my vet and my other vet's (a gal has to have more than one vet. Just incase ) They will probally post it on their walls.
Thanks hehe
So funny! When we got our first yellow lab my husband took her dog hunting. He shot the duck and told her to retrieve, she swam out to the duck nudged with har nose turned and looked at my husband as to say you don't want it it's dead. She ended up just being our loving pet.
:)
GD:
Should have sent that gal a keyboard message that you're sick and asked her for a cat-scan.
GD:
Should have sent that gal a keyboard message that you're sick and asked her for a cat-scan.
Family Tree of Vincent Van Gogh:
His dizzy aunt ----------------------------------------------- Verti Gogh
The brother who ate prunes------------------------------- Gotta Gogh
The brother who worked at a convenience store ------ Stop N Gogh
The grandfather from Yugoslavia ----------------------------- U Gogh
His magician uncle -------------------------------- Where-diddy Gogh
His Mexican cousin ---------------------------------------- A Mee Gogh
The Mexican cousin's American half-brother ------------ Gring Gogh
The nephew who drove a stage coach --------------- Wells-far Gogh
The constipated uncle ------------------------------------- Can't Gogh
The ballroom dancing aunt -------------------------------- Tang Gogh
The bird lover uncle -------------------------------------- Flamin Gogh
The fruit-loving cousin -------------------------------------- Man Gogh
An aunt who taught positive thinking ------------------ Way-to-Gogh
The little bouncy nephew ----------------------------------- Poe Gogh
A sister who loved disco -------------------------------------- Go Gogh
And his niece who travels the country in an RV --- Winnie Bay Gogh
His dizzy aunt ----------------------------------------------- Verti Gogh
The brother who ate prunes------------------------------- Gotta Gogh
The brother who worked at a convenience store ------ Stop N Gogh
The grandfather from Yugoslavia ----------------------------- U Gogh
His magician uncle -------------------------------- Where-diddy Gogh
His Mexican cousin ---------------------------------------- A Mee Gogh
The Mexican cousin's American half-brother ------------ Gring Gogh
The nephew who drove a stage coach --------------- Wells-far Gogh
The constipated uncle ------------------------------------- Can't Gogh
The ballroom dancing aunt -------------------------------- Tang Gogh
The bird lover uncle -------------------------------------- Flamin Gogh
The fruit-loving cousin -------------------------------------- Man Gogh
An aunt who taught positive thinking ------------------ Way-to-Gogh
The little bouncy nephew ----------------------------------- Poe Gogh
A sister who loved disco -------------------------------------- Go Gogh
And his niece who travels the country in an RV --- Winnie Bay Gogh
A gal pointed at my limp duck and said Your duck is dead.. Hmmmm ... keyboard broke. It keeps typing the letter u.
Yeah Cin...but if I tried to do that with Logan...it would proly just end up like this
..http://www.shutterstock.com/pic-11023693/stock-photo-chocolate-labrador-retriever-holds-dead-mallard-duck-in-his-mouth.html
..http://www.shutterstock.com/pic-11023693/stock-photo-chocolate-labrador-retriever-holds-dead-mallard-duck-in-his-mouth.html
Only you!!!!Thats too funny!!!
Dont you have a lab???Maybe you could make some extra cash !!!!! cindy
Dont you have a lab???Maybe you could make some extra cash !!!!! cindy
So a guy dies and goes to heaven and he is waiting in line to get through those pearly gates. Up comes a guy dressed in green scrubs, OR booties, surgical mask, rubber gloves and wearing a stethescope around his neck. People move out of the way as he bolts to the front of the line and St. Peter nods his head as he sails past everyone else and into heaven. So the guy in the back of the line scratches his head and, after what seems like an eternity, finally makes his way to the head of the line. He then asks St. Peter why the individual dressed in a surgeon's gown got in ahead of everyone else. St. Peter says "Oh Him? That was just God. He thinks he's a doctor!".
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